When I was nine years old our family got divorced. I say it this way because in one day our American stepmother moved back to Texas with our younger brother and sister. Overnight, dad found himself the solo caretaker of my sister
He had a closet full of secrets and now I had to move forward alone. My whole marriage had been a threesome or more unbeknownst to me. His rationale-family life was never impacted because what he did outside the family home did
Toward the end of the second decade of my marriage, he surprised me with a 40th birthday party. My underlying thought from that night was that he must really love me. I could not understand why I might have doubted him. It is
Emotional abuse is silent and unseen. There’s no visible scars or bruising because the pain is all inside you. It is no less painful because it is invisible. It happens behind closed doors, in private with few witnesses. For me, it all
My good friend has kindly consented to sharing two journal entries from the years after his marriage breakdown. He keeps this journal for his son to read as an adult. As a renowned professional in his field, this piece is at one
There it was, Pat’s name tucked under the most recent obituaries in the local newspaper. Her name, short list of relatives, loved her dog, and a successful career as a social worker. Nowhere in the obituary did it say she saved lives.
The sun is warm on my cheeks, my long hair is twirling in the wind, and I am smiling. The new summer grass is prickling my bare legs as I adjusted my skirt beneath me. The small grassy hill is lumpy and
I was married to a liar for 25 years. At a very personal level, I have first-hand knowledge of the devastation lying creates in people’s lives. I know that liars can be clever, charming, smug, and thoroughly convincing. Scott Peck, in People
Twenty years after my divorce, I can remember — vividly — the books that saved me during those early days of finding my way alone. Each book gave me something- the language, hope, and understanding- to help me process the trauma. Millions
Have you ever heard of someone who has made the statement like “I wish I could have had this or that but it’s not going to happen for me?” In the early stages of divorce I would look at married couples and
Who knew that grand-parenting would be so much fun? Who knew I’d be a solo grandma? It was understood in my marriage that somewhere in the future we would be very proud grandparents together. However, like many baby boomers, our marriage didn’t
This year, 2016, is officially 20 years after my marriage breakup. For those of us who grew up in the 1950s, we thought the future would be much like our parents. We married, had families, but then, unlike our parents, many of
On Golden Pond clinched it. We watched it, cried through the credits and saw ourselves years in the future. He, the crotchety Henry Fonda, and me, the delightfully aged Katharine Hepburn — opening the cottage each spring. We’d remark on all the