going through divorce - Page 5

The importance of pet nups during divorce proceedings
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Importance of ‘Pet Nups’ Highlighted by Former Couple Ant McPartlin and Lisa Armstrong

Natasha Abel
Natasha Abel
Family Law Solicitor
Brindley Twist Tafft & James Solicitors

Former spouses Ant McPartlin and Lisa Armstrong have recently been back in the headlines – almost three years after their divorce – this time as they prepare for a fresh battle over custody of their pet dog.

While who might get to keep the pets in the event of a break-up may not be a priority discussion among happy couples, leading solicitor Brindley Twist Tafft & James (BTTJ) warns it can often be a contributory factor in bitter disputes among those who later break up.

Most importantly, any mutual decision should be formalised with an official legal document, or ‘pet nup’.

Most of us have probably made light-hearted comments at one time or another about keeping our pets in the event of a break-up. But without a formalised document such jokes can escalate into full-blown battles between former couples who have gone their separate ways.

We see pets as family and it is so easy for them to become yet another subject of dispute alongside the children, property, pensions and finances.

Once a couple has split up it is in the best interests of both parties to try to reach agreement between themselves over the welfare of a pet.

If no agreement is reached the couple may approach a solicitor who will suggest mediation or, as a last resort, court proceedings.

A pet nup is a detailed agreement between two partners which specifies who the pet lives with, who pays for the upkeep – food, vet bills, insurance and other costs, who decides on medical treatment and what will happen to the animal if the relationship breaks down.

We would always urge that an agreement is formally drawn up and legal advice is sought by both parties before signing the document. Then, if the relationship did break down, it avoids future conflict as to the welfare of the animal.

Some people are happy for their pets to live with one party during the week while the other takes care of them during holidays. Others are happy to look after the pet for half a week each.

As well as couples, pet nups are open to families and even friends who share pets. Although not yet formally recognised, law courts are still very likely to uphold pet nups if it can be proven that:

  • Both parties entered into the agreement freely
  • Neither party was under undue pressure or subject to misrepresentation
  • Both parties sought legal advice
  • Both parties intend that the agreement is final in governing future welfare of the pet
  • Both parties understand the implications of the pet nup
  • There is sufficient evidence within the document to prove that the pet nup is fair and in the interests of the pet.

About Natasha

Natasha Abel is a Family Law Solicitor at Brindley Twist Tafft & James Solicitors, where she deals with a whole range of family matters whether they are straight forward or very complex. She spends 40% of her working time on family matters and 60% of her working time on matrimonial matters.

As a member of Resolution, Natasha works in accordance with their Code of Practice to deal with matters in a constructive manner. Natasha works with her clients to provide support and explore all options including not only the court process, but other methods of dispute resolution to best suit their individual needs.

Natasha is also a member of the Law Society‘s Family Law Panel and has been accredited since 2011. Accreditations within the panel show that the individual is a specialist in their area of law.

10 Steps to Divorce Financial Settlement
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10 Steps to Divorce Financial Settlement

Peter Marples
Peter Marples
Director
Fair Result

Agreeing a financial settlement is a huge milestone during the negotiation process of a divorce. It is advised that separating couples obtain a financial order that sets out this settlement, as whilst this is not mandatory, it will make this agreement legally binding.

Some lucky couples can decide on how to divide up their assets, agreeing their financial settlement without the need of going to court. However, to ensure both parties are protected, and the agreement is legally binding, a solicitor can draft a ‘consent order’ that both parties must sign.

This is then sent to the court with a completed Form A (notice of your intention to proceed with an application for a financial order), a Form D81 (statement about the parties’ financial situation to support your application for a consent order), and a £53 fee (administration fee).

However, a lot of couples fail to agree on a divorce financial settlement, which means that the court will have to decide for them.

In most cases, the process will follow the ten steps highlighted below, however, an agreement can be made at any point during this process. If that is the case, then this is agreed and signed in a legally binding court order to confirm all the details.

Providing notice of application – Form A

To kick start the financial settlement process, you will need to send a completed Form A (notice of your intention to proceed with an application for a financial order) to the courts.

This document will outline the kind of financial order you are looking for, at what stage you are at with the divorce or dissolution of a civil partnership proceeding, contact details of the separating couple or legal representatives, and information about the Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM).

First Directions Appointment date

Once you have provided your application, the court will then set a date for the First Directions Appointment (FDA). This is the first hearing in relation to your financial dispute arising from your divorce.

This is an opportunity for the judge to consider what information each party needs to provide to create the divorce financial settlement. Both parties are encouraged to reach an agreement if possible. If this cannot be agreed, a second hearing with the FDA will be arranged to allow for further negotiation.

Financial statement – Form E

Form E (Financial Statement) is an important document in the UK divorce process since it acts as the starting point for the financial settlement negotiations.

Both parties send the court a Form E at least five weeks before the FDA hearing. You must also send a copy to each other.

The purpose of this document is to ensure both parties disclose their financial circumstances, including income, assets, liabilities, and projected financial needs.

FDA documents

These documents are filed by both parties two weeks before the FDA:

  • A concise statement of issues.
  • A chronology of events.
  • A questionnaire which is supposed to address the statement of issues.
  • A Form G, whereby you tell the court whether the FDA meeting can be used for a Financial Dispute Resolution (FDR) appointment. Typically, the FDR meeting takes place after the FDA meeting.

Costs – Form H

At this stage, each party will send the court a completed Form H just before the FDA meeting, listing any costs they have incurred.

This document sets out all the costs of the financial remedy proceedings, including costs from before and after the application was issued.

FDA meeting at court

The judge will consider both you and your partner’s financial disclosures and establish whether further information is required from either of you.

Many judges are keen to see whether a resolution meeting (skip to the final hearing section) can take place at this stage. If not, a date is set for the FDR meeting.

File proposals

Both parties will answer questionnaires, prepare evidence, and submit proposals to the court for the divorce financial settlement.

Both sides also submit a second Form H, which lists updated costs.

FDR hearing

During this hearing, the judge will focus on encouraging both parties to agree on a financial settlement, through judge-led negotiations.

Most divorcing couples settle at this stage (or soon afterwards). If not, the judge will arrange a final hearing, where both parties will need to make new offers and provide evidence.

Further proposals

The negotiations continue between both parties, including revised proposals for the divorce financial settlement which are sent to the court and to the other party.

Final hearing

This is usually the third and final court hearing within the financial remedy process.

In the absence of any agreement and following the submission of updated costs on a Form H1, a new judge will decide on your financial position and impose a settlement on your behalf.

Summary

One of the most important parts of getting a divorce is reaching a financial settlement. Many couples can agree this without the need of going to court however, but a lot of separating partners find difficulty in achieving this.

Perhaps one person is not providing their financial information, or they are not making sensible proposals, in that case, court is advisable.

By following these simple steps and receiving professional advice, you will be on your way to a Fair Result and a happy, brighter future.

Do you require specialist expertise in securing financial settlement? Get in touch with our team today.

Read more articles by Fair Result.

About Peter Marples

Peter Marples – Director of Fair Result and qualified accountant, with the determination to change the way divorce is transacted. For further advice on financial settlements and navigating divorce, use the contact details below:

  • Email
  • Give the team a call – 07500933818 or 0333 577 7009
  • Complete an enquiry form
How do I find the right family mediator for my divorce?
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How Do I Find the Right Family Mediator for my Divorce?

Nicki Mitchell
Nicki Mitchell
Partner
Jones Myers

If you opt to settle your divorce through mediation rather than a drawn out, expensive and contentious Court settlement, choosing the right mediator is vital.

Here are some guidelines to help ensure the best possible outcome for you, your ex, and – most importantly – any children involved in your relationship breakdown.

Who chooses the mediator?

The first step if for each of you separately to attend a confidential Mediation Information Assessment Meeting (MIAM) with a qualified mediator who should  be approved by the Family Mediation Council (FMC).

You can appoint your own mediator through the FMC register which lists mediators near where you live.

At the MIAM you both discuss with the mediator key issues that need resolving. If you have children, the mediator should explain to you how your children’s voice can be heard within the process.

The mediator will explain the mediation  process and consider with you alternative ways of resolving the issues between you.  At the end of the session, you and the Mediator will come to a decision together as to whether you think mediation is suitable for you.

Why should the mediator have to be approved by the FMC?

Anyone with no training or qualifications can claim to be a family mediator.

FMC approval gives you the confidence that the mediator entrusted with this crucial role has been trained – and is qualified, and fully insured.

What is the mediator’s role after the MIAM?

If mediation is the way forward, the mediator who conducted your MIAM will set up a joint meeting with the two of you

Your chosen mediator will help you both work out key issues such as children contact and support along with dividing assets, property, pensions, and debts.

It can be very helpful in disputes relating to financial issues for you to use an FMC accredited mediator who is also a family lawyer. Although they will remain impartial in the process, they will be able to give you very useful legal information in the mediation, providing explanations as to how the legal process works and the options available to you around your properties, debt, pension, and income.

Where there is a need for you to take your own legal advice, this will be flagged up by the mediator.

Giving couples control over their divorce, mediation can be completed in as few or as many meetings as you need.  These can take place over a few months or, in some cases, weeks.  Depending on the issues, some couples are able to come to agreed proposals in just one meeting.

Findings from the Family Mediation Council highlight that agreements are reached in over 70% of cases of couples undergoing mediation.

I have seen repeatedly how mediation helps separating couples to find an agreed way forward in a constructive, positive manner which avoids going to Court, prioritises children’s well-being – and supports the long-term interests of all those involved.

Read more articles by Jones Myers.

About Nicki Mitchell

Nicki is a partner at Jones Myers Family Law Solicitors. With extensive experience in family law, Nicki specialises in the financial aspects of relationship breakdown – and particularly complex cases involving family businesses, multiple properties, and complicated pension arrangements.

Skilled in mediation and collaborative family lawyer, Nicki is also a Child Inclusive Mediator which enables her to meet with children of separated parents and hear what they want for their future.

Family professionals show support for the Family Solutions Group call to end the use of ‘battle’ language and the term ‘custody’ following a family separation. Taking the ‘fight’ out of family separation is long overdue to protect children.
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Call to End the Combative Language of Family Separation, on First Anniversary of No Fault Divorce

Helen Adam
Helen Adam
Chair
Family Solutions Group
  • Family professionals show support for the Family Solutions Group call to end the use of ‘battle’ language and the term ‘custody’ following a family separation. Taking the ‘fight’ out of family separation is long overdue to protect children.
  • Supported by the President of the Family Division, the FSG urges legal professionals to stop using adversarial terms and legal jargon in family separation proceedings.
  • 99% of professionals said the language legal professionals use affects separating clients’ mindsets and their behaviour.
  • 99% of professionals said that small changes in language could make a difference to a child’s experience following their parents’ separation.
  • Professionals say that the biggest obstacles to changing family separation language are habit, and client expectations.

The Family Solutions Group, backed by Sir Andrew McFarlane, President of the Family Division, is calling for a radical change in outdated and combative language used by lawyers, courts, media and wider public in cases of family separation. The call comes on the anniversary of the No Fault Divorce, (Divorce, Dissolution and Separation Act 2020), the biggest shake up in divorce law for more than half a century, which came into force on 6 April 2022, ending the need for separating couples to apportion blame for the breakdown of their marriage, helping them instead to focus on practical decisions involving children or their finances.

Sir Andrew McFarlane, President of the Family Division, addressing a Family Solutions Group event said:

“It’s blindingly obvious that the language we have been using is not appropriate and only goes to stoke the minds of those in a combative mindset, rather than direct them in a different way.”

“…this is not a custody fight, it’s a coming together of parents to work together to reduce the impact on their children and help them resolve their issues about the arrangements for their children, in as low a temperature as possible.”

“And bit by bit the penny is dropping. The language is important. I want to do all I can to bring about a change in the way we use language in the court.”

The Family Solutions Group, set up by Sir Stephen Cobb in 2020, say that battle-stoked language and words like ‘custody’, ‘dispute’ and ‘versus’ can heighten conflict between parents, and can have a long-term negative impact on children caught in the middle. They argue that a simple change in the language of family separation away from adversity and battles, towards safety, wellbeing, and child welfare could improve outcomes for parents and their children.

The Family Solutions Group’s call for change is informed by recent polls of over 400 professionals to find out which words are most harmful and helpful, plus a survey completed by 228 professionals.

  • The Family Solutions Group survey found that a majority (99%) of professionals said that the language legal professionals use affects separating clients’ mindsets and their behaviour, and that small changes in language could affect a child’s experience following their parents’ separation.
  • Professionals were asked whether a move away from legal jargon to plain English in client correspondence and case paperwork could improve outcomes and reduce conflict: 86% strongly agreed and 14% said it might have a positive impact.
  • 98% said that using clients’ first names, rather than words like ‘Applicant’, could also make a difference.
  • Professionals cited the biggest barriers to changing family separation language were: habit 50%, client expectations 22%, vested interests 10% and 5% apathy.
  • Over 400 professionals working with separating families, including mediators, barristers, solicitors, judges, family legal advisors, Cafcass, parent coordinators, relationship therapists, contact centres and clinical psychologists attended three workshops in January, February and March and contributed to polls about language.
  • The words custody, dispute, contact, versus, rights, battle and opponent were thought to be the most harmful and damaging, and their continued use sets the tone for acrimonious parental separation and child arrangements. Specifically, stopping using the word “versus” in court headings, like in the high-profile 1979 Kramer vs. Kramer film, could remove the “battle” element.

The phrase ‘custody’ dates back from another era and is loaded with inappropriate connotations of possession and property.  This was removed from the law by The Children Act 1989 and yet 30 years on it is still widely used across media, social media and by the public.

It’s shocking that harmful terms like ‘custody’ are still commonplace in our society and the media, despite every effort to remove them. The ‘fighting talk’ so often used in the context of family separation sets parents against each other, escalating family problems and putting children at risk.  A ‘custody battle’ suggests a tug of war between parents for the control of their child, with parents pulling against each other. Not only is this 30 years out of date, but it’s harmful to children, unhelpful for parents and ultimately damaging to society.”

In these days of increasing awareness of the impact of language upon minority groups, it is extraordinary that there is such a blind spot over the impact of language on families who separate.  The simple truth is that fuelling aggression and battles between parents increases the risk of harm to their children. Our language should reflect a problem-solving approach rather than stoke the fire of a battle.”

It’s clear from our workshops and survey that it’s time for a major culture shift in our language, as people understand the impact on children. There is now a groundswell of support among family law professionals to dial down their language, replacing adversarial and battle-laden terms with forwards-looking and solutions-focused language.  This is all about protecting child welfare which, under the Children Act, should be our paramount consideration.”

We are grateful to the President of the Family Division for highlighting this important issue and leading the call for change.

The Family Solutions Group is marshalling widespread support across all family legal sectors in calling for the end to the use of unnecessary hostile and combative language in family separation.

About Helen

Helen read law at Cambridge and qualified as a solicitor in 1990. Her legal career started with a leading private client practise in London, and she then moved to a High Street practise to broaden her experience. Following a career break she decided not to return to work as a solicitor, limited to representing one parent, and in 2007 retrained as a mediator. She is a founding Partner of Wells Family Mediation and works with clients online, and in person in Tunbridge Wells and Central London.

Helen is one of the foundation trainers for the Family Mediators’ Association and also a Professional Practise Consultant and a Child Consultant. She is an advocate of bringing the voice of the child into mediation and expects age-appropriate children to be offered the opportunity to be consulted.

She promotes an integrated approach to mediation and, as well as working with other professionals within mediation, encourages her clients to seek legal, financial, personal or parenting support outside of the mediation meetings.

Helen is also involved with family policy work. She was the mediator representative on the Private Law Working Group and in 2020, was invited to set up and chair the Family Solutions Group. It’s report “What About Me?“, focusing on the needs of the child following family separation, was published later that year. Helen continues to chair the Family Solutions Group and their paper “Language Matters” was published in September 2022.

Helen is a regular speaker on the need to reframe support for families following separation to be less adversarial and more child-focussed. She delivered the John Cornwell memorial lecture at the Family Mediators’ Association Conference in 2021, and the Bridget Lindley memorial lecture at the Family Justice Council Conference in 2022.

Helen was awarded ‘Family Mediator of the Year’ and ‘Child-Inclusive Mediator of the Year’ at the National Mediation Awards in 2022.

Helen’s clear and unshakeable professional goal is to support parents, where safe to do so, to handle their separation in a way which enables them to cooperate as parents for the years ahead, to the lasting benefit of their children.

how is money distributed following divorce

Length of Marriage – How is Money Distributed Following Divorce

Katie McCann
Katie McCann
Head of Family Law and in-house counsel at Kuits Solicitors

Family law calls for quite a lot of mathematics. From calculating how matrimonial finances should be divided upon divorce, to considering the tax implications of the same, a lot of number crunching goes on.

Here, Head of Family for Kuits Katie McCann, who specialises in complex matrimonial finances, explains how a good divorce lawyer needs to be well-versed in the calculations that are necessary to ensure a fair settlement is reached for their client.

How is money distributed following divorce?

When dealing with finances after a marriage has broken down, parties must disclose their financial situations so that the ‘total available pot’ can be calculated. After this, each party’s circumstances must be considered so that finances can be divided in a way that takes care of their needs at the same time as being fair.

In the famous case of White v White (1 All ER 1) Lord Nicholls introduced the ‘yardstick of equality’ and explained that, as a general rule when it comes to dividing finances, equality should only be departed from if there is a good reason for doing so.

In order to consider what would represent a fair division of assets, judges will be guided be S25 Matrimonial Causes Act 1973. Amongst other considerations such as the standard of living enjoyed by the family prior to the breakdown of the marriage, each parties’ income and earning capacity moving forward, judges must give thought to the duration of the marriage.

Does the length of the marriage affect the way money is distributed?

The significance of the length of a party’s marriage was highlighted in the case of Sharp v Sharp (EWCA Civ 408), in which Mrs Sharp claimed that the £10.5million bonus payments that she had accrued during the marriage should be protected. Mr and Mrs Sharp had no children, earned similar incomes and, most importantly, had only been married for four years. Based on the facts of the case, the Court of Appeal reduced Mr Sharp’s initial award from £2.7million down to £2million, thus highlighting that equality is more likely to be departed from when a marriage has been short-lived.

As a result, it is now more important than ever for family lawyers to be able to advise their clients whether a marriage is likely to be considered ‘long’ or ‘short’ by the Court. As there is no definitive guidance on this topic each case must be decided on its own facts and this is where things start to get tricky.

Does cohabitation affect the court’s view of the length of a marriage?

The case of GW v RW (EWHC 611) makes it clear that if a couple’s cohabitation moves seamlessly into marriage, such cohabitation must be considered when calculating the length of the marriage. Using a worked example to illustrate the importance of this guidance, in the event a couple have cohabited for 15 years and then are married for just three, this marriage is most likely going to be defined as long. This is extremely significant, as we know that a long marriage is likely to result in finances being divided equally between the parties.

Based on the above, you would be forgiven for thinking that 15 years of cohabitation but no marriage would grant both parties an equal split. However, there is no such thing as common law marriage in the UK. A couple could have lived together for 30 years or more, but the absence of a marriage certificate means their entitlements are limited in the event the relationship breaks down.

This is where our current laws start to become illogical: either cohabitation is worth something or it is not. It cannot be fair that a cohabitation of 10 years followed by a short marriage will result in an equal split, but a 30-year cohabitation with no marriage is worth nothing at all.

With more and more couples choosing to cohabit, something has to change. If logic is to be worth anything at all, then either long-term cohabitation should result in an equal financial division following separation, or cohabitation should not be considered when calculating the length of a marriage. At the moment the maths simply doesn’t add up.

Click here for more articles by Katie McCann

ABOUT KATIE

Katie McCann is head of family law and in-house counsel at Kuits Solicitors in Manchester City Centre. She has a special interest in resolving high value relationship breakdown disputes.

Going Through Divorce? Think Before you Speak.

If you’re Going Through Divorce, Think Before you Speak (or Post)!

Lauren Jodrell
Family Solicitor

When going through a divorce or trying to agree amicable child arrangements, we appreciate that you need to talk to family and friends to gain their support and understanding.

This is perfectly acceptable so long as those you confide in understand the importance of privacy in family law proceedings.

Keeping matters private in these circumstances is very important.

Where the family court is involved, airing your dirty laundry in public is never a good idea because of the potential harm it could do to your case. This includes discussing details of your case on social media, such as Facebook or Twitter.

Who can I discuss my case with?

Obviously you can discuss your case with your legal team and with anyone appointed to help you try to resolve matters amicably, such as a family law mediator.

When you go to court about a family matter, the judge in charge will usually only allow you and a handful of other interested people to be involved in the proceedings and to have sight of any relevant court papers and reports.

If you are getting divorced, it is likely that only you, your former spouse and your respective solicitors, barristers and court-authorised experts will be allowed to participate in the proceedings.

In cases involving children, permission may also be given for social workers and other professionals to become involved, as well as someone from the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (CAFCASS) appointed to look after the interests of your children.

You may also be permitted to have a support worker in attendance.  For example, if you have been a victim of domestic abuse you may have someone from Women’s Aid with you.

It is perfectly acceptable to discuss your case with anyone who is involved in the negotiations to resolve the family matter in hand.

Who shouldn’t I discuss my case with?

Family and Friends

Family and friends may be your main source of support during court proceedings so sharing and discussing certain matters is acceptable, but you must not mention anything to them that the court has specifically told you not to discuss and under no circumstances must you show them any court papers or reports.

Social Media

Posting  to social media platforms is an absolute no. This is also something that friends and family need to understand.

Not only will they attract disapproval from the judge, they could also amount to contempt of court if you reveal confidential or sensitive information. This is also likely to aggravate what will already be a difficult situation.

Personal attacks about the character of your former spouse, or the competency of the professionals involved in the case, could also be libellous and result in civil proceedings and a claim for compensation being brought against you.

Press and Media

During court proceedings for divorce or child arrangements, members of the press will be excluded to protect your privacy. It is highly advisable not to speak to press or magazines about your issue whilst court proceedings are in progress.

This may sound like advice for only the rich and famous but many magazines are interested in the stories of ‘ordinary folk’ but this is not something that should be explored until your matter is resolved.

Will details of my case be reported in the press?

Journalists are not allowed to attend court to hear cases concerning children.  They are, however, allowed to attend to hear other types of case, such as those concerning financial arrangements following divorce.

Unless yours is a particularly unusual or interesting case that has the potential to change or clarify the law on a particular matter, or you happen to be a high-profile individual or celebrity, it is unlikely that the press will be interested in attending court to hear your case or subsequently report on it.

Occasionally, the court may give permission for cases to be reported in circumstances where the proceedings would usually have been private.  This may happen, for example, where publicity is needed to help locate a child who has been abducted or where there is significant public interest in a case and everyone involved agrees that it should be reported on.

Click here for more articles by Grindeys Solicitors

ABOUT LAUREN

Lauren Jodrell is a solicitor who deals with all areas of family law, including divorce, financial negotiation and matters relating to children. She was trained and qualified in a Birmingham based firm, however, she was raised in Stoke on Trent and was keen to return to her roots and so joined the family law team at Grindeys in 2015.

She prides herself on being friendly and approachable as her clients are often going through a very difficult time in their life. She also appreciates the need to deal with matters as swiftly and as cost effectively as possible.

Her aim is to try and settle matters out of court, as this is cheaper and less traumatic for the disputing parties, but should your matter need court intervention you can rest assured that Lauren’s keen interest in advocacy will see you well represented.

Lauren is a member of both the Law Society and Resolution. Membership of both organisations requires a high level of continuous professional development and a commitment to exceptional client care.

Email: Lauren.Jodrell@grindeys.com

Website: family-law-and-divorce.co.uk

– Feature Photo by William Iven on Unsplash

top 10 articles to help start the divorce process.

Top 10 Articles to Help Start the Divorce Process

If you’re currently considering filing for a divorce or are just at the start of the divorce process, here are some articles that we believe will help you along the way.

The Divorce Magazine has several accessible, informative and essential legal articles that will help start the divorce process and beyond.  The vast majority of our articles are authored by qualified divorce professionals who are always willing to speak with you should you have any questions.

The most common question we get is from those of you who have lost your original marriage certificate and are wondering how to get a divorce without a marriage certificate; here are two articles that may help:  Can I get Divorced Without my Lost Marriage Certificate UK? and Lost your Marriage Certificate?

Again, if you have any questions on how to start the divorce process without your marriage certificate, please do get in touch with the solicitors who have contributed the articles. We are sure they will be able to help you.

Here are links to Top 10 Articles to Help Start the Divorce Process:

  1. How the Divorce Process Works
  2. What are the Grounds for Divorce in the UK?
  3. How to get Divorced – The Divorce Papers
  4. What Is The Average Cost Of Divorce?
  5. Pension Sharing on Divorce
  6. What is a Financial Order and why you MUST get one
  7. Can I get an Online Divorce?
  8. Divorce Proceedings and Financial Applications Uncoupled
  9. Family Mediation Definition and What to Expect
  10. What you need to know about Collaborative Divorce 

It is often said that January is the “Divorce Season”, whether this is the case on not truly depends on whom you ask, but here is an article on “Six-step Formula to Surviving the ‘Divorce Season

The Divorce Magazine is all about helping couples going through divorce, as well as those going through separation, do so in the most amicable, cost effective way. We will therefore, never publish any article that we deem to be encouraging acrimony between couples or encouraging harmful behaviour during the divorce or separation process.

If you are stuck in any way and are unsure which way to turn, please do get in touch and we will try and direct you to the right person or people.  Or you could have a look through our The Divorce Magazine Directory.

All the Best!

Photo by Zoriana Stakhniv on Unsplash

What Can Brexit Teach Us About Divorce?

What Can Brexit Teach Us About Divorce?

Natalie Jenner
Head of Divorce and Family Law at Parslows

If you’re currently going through a divorce, you’re not alone.

The entire population of the UK and the rest of the EU are going through the same thing. With a divorce bill and even divorce papers, Brexit is often talked about in terms of divorce. As such, it’s worth asking what the split between the UK and the EU can teach us about the dissolution of marriages.

1. The Decision Can Be Sudden, But The Process Can Take Years

The UK has always had something of an internal conflict about whether or not it wants to be part of the EU. However, on 24th June 2016, a slim enough majority of the voting public decided that the relationship had run its course, and that was that.

The decision came out of nowhere, leaving the rest of the EU “stunned”, but the process of actually handling the divorce has been a long and drawn out affair. Even with the agreement to “accelerate” Brexit talks, it’ll still be 2019 before the UK leaves the EU — almost three years after it voted to do so.

The decision to get divorced can also come out of nowhere, leaving many people as “stunned” as the EU were, but the process can also be convoluted. Between getting your decree nisi and your decree absolute, a divorce can take a whole year to fully complete.

Of course, the decision only appears “sudden” from the side that’s not expecting it. From the other side, it’s a decision which has had a lot of thought put into it…

2. Only One Half of the Relationship Needs to Be Unhappy

Divorce isn’t always a mutual decision. It’s perfectly possible for one person to be happily married while their partner is thinking of whether or not to leave them. This is why people can be surprised by a divorce, even if the signs have been there for years.

Brexit is also a perfect example of this. The EU had no intentions of kicking the UK out, but the UK has been considering leaving the EU for a long, long time.

3. Divorce Doesn’t Need to Be Expensive

The negotiations between the UK and the EU came to a standstill when the issue of the “divorce bill” stopped both sides from reaching an agreement on anything. On the one hand, there is the reported €75 billion the UK owes the EU once it leaves. On the other hand, there is the apparent €10 billion the EU owes the UK once it leaves.

While no divorce in the history of divorces has ever been that expensive, some famous settlements have been pretty eye-watering. Of course, a divorce doesn’t need to cost that much. If the EU and the UK could settle their differences, the figure could be a lot smaller. In much the same way, joint asset valuations are a great way of coming to a compromise both ex-partners can agree on.

4. Public Divorces Are Messy

For the UK and the EU, a public divorce is the only option. The results are not pretty.

The news media is constantly churning out stories about how Brexit negotiations are going. The worse it looks, and the more disputes each side have, the more news it generates.

However, all of this is a necessary evil in the name of free speech. The public doesn’t want to be shielded from the ugliness of the negotiations. They want to know every detail and it is the duty of the news media to tell them about every detail.

By contrast, if you have children, the last thing you want is a messy, public divorce.

For most parents, the ideal way to handle the situation is to keep it out of the courts and to keep everything private. In short, you do want to shield your children from the ugliness of it all. So, be civil, be discreet, and remember: once upon a time, you both loved each other.

About Natalie

Natalie Jenner is the Head of Divorce and Family Law at Parslows. She specialises in dealing with civil partnership dissolutions, financial settlements, child issues, wills, and divorces as well as many other family legal matters.

Managing your Finances after Divorce

Managing your Finances after Divorce

Claire Trundley
Partner HCB Solicitors

There is no doubt that experiencing a divorce can turn your life upside down, both emotionally and financially. For many, it is a devastating and traumatic event that can be messy, protracted and expensive.

Managing your finances after a divorce can, therefore, be an overwhelming and daunting task, leaving you uncertain and anxious about your future, especially if your household income has taken a huge hit.

For some, however, this change in circumstances can be liberating, presenting the perfect opportunity to take back control and achieve financial independence.

Here are 6 top tips to help you get your post-divorce finances back on track.

Prepare a Budget & Plan of Action

Having a budget and financial plan of action in place is key to managing your finances after you divorce.

  • Keep good records of your income and expenses
  • Check the benefits you may be entitled to now that you have separated, such as reduced council tax, adjustments to tax credits or child benefit.
  • Collect statements of all your outgoing expenses such as rent/mortgage, utilities etc.
  • Aim to identify and eliminate any unnecessary expenditure.
  • Identify where any savings and investments can be made.
  • Think about financial planning with your future in mind and the ways in which you will fund your retirement.
  • Think carefully about the long-term affordability of staying in the matrimonial home and the financial consequences of taking on a whole mortgage by yourself, especially if it is going to over stretch you financially.
  • Consider the benefits of downsizing to a smaller property with smaller mortgage and running costs.
  • Consider opting for a share of your partner’s pension rather than focusing entirely on the property you share.

Review Bank Accounts

It is a good idea to cut all financial ties with your ex as soon as possible.

  • Contact your bank to protect any joint bank accounts that you share with your ex. You will want to prevent your ex from emptying or closing accounts or running up any overdraft facility that you will be liable for. You might want to consider closing joint accounts or putting a freeze on them until you and your ex can agree on how to manage things, going forward. Get in touch with your bank and they will be able to advise you on the best course of action to take.
  • Secure your online banking by changing passwords and PIN codes that your ex might know or can easily guess.
  • Close any joint savings accounts and split the assets
  • Open a separate bank account in your name only, so payments can be made directly to you.

Deal with Debts

Making an effort to pay off debts is a sensible way to secure your personal finance going forward.

  • Cancel any joint bank credit cards. Try to reach an agreement with your ex on any outstanding balances and have agreed amounts transferred to new cards in your separate names.
  • Deal with outstanding debts that are in your name. You will be responsible for all debts in your name, even joint debts.
  • Let your lenders know that you have separated or divorced.
  • Communicate with your lenders to let them know if you are experiencing any problems with loan repayments so they can help you with a plan going forward.
  • Seek specialist financial counselling to help you put a plan in place to deal with any debt issues.

Save More

Investing in a savings account is a good way of creating finance to fall back on should unexpected expenses arise further down the line.

  • Allocate a regular portion of your income to your savings which will help you to avoid falling into debt and help protect your financial future.

Sort Mortgage, Rent & Utilities

Taking charge of your mortgage, rent and utilities will help protect the roof over your head.

  • Inform your lender that you and your partner have separated and work out a plan to ensure that mortgage repayments are covered.
  • If you are renting, let your agent or landlord know of your separation and have the lease put in your name only. Again, work out a plan to ensure that rent payments are covered. If you intend to move out of a rented property, let your agent or landlord know and have yourself removed from the lease.  You may also want to remove your name from the utilities for the property.
  • If you are staying in your property, ensure that all utility bills are in your sole name. If you are moving, ensure your name is removed from the utility bills for that property.

Make or Update Your Will

  • If you haven’t made a Will, now would be a good time to visit a solicitor and make one so that your exact wishes are known and adhered to. This is especially important if you have children that you are responsible for. Doing this will give you the opportunity to decide how you want your assets divided and who will be appointed guardians of your children.  If you have already made a Will, you may want to update it or make a new one that matches your new circumstances.
  • If you have a Power of Attorney in place you may want to review it and ensure that it is updated now that you have divorced.

About Claire 

Claire graduated in 1990 and joined HCB’s Bedford office in 1993; she was made a Partner in 1997.

She has always worked in family law dealing with children (private law), divorce, injunctions, financial matters and separation. She is an accredited specialist of Resolution (formerly known as SFLA) and a trained Collaborative lawyer.

Arguing Causes More Damage than Divorce in Children

Arguing Causes More Damage than Divorce in Children, New Study Reveals

Kerry Smith
Kerry Smith
Head of Family Law
at K J Smith

In the lead up to a divorce, those parents who argue are causing their child to develop at a slower rate in comparison to the actual divorce according to new research.

It has been found that a lot of the damage caused to children as a result of divorce is down to the arguing that occurs before the parents separate.

The research, carried out by the University of Yorkshire studied the data of 19,000 children who were born in 2000 and it identified that there are behavioural problems, hyperactivity and emotional development in those children of divorced parents who argued prior to the divorce being finalised.

Therefore, the research identified that children of divorced parents have reduced cognitive and non-cognitive skills when compared to those children who are not exposed to divorcing parents although the divorce itself is not the main reason for this.

A lot of the damage is caused by the circumstances prior to the divorce as well as the characteristics linked to the family. This could be down to many of those families having a lower education as well as struggling financially or they could have regular conflicts. The conflicts between parents could therefore, harm the development of a child more than the separation itself.

Those children that have separated parents have behavioural development problems that are 30% worse than those children who come from families that remain intact.

In England and Wales, the number of divorces occurring is on the increase. The majority of these divorces involve children who are below the age of 16 while 66% of them include children under the age of 11.

When it comes to helping children who are involved in a divorce, there are a number of things that parents can do to ensure they are affected as little as possible. Children are simply children and so, they do not need to see any conflict or discussions. These should take place at a time when the children are not around.

Children also benefit from a routine, this means it is important to keep any routine that they may have.

Any disruption can cause them problems so continue to take them to school or pick them up at the same time, visit grandparents in the way they do and if they take part in an activity during the week, continue the arrangement.

In addition to this, negativity can also have a detrimental impact on their development. They do not need to see or feel the negativity from the parents as this will also impact them.

Regardless of any problems between parents, the children still need them as parents so it is important that they continue to be involved in their lives.

It is now believed that the research could assist Government interventions in a positive way so that parents can be educated in a way that will allow them to understand how they could be having a negative influence on the way in which their child develops.

The results show that those interventions that are intended to enhance co-operation as well as those interventions that ensure parents are aware of how negative conflict can be could help to reduce the number of divorces which will help to improve the non-cognitive skills of children.

About Kerry

Kerry Smith is the head of family law at K J Smith Solicitors, a specialist family law firm who deal with a wide range of issues including divorce, domestic violence, civil partnerships and prenuptial agreements.

 

Going through Divorce in Court

Going through Divorce in Court

Women and Divorce
Wendi Schuller
Author of
The Global Guide to Divorce

Some spouses may want to have a judge decide their fate and choose litigation.

Others may disagree on issues and do not want to negotiate with each other.

Or a judge receiving paperwork may have some questions and concerns, requiring one hearing with the spouses and their solicitors.

There can be one or two hearings with a settlement, or a series, leading up to the expensive final hearing with barristers on their team. Solicitors can send documents to the court without their clients ever having to appear.

The county court is the one that deals with the majority of divorces and separations. Children’s issues must be in the court in the jurisdiction where they live.

The High Court is used in cases of extreme wealth, more complex ones, or when one or both parties are foreign born.  The Magistrate Court handles a case with a criminal charge, such as domestic abuse.  The Crown Court deals with serious cases that require a trial by jury.

In Scotland, the Sheriff’s Court hears divorce and civil cases.

If going to court, your solicitor might get a barrister to represent you. The cases of extreme wealth are heard in the Court of Sessions in Edinburgh. In Northern Ireland, the High Court hears most of the divorce cases. Their Magistrate Court deals with removing an abusive family member from the home.

The judge will get input from Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (Cafcass) when assessing child arrangements.

Cafcass are officers of the court who focus on the children’s wants and needs. They interview the parents, children, and other people in the children’s lives, such as teachers or coaches. Talking to these people gives a picture of parenting interactions and hands on care.

They share the results of their findings with the judge, so he can make an informed decision on shared custody. Post-divorce a parent may return to court for a child’s issue that is not working out well. Cafcass can evaluate if shared time needs to be tweaked and get the child’s input on the arrangement before reporting to the judge

In most cases in the UK, parents decide on shared custody and do not leave it to a judge’s decision. A judge can issue a Residence Order stating with which parent a child will reside, or what percentage of time. Contact Order is the amount of time that the non-resident parent can see their child. A Specific Order is about one particular issue, such as which school that the child will attend.

Divorce Court Hearings

Pre-trial hearing: The judge has already perused the spouses’ information and can guide them to an agreement. He can urge the spouses to come to a settlement.

Both solicitors may want to settle in just one hearing with smaller details, such as who is responsible for paying the mortgage during divorce proceedings.

After Cafcass gives a report to the judge, the solicitors may want the spouses to come to terms on child arrangements in this more informal setting. It is expensive to have a Final Hearing with barristers representing each spouse in court.

If one requires financial support during the divorce, petition the court for an Earlier Interim hearing. Financial information is supplied and an arrangement for temporary maintenance is enacted that will last throughout the divorce proceedings.

The First Directions Appointment (FDA) is approximately two weeks after the paperwork is sent to court.

The spouses go before a judge and their solicitors tell him the issues. He gives directions determining the course to take which will resolve the major problems. The judge shows what the gaps are in the evidence presented and sets the time frame for future hearings.

This quick session outlines the case and gives directives to be accomplished before meeting again. If compromises are made following this hearing, they are sent to the judge and it may not be necessary for another session.

Financial Dispute Resolution Appointment (FDR) is after following the judge’s directives, and is the second appearance. Both sides have given full disclosure with Form E and this is a way to settle financial differences with the judge’s input.

The prime directive is to see if spouses can compromise on this dispute without resorting to a formal hearing.

In this informal session, the judge gives an idea on what the outcome of the case could be based upon the papers submitted to the court. This particular judge is not allowed to preside over the final hearing, so conversations are quite candid and informative. If a resolution is not met, then the case may end up in a full hearing.

Once an agreement is reached, the court can make it legally binding through a Consent Order after the Decree Nisi.

If this agreement is made outside of court, a solicitor can draw up this legal document which finalizes financial matters between you both. You can even do this without a solicitor using the county clerk’s help with information and how to do this order.

Final Hearing   

Before the final hearing, the solicitors agree upon the documents submitted to the judge in what is called a ‘’bundle’’, labelled with the court date.

The petitioner’s solicitor or barrister goes first and summarizes the case for the judge. She then gives evidence stating why the petitioner is asking for what she is. Witnesses are called and the respondent’s barrister cross examines them.

The Respondent’s barrister gives his side of the case and then calls his witnesses. The petitioner’s barrister cross examines these witnesses.

Expensive expert witnesses may be employed by both sides. These include psychologists, doctors, or forensic accountants who charge by the hour. Cafcass may also be presenting the results of interviews.

The judge will be looking at any prenuptial agreements and if they are fair. He will look at the case in its entirety. Closing arguments are given by the barristers. The judge may give a ruling at the end. A solicitor will apply for the Decree Absolute and the divorce ends most likely with great expense.

ABOUT WENDI

Wendi Schuller is a nurse, hypnotherapist and is certified in Neuro-linguistic Programing (NLP).

Her most recent book is The Global Guide to Divorce and she has over 200 published articles.

She is a guest on radio programs in the US and UK. Her website is globalguidetodivorce.com.

What Is The Average Cost Of Divorce?

What Is The Average Cost Of Divorce?

Henry Crisp
Founding Partner
Crisp & Co.

If you’re considering going through a divorce, often one of the biggest worries will be the overall cost associated with the process. After all, divorce has always been famous for its price tag. But what does the price entail?

Aviva estimates the overall cost of a divorce at nearly £44,000 – or £21,979 per partner to be precise. That seems like a whopping amount.

However, the cost of legal fees per person on average makes up just £1,280 of that total. So what are the other costs associated with divorce? According to the research by Aviva, setting up a new home, arranging childcare and even post-separation holidays are among the secondary costs frequently cited by divorcing couples.

In our recent infographic, “What Is The Cost Of Divorce?” we break down the average cost of a divorce as well as providing some top tips for protecting your assets and ensuring the best outcome for you and your family.

What are the Costs?

For any divorce, you will need to apply for a divorce petition and pay the court fee – this is currently £550.

It is highly advisable to instruct a solicitor to help you through your divorce, and the solicitor’s fees will be on top of the court fee.

The bulk of the financial upheaval associated with divorce will be down to the division of assets. This doesn’t necessarily need to be done by a judge in court: there are various forms of alternative dispute resolution available, such as mediation.

In a mediation session, you and your partner will sit down with an impartial mediator who will guide the negotiations. If you and your partner cannot agree on a settlement, it will be the role of the judge to decide how assets are split.

 How are Assets Divided?

There are few set rules regarding who gets what in a divorce. Usually, assets acquired during the marriage (often known as ‘marital assets’) are considered as the property of both partners and put into the divorce pot to be divided up.  This includes:

  • Property
  • Earnings/pension acquired through work
  • Business and investments
  • Money

When deciding how to fairly divide up these assets between the divorcing couple, the judge will take into consideration a number of factors:

  • Whether there are any children
  • Whether a pre-nuptial or post-nuptial agreement exists
  • The length of the marriage
  • Future income and financial needs of both parties
  • New relationships (e.g. if one person has started a new relationship and is living in their new partner’s home)

However, every divorce settlement is decided on its own merits, and no two situations are the same. The judge has discretionary powers and will ultimately make the call on what is fair.

About Henry

Henry Crisp qualified as a solicitor in 1992 and has specialised in the practice of all aspects of Family Law since then.

Henry is a founding Partner of Crisp & Co.  As well as being a qualified Mediator, Henry is also a member of Resolution and is trained and practised in Collaborative Law.

 

 

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