coping with divorce finances

Looking Beyond the Settlement: Why Financial Planning Matters Early in Divorce

Looking Beyond the Settlement: Why Financial Planning Matters Early in Divorce

Published on
Damion Keyworth
Damion Keyworth
Financial Advisor
Perspective Financial Group Limited

Separation and divorce are among life’s biggest transitions. Alongside the emotional challenges come important decisions about your home, your finances and your future.

Over the years, I’ve had the privilege of helping many people navigate this journey. One thing I’ve seen time and again is that the earlier financial planning becomes part of the conversation, the more confidence people have in the decisions they make.

Many people understandably begin by speaking to a family solicitor. Legal advice is essential, but financial planning can add another valuable perspective by helping answer a simple question:

“Will the decisions I make today still work for me five, ten or twenty years from now?”

Looking Beyond the Numbers

A financial settlement may appear fair on paper, but that doesn’t always mean it will provide long-term financial security.

Two people may leave a marriage with assets of a similar value yet experience very different financial futures depending on their income, housing costs, pensions, tax position, childcare responsibilities and retirement plans.

This is where financial planning can make a real difference.

Rather than focusing solely on how assets are divided, we look at how those assets will support your life in the years ahead. Using cashflow forecasting, we can model different settlement options and explore what they might mean over the long term.

For example, it’s perfectly understandable that someone may wish to remain in the family home because it offers stability during an uncertain time. However, careful planning may show that maintaining the property could place pressure on future income or retirement plans. Equally, pension arrangements that seem reasonable today may have unintended consequences later in life.

Having this insight before decisions are finalised allows people to make informed choices with greater confidence.

Working Together for Better Outcomes

In my experience, the best outcomes happen when financial planning is introduced alongside legal advice rather than after most of the important decisions have already been made.

Family solicitors play a vital role in helping clients achieve a fair legal settlement. Mortgage advisers help assess borrowing options and affordability. Divorce coaches provide invaluable emotional support throughout what is often a very difficult period.

A financial planner brings these conversations together by considering how each decision affects your long-term financial wellbeing.

It’s not about replacing the expertise of other professionals. It’s about complementing it.

Bringing the Future into Focus

One of the most valuable tools available during divorce is cashflow forecasting.

Instead of focusing only on today’s assets, it allows you to see how your finances may develop over the next five, ten or even twenty years.

It can help answer questions such as:

  • Will my income be enough?
  • Can I realistically afford to keep my home?
  • When will my pensions become available?
  • How might inflation affect my future spending?
  • Will I have enough to enjoy the retirement I want?

Sometimes the analysis provides reassurance that a proposed settlement is sustainable. On other occasions, it highlights areas that may benefit from further discussion before agreements are finalised.

Either way, it gives people greater clarity at a time when certainty can feel in short supply.

A Collaborative Approach

One aspect of my work that I particularly enjoy is working alongside other professionals who support people through separation and divorce.

I regularly attend a local networking group where family solicitors, mortgage advisers, divorce coaches and other specialists come together to share knowledge and discuss how we can improve the experience for the people we all support.

Those conversations reinforce something I strongly believe: no single professional sees the whole picture.

When advisers work collaboratively, clients benefit from clearer communication, fewer unexpected issues and advice that considers both the immediate settlement and the life that follows.

After all, divorce isn’t simply a legal process. It’s the beginning of a new financial chapter.

About Damion Keyworth

I help people make confident, well-informed financial decisions so they can live the lifestyle they want — not just when they retire, but throughout life.

My approach:
• Listen carefully to your goals and priorities
• Clarify your current financial position
• Explore the lifestyle you have today and the one you want tomorrow
• Create a clear financial plan to bridge the gap
• Review regularly so the plan keeps working as life changes

“It’s not all about the money — it’s about lifestyle. Doing the things you want to do while you’re fit and healthy enough to do them.”

Only once we’ve understood your life and goals do we consider whether financial products are needed to support the plan.

I also specialise in financial planning around separation and divorce. Having written “Financial Planning & Divorce”, I understand how complex pensions, assets, and lifestyle choices become during this time.

My aim is to work collaboratively with solicitors, mediators, and other professionals to ensure clients make informed financial decisions at every stage of the process. If this is an area where you’d like support — whether as a client or a professional partner — please feel free to connect.

I’m a Pension/Retirement Specialist with over 20 years’ experience, a member of the CII, CISI and Resolution. Backed by Perspective Financial Group — one of the UK’s leading national financial planning and wealth management firms with 36 offices and 450+ staff — I bring both local understanding and national expertise.

You only get one life. Let’s make it count.

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Divorce is Rarely About Just One Thing
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Divorce is Rarely About Just One Thing

Published on
Anthony Davis
Anthony Davis
Founder and Director
By Personal Touch

One of the most common misconceptions about divorce is that it is a single event. People often think of it as completing a form, obtaining a Final Order, and then moving on with life. In reality, those of us who work with separating couples every day know that divorce is rarely that simple. More often than not, the legal ending of a marriage is just one part of a much wider journey that affects finances, housing, children, future planning, and sometimes a person’s confidence in making decisions about the next chapter of their life. 

At By Personal Touch, we speak to hundreds of people every year who are at very different stages of that journey. Some contact us within days of a separation, feeling overwhelmed and unsure where to begin. Others have already spent months trying to resolve matters themselves and simply need help formalising an agreement. Some are facing court proceedings and need practical support to navigate a process they never imagined they would have to understand. What unites almost all of them is the feeling that they have been dropped into unfamiliar territory and are trying to make important life decisions without a map. 

It is often only when we begin talking through their circumstances that they realise divorce is not simply about obtaining a divorce. There are usually several important decisions that sit behind the legal process itself. Questions arise about the family home, pensions, savings, debts, arrangements for children, future inheritance planning, and the practical realities of building a new life after separation. Whilst every family’s circumstances are different, the same themes appear time and time again. 

Many couples who come to us have already managed to reach some form of agreement. They have had difficult conversations around the kitchen table, exchanged countless messages, and eventually found a way forward that feels fair to both of them. There is often a sense of relief when that point is reached. The conflict has reduced, communication has improved, and both individuals feel ready to move on. Yet one of the most important lessons we have learned over the years is that reaching an agreement is not necessarily the end of the process. In many ways, it is the beginning of ensuring that agreement is properly protected. 

A significant part of our work involves helping couples formalise financial settlements through Financial Consent Orders. Whilst this may sound like a technical legal process, the reality is that it is often about providing certainty. People who have worked hard to negotiate a settlement want reassurance that the agreement they have reached will stand the test of time. They want confidence that future financial claims have been properly addressed and that both parties can move forward without the fear of unexpected disputes years down the line. The value of that certainty should never be underestimated. Divorce is emotionally exhausting enough without leaving important financial matters unresolved. 

What often surprises people is that many of the most successful outcomes do not originate in a courtroom. They begin with a conversation. Mediation has become an increasingly important part of helping families navigate separation because it provides a structured environment in which people can discuss difficult issues constructively. There is a common misconception that mediation is only suitable for couples who get along well. In practice, we often see the opposite. Some individuals arrive frustrated, hurt, and convinced that agreement is impossible. Yet when provided with the right environment and support, many are able to have conversations that simply were not possible around the kitchen table. 

The reason mediation can be so effective is that it encourages people to focus on solutions rather than positions. Instead of concentrating on who is right and who is wrong, the discussion shifts towards what arrangements are needed for the future. This can be particularly valuable where children are involved. Whilst the marriage may have come to an end, the responsibilities of parenting continue long after the legal process is complete. Creating a framework for constructive communication can often prove more valuable than any court order. 

Of course, not every case can be resolved through agreement alone. There are situations where communication has broken down completely, where important financial information has not been disclosed, or where significant disputes exist regarding children or finances. When matters progress to court, many people find themselves entering a world that feels intimidating and confusing. The family justice system has its own procedures, language, expectations, and deadlines. For someone who has never previously been involved in legal proceedings, the experience can feel overwhelming. 

This is where practical litigation support becomes so important. One of the most rewarding aspects of our work is helping people understand the process they are facing. Fear often stems from uncertainty. When individuals understand what documents are required, what a hearing is likely to involve, and what steps come next, they are usually able to approach proceedings with far greater confidence. Whilst nobody chooses to find themselves involved in litigation, having guidance and support can make the experience significantly less daunting. 

Yet even once financial settlements have been agreed, mediation concluded, and court proceedings finalised, another stage of the journey often remains. Separation frequently creates significant changes in a person’s financial and personal circumstances. A family home may need to be sold or transferred. A new property may be purchased. Existing Wills may no longer reflect an individual’s wishes. Beneficiaries may need to be reconsidered, and future plans properly documented. 

It is remarkable how often people devote months to resolving their divorce but overlook the practical steps needed to protect their future afterwards. Updating a Will, reviewing ownership arrangements, and ensuring that property matters are dealt with correctly are all part of creating long-term security. These decisions may not carry the same emotional weight as the separation itself, but they are often just as important in helping people move forward with confidence. 

Over the years, what has become increasingly clear is that successful separations are rarely defined by a single document or a single court order. They are defined by whether people feel able to move forward with clarity and certainty about the future. The legal process is important, but it is only one element of a much bigger picture. Financial security, effective communication, practical support, and future planning all play a role in helping families transition from one chapter of life to the next. 

Every person who contacts By Personal Touch has their own story. Their circumstances, concerns, and priorities are unique. However, beneath those individual stories lies a common objective. They want reassurance that they are making the right decisions. They want to understand their options. Most importantly, they want to know that there is a pathway through what can often feel like one of the most challenging periods of their lives. 

Divorce marks the end of a relationship, but it should also provide the opportunity for a new beginning. When the right support is available, people are able to make informed decisions, protect what matters most to them, and build a solid foundation for the future. That is why we believe divorce is never simply about obtaining a divorce. It is about helping people navigate every stage of the journey, from reaching agreement and formalising settlements, through to resolving disputes, planning for the future, and ultimately moving forward with confidence. 

About Anthony Davis

Anthony Davis is the Founder and Director of By Personal Touch, a leading UK-based divorce support service helping separating couples navigate financial settlements, mediation, litigation support, and future planning. With a background in family law and dispute resolution, Anthony has assisted hundreds of individuals through some of life’s most challenging transitions, focusing on practical, affordable, and accessible solutions. He is passionate about helping people understand their options, avoid costly mistakes, and move forward with confidence following separation. 

For more information, visit www.bypersonaltouch.com.

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Divorcing? Reach a Financial Agreement for the Best Outcome

Published on
Zarira Love
Zarira Love
Writer / Researcher
Custody X Change

Agreeing isn’t easy when you’ve split, but it has many advantages.

Financial agreements spare you the slog of a drawn-out divorce process, helping you save money and many headaches.

What is a divorce financial agreement?

A divorce financial agreement covers, in writing, how spouses who are ending their marriage will divide:

  • Property
  • Pensions
  • Savings
  • Investments

Agreements may also address spousal maintenance, stating the amount and how long it is to be paid.

To make an agreement legally binding, you must apply for a consent order.

To make sure your spouse can’t pursue you for more money, you can get a clean break order. This severs all financial ties between you and your spouse, and makes it so neither of you can hassle each other for money later on.

What is a child maintenance agreement?

If you have children, you might also agree on child maintenance.

A child maintenance agreement covers:

  • Who pays maintenance
  • How much they will pay
  • How often it’s paid
  • The payment method

It could be a standalone agreement or part of your agreed parenting plan.

Convincing your spouse to negotiate

If there are hard feelings between you and your spouse, you won’t be too eager to sit down at the negotiating table. Set aside your differences and focus on the positives of agreeing.

Get a faster resolution

If you litigate, the court’s calendar will dictate the pace of your case.

Agreeing means you can resolve things on your own time — and you’ll usually get an order sooner.

Even if you don’t reach a full divorce settlement, your case will still go quicker since you already addressed finances.

Save money

It’s common for spouses to rack up several thousand pounds in solicitor and other fees. Long, drawn out cases can even reach six figures.

Exact costs vary case by case, but alternate methods of dispute resolution are much cheaper than litigation.

  • Direct negotiations: You’ll sit down with your spouse and work out your financial agreements. Essentially, you don’t have to pay anything for the negotiations.
  • Negotiations with a solicitor: A solicitor provides guidance as you work out your agreement. They will also put your agreement in writing. Costs are generally around £3,000.
  • Mediation: A neutral third party will help you and your spouse find common ground so you can agree. On average, mediators charge about £100 to £300 per hour. If your financial situation is simple, the entire process could be less than £1,000.

You’ll save even more by splitting costs with your spouse.

Control the outcome

You and your spouse will have the final say on your financial arrangements. You can customise your agreement to suit your unique needs.

For example, instead of setting a specific amount of child maintenance, you can state the parent will pay for certain expenses, like the child’s schooling.

Preserve decorum

Trials are contentious. If you didn’t already have a fraught relationship, going to court could give you a negative opinion of your spouse.

Negotiating shows grace and a willingness to move on. This is essential if you have children. Agreeing on financials will let you practise compromise which might make it easier to collaborate on decisions related to your child.

Preparing for negotiations

Spouses must disclose all financial assets and liabilities.

You might need to consult an expert to get an accurate portrait of your finances. For example:

  • An estate agent or a chartered surveyor to determine property value
  • A forensic accountant to assess the value of a business
  • An actuary for a report on pension funds

It’s possible to split the costs for these services with your spouse.

Create a written proposal to show your spouse what you believe is fair to help move negotiations along.

Once you’ve agreed, you’ll file your agreement with the court.

Your court-approved agreement goes into effect immediately. You’ll have the peace of mind that the financial parts of your divorce are settled.

Read more articles by Custody X Change.

About Zarira Love

Zarira Love has been researching and writing articles about child custody and parenting for nearly six years. She currently resides in New York City.

Zarira is a Writer / Researcher for Custody X Change.

About Custody X Change: This powerful tool helps divorced and single parents create parenting plans, track their custody schedules, manage expenses and more. Since 2005, we’ve helped over 60,000 parents ensure the best possible future for their children.

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What Family Lawyers Should Know About Business Sales in Divorce Settlements

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Edouard Lyndt
Edouard Lyndt
Founder, M&A Advisor
Sundance Financial

Divorce lawyers routinely handle cases where a privately held business is the largest marital asset, yet the business brokerage engagement process often receives less attention than other aspects of the settlement.

When a business needs to be sold, time pressure from court deadlines, mounting legal fees, and the emotional toll of divorce can make it difficult for clients to carefully evaluate broker engagements. A well-structured brokerage agreement protects both parties and supports a smoother transaction.

This article explains the contract red flags lawyers need to spot and how to protect clients navigating a business sale during divorce.

The Small Business Brokerage Market

33 US states require few formal qualifications to operate a business brokerage. Most other states require only a real estate license. Industry estimates suggest only 3,000-4,000 brokerage firms serve 33 million US businesses. This supply-demand imbalance drives commissions up to 15% on successful sales, far higher than the 5-6% typical in residential real estate (albeit partly due to the higher complexity of business sales).

Deal economics also create interesting market dynamics. A broker working on a $10 million transaction earns significantly more than one handling a $2 million business, which naturally draws experienced professionals toward larger deals. This means business owners in the $500K-$3M range—often the core of divorce-related sales—benefit most from careful broker selection.

For a $2 million business, a 12% commission equals $240,000. Understanding this context helps frame the importance of the engagement terms that follow.

Red Flags in Broker Contracts

When helping your client select a business broker, watch for these engagement terms:

Fees for non-performance

While small retainers are relatively common, standard brokerage agreements charge a success fee only when the business sells. Contracts that require substantial payment even if no transaction closes create severe incentive misalignment.

Red flag: A broker who values a small business at $600,000 and requires a $50,000 “minimum fee” that becomes payable if the seller terminates the engagement or the business fails to sell. That is not a retainer or cost recovery mechanism- it is effectively a guaranteed 8% commission, regardless of outcome.

Automatic renewals without exit rights

Some agreements include long initial terms that automatically renew unless the broker agrees to terminate. A contract with a 12-month initial term that automatically renews for another 12 months creates an effective 24-month exclusive period with no seller exit clause.

Divorce timelines rarely align with business sale timelines. If the divorce settles and circumstances change, your client remains locked in.

Excessive tail periods

Tail provisions protect brokers from circumvention by ensuring they are paid if a buyer they introduced closes after the contract ends. Twelve months is commonly seen in the lower middle market.

Red flag: A contract that combines a 24-month term with a 24-month tail, effectively tying the seller to the broker for four years. If a buyer the broker contacted in month one does not close until year three, the broker still gets paid. This creates long-term financial uncertainty that can complicate settlement negotiations.

What Brokers Actually Deliver

A skilled business broker provides pricing guidance, prepares a Confidential Information Memorandum (CIM), assists in organizing a data room, conducts buyer outreach, and manages the transaction process through closing.

The value differential among brokers typically lies in their ability to negotiate and structure a reasonable transaction, while ensuring that business owners are well informed throughout the process.

How to Protect Your Clients

Lawyers do not need to become M&A specialists to materially improve outcomes for their clients. A few practical steps can reduce risk significantly:

Encourage clients to interview multiple brokers.

Different brokers specialise in different industries and business sizes. In particular, you should distinguish between a broker that specialises in business-sale M&A and one that operates primarily as a real-estate intermediary.

Review engagement terms.

Exclusivity periods, tail lengths, commission rates, and termination rights are negotiable. Having yourself or a trusted person familiar with M&A review the agreement can surface problematic provisions early.

Build relationships with vetted advisors before clients need them.

The worst time to evaluate an M&A advisor is when your client has already decided to sell. Brokers often love engaging with lawyers, so build relationships early.

The Bottom Line

Most business owners spend decades building their business. For many, it represents 70-80% of their net worth. In divorce, that asset often needs to be liquidated under pressure.

As your client’s trusted advisor, your role is not to become an M&A expert. It is to recognise where risks lie, ask the right questions, and spot red flags. A brief review of a broker agreement can protect a meaningful portion of the marital estate.

About Edouard Lyndt

Edouard Lyndt is the founder of Sundance Financial, an M&A advisory firm supporting small business owners through their exit. He has worked with leading investment banks, private equity firms, and consulting companies on deals worth hundreds of millions. Edouard holds an MBA from Harvard Business School, where he graduated as a George F. Baker Scholar.

Connect with Edouard Lyndt on LinkedIn
Follow Sundance Financial on LinkedIn
Visit Sundance Financial

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Budget 2025: What Families Need to Know When Planning Separation or Divorce
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Budget 2025: What Families Need to Know When Planning Separation or Divorce

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Emma Davies
Emma Davies
Partner
Nelsons Law

The 2025 Autumn Budget brings several tax and financial reforms that could significantly affect separating couples, especially those with complex assets.

Emma Davies, partner and family law specialist at Nelsons, highlights that these updates make it even more important for families to plan ahead. Below Emma outlines the key changes and what they mean for those preparing for separation or divorce.

November’s Budget introduced a series of reforms that will shape how families manage their finances going through separation or divorce, some of these changes carry significant strategic implications.

While many headlines focused on support for lower-income families, the Budget also introduced reforms to the taxation of wealth, property income and investments. These shifts mean that separating couples, particularly those with complex assets, should take specialist advice earlier and plan their financial arrangements with even greater precision.

  1. Increased tax focus on wealth and asset income

A central theme of Budget 2025 is increased taxation on income derived from assets, including investment portfolios, rental properties and other passive income streams.

Why this matters during divorce

  • Asset-related tax liabilities can directly influence the value of a settlement.
  • Transfers of investment assets or property between spouses, traditionally tax-neutral, may now carry more considerations around future tax exposure.
  • Individuals with diversified portfolios will need to evaluate the tax efficiency of keeping or trading certain categories of assets, especially where maintenance obligations are involved.

The opportunity

This is the time to revisit tax planning, both before and during a divorce. With specialist advice and careful planning it is possible to preserve value and reduce future tax exposures.

  1. Property and investment portfolios require new strategy

Reforms affecting property income and the broader taxation of asset-derived wealth mean that real estate portfolios, buy-to-let interests and investment properties require closer evaluation during a divorce.

Potential impacts

  • Rental income may attract different tax treatment, affecting affordability of ongoing financial commitments.
  • Timing of asset disposals, particularly high-value properties or shares, becomes more important.
  • Practical takeaway

During negotiations, it’s no longer just about who gets what, but who can most efficiently hold a particular asset class going forward and it will be important to work in tandem with your family lawyer and other professional advisers.

  1. Pension and long-term wealth planning take centre stage

The Budget includes reforms to pensions and savings support including caps on salary sacrifice pension contributions which means these schemes will become less tax advantageous.  In turn, this affects long-term financial planning during divorce as the ability of divorcing couples to rebuild their pensions post-divorce needs to be considered and may affect how settlements are structured.

For individuals with substantial pension wealth, this means:

  • Greater scrutiny on how pensions are shared or offset.
  • Increased importance of actuarial valuation to ensure fair outcomes.
  • More strategic use of pensions as part of overall settlement structuring.

Given the complexity, specialist advice is highly recommended when reviewing pension division and post-divorce retirement planning.

  1. Tax threshold freezes: A slow-burning impact

Personal tax thresholds remain frozen, effectively pulling more individuals into higher tax bands over time (“fiscal drag”).

For some individuals, this means:

  • Increased exposure to higher tax rates on both earned and investment income.
  • Potential increases in effective maintenance obligations.
  • More need for forward-thinking cash-flow planning post-divorce.

This change subtly but meaningfully affects long-term affordability and financial planning for both parties.

  1. Changes to family benefits: Relevance for blended and larger families

Although primarily aimed at lower-income families, the abolition of the two-child limit for Universal Credit and related child benefits has indirect implications for separated parents, blended families and households with childcare responsibilities split between homes.

For clients with more wealth, the relevance is twofold:

  • It may affect negotiations where one parent has significantly lower income or earns irregularly (e.g. entrepreneurs, directors, or individuals with fluctuating asset income).
  • Where school fees, childcare, and lifestyle expectations are high, these changes may form part of broader discussions about child maintenance and living arrangements.

  1. The landscape is more complex – early planning is essential

The Autumn Budget 2025 creates a more complicated financial environment for separating couples, particularly those with:

  • High-value property portfolios
  • Significant investment income
  • Businesses or shareholdings
  • Trust structures
  • International assets
  • Large pension pots

Strategic advice at the earliest stage is crucial. The way assets are valued, shared, or retained now carries different long-term consequences than it did even a year ago.

Emma emphasises that, despite the added complexity, with the right advice families can still make informed and confident decisions about their future. If you’re considering separation or are in the early stages of divorce, Nelsons’ family law team can help you navigate the Budget’s implications and protect your long-term financial position.

To find out more about Nelsons’ family team, please visit: https://www.nelsonslaw.co.uk/personal-legal-services/family-law-solicitors/

For more information, please contact Huma Mian or Niamh Tracey at Cartwright on 0115 853 2110.

About Emma Davies

Emma is a partner and head the family law team at Nelsons. She qualified as a Solicitor in 2008 and has been at Nelsons since 2009.
Emma advises on divorce and financial settlements which involve complex issues and substantial assets. She also advises on pre and post nuptial agreements and separation agreements along with private law Children Act disputes. Emma is a qualified collaborative practitioner.
Emma’s areas of expertise include divorce, civil partnership dissolution, financial provision, collaborative law, pre-nuptial agreements, post-nuptial agreements, separation agreements, parental responsibility, child arrangements, and prohibited steps orders and specific issue orders.

About Nelsons: 

Nelsons was established in 1983 and provides support to businesses, individuals and families with their legal and investment needs. Nelsons’ experience and depth of resource has also enabled them to offer services to other solicitors through Fusion Legal – a mutually-beneficial referrals and support network for law firms. The firm is recognised by the leading, independently researched Legal 500 and is recommended by them in more than 20 practice areas. The firm is recommended by Chambers and Partners and also features in The Lawyer’s UK 200 Annual Report of the UK’s largest 200 law firms. Nelsons has offices throughout the East Midlands in Nottingham, Leicester & Derby

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How Hidden Assets Deny Fair Divorce Settlements, and What You Can Do
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How Hidden Assets Deny Fair Divorce Settlements, and What You Can Do

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George Simpson
George Simpson Director of Operations, Investigations and Regulation Services iSanctuary

Every year, thousands of people face unfair divorce settlements because their former partners hide or disguise their true wealth.  In this article, iSanctuary’s Director of Investigations, George Simpson, talks about how hidden assets can be uncovered, and what you can do to protect your financial future.

When the truth about money and assets are concealed

Divorce is often a hugely emotive and stressful event, where even seemingly amicable and open arrangements are later found to have been made in bad faith.  Too often, one party (more often, though not exclusively, women) faces the devastating reality of a partner concealing or obfuscating their wealth to the detriment of the other.

“We see time and again that hidden wealth isn’t always about vast fortunes, sometimes it’s the house that was unknowingly transferred, or the company shares ‘sold’ to a friend,” says George Simpson, an experienced financial crime investigator and Director of Operations at iSanctuary.  “What makes the difference is early identification of the issue, before the trail goes cold.”

Whether through offshore holdings, crypto assets, or conveniently “forgotten” investments, hidden assets can dramatically distort the outcome of a divorce.

The Growing Challenge of Hidden Assets

For those in the UK, the disclosure process is designed to ensure both parties reveal their full financial position.  Unfortunately, some individuals choose to conceal or misrepresent information during this stage, and without expert help, it can often go unnoticed.  Such actions can result in a drastically reduced settlement with potentially life changing consequences in terms of a spouses’ long-term financial stability.

In today’s globalised financial world, funds can be moved across borders instantly.  Crypto assets, offshore structures in opaque jurisdictions make tracing assets increasingly complex.

Women that paused their careers to raise families are disproportionately affected, often simply because they lack access to the full financial picture.

Red flags to watch for include:

  • Unexplained changes in business ownership or spending
  • Delays or evasions during Form E disclosure
  • Transfers to family members or new entities
  • A sudden interest in cryptocurrency or “foreign investments”.

“Every asset leaves a footprint, the challenge is following that footprint through layers of misdirection, and that’s where professional asset tracing becomes an indispensable.”

Practical Steps: Protecting What’s Rightfully Yours

If you suspect your spouse may be hiding wealth, here are five practical steps to safeguard your position:

  1. Act early: Raise your concerns as soon as possible; time is critical in preventing asset dissipation.
  2. Keep everything: Store copies of statements, tax returns, and even old emails, they may reveal inconsistencies.
  3. Engage professionals: Solicitors, forensic accountants, and investigators can collaborate effectively to expose concealed assets.
  4. Know your rights: Under UK family law, both parties are legally required to give full and frank disclosure.
  5. Ask about funding: If you’re financially restricted, specialist funding can help cover investigation and legal fees until your settlement is finalised.

How iSanctuary Can Help

At iSanctuary, our Divorce Asset Tracer service is designed to give clients clarity and control.

This fixed-price investigative service offers an initial assessment of a person’s global asset profile, helping uncover what’s missing from disclosure documents and providing the client with sufficient information to inform their decision making and develop a negotiation strategy.

For more complex cases, iSanctuary’s full-suite of investigative services combine traditional field expertise with advanced technology to trace crypto assets, reveal offshore holdings, and build robust evidence for court if required.

Our reports are legally defensible in UK proceedings, and our investigators, including George Simpson, are available to provide expert witness testimony.

“Our work isn’t about confrontation, it’s about restoring fairness and creating a level playing field.  We help clients see what’s really theirs and ensure settlements reflect reality, not manipulation.”

The Human Impact, and the Hope

Hidden assets don’t just skew numbers on a spreadsheet.  They determine whether someone can afford a safe home for their children, continue schooling without disruption, or simply move forward without financial anxiety.

“It’s powerful when we can give someone the evidence to walk into court with confidence, knowing they have the truth on their side.”

Take the First Step

If you believe your spouse or partner may be hiding assets, don’t delay.  Hidden wealth can be traced, but timing and expertise matter.

You can contact iSanctuary for a free, confidential consultation and learn how our Divorce Asset Tracer service can help you protect what’s rightfully yours.

Email Tim Gilkison in confidence at: tg@isanctuary.io

https://isanctuary.io/asset-tracer-divorce/

 

About George Simpson and iSanctuary

George Simpson is Director of Operations, Investigations and Regulation Services at iSanctuary.  He is a highly experienced professional with specialist knowledge and proven experience in law enforcement and financial services regulation in the context of a broad range of financial crime settings. George has worked in specialist departments within New Scotland Yard, precursor agencies of the National Crime Agency, and latterly the Financial Conduct Authority.  His expertise includes the investigation and successful prosecution of ground-breaking serious and complex fraud and money laundering cases.  George has extensive knowledge of the UK’s regulatory anti-money laundering and counter terrorist financing regime.

iSanctuary is a specialist intelligence and investigations firm uncovering hidden wealth and undisclosed assets worldwide.  With over $1 billion in assets identified, the company provides legally defensible investigations that help clients achieve fair and transparent financial outcomes in divorce and litigation.

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Our Relationship is Over: What Do I Do Now?
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Our Relationship is Over: What Do I Do Now?

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James Pirrie
James Pirrie
Director at
Family Law in Partnership

Let’s not sugar coat it, this question “what do I do now?” (at the moment you know you will separate) is the single most important question you will answer in this whole chapter of your life. There will be a lot of other questions that you will be coming to, but get this one right and you should be able to avoid the unreasonable positioning and exhausting demands of a slow process that will cost eye-watering amounts, to achieve to your best possible outcome.  

Here are my ten top tips from helping clients through this part of their lives for the past forty-something years.

1. Ensure you are safe 

Ensure your safety and the safety of your children.  If there is a risk to this then it will dictate how you address the rest of these tips.

Safety at the end of a relationship is a whole topic on its own and planning for it will depend on your situation.  In controlling relationships, it is likely that a whole range of strategies will have been put in place around you by your prospective ex, with the intention of making it impossible for you to go.  The single most important thing is to reach the realisation that yes you are going to leave – it is then about getting the support to manage your way out of the maze. If you need help to leave safely, there are amazing organisations that can help you manage a safe exit.  Everything follows from this.

2. Manage your emergencies

In the same way, some separations have emergencies – personal safety is the most important.  Others can include:

  • jurisdictional races (where one of you could start proceedings in a different country, you may need to act quickly to ensure your divorce takes place where your needs and those of the children will be met favourably)
  • a child being taken abroad to separate them from you (child abduction)
  • information or assets being hidden or disposed of 
  • your being isolated from funds.

Some of these you can address in part – or at least make easier – but many of them are going to require immediate professional help, probably from a solicitor.

The rest of the “to-dos” are subject to emergencies – sometimes you won’t have time to plan your best path, you will feel bounced around by circumstance. Just carry on trying your best, accepting where you are and planning from there. 

3. Consider couple counselling

If there are no safety concerns, this is a consideration that you should not skate past. I have worked for too many people who have said their ex has come back to them some years down the road saying “I got it wrong – I don’t know what I was thinking- is there a way back for us?”. For me that points to a missed opportunity for some serious conversation around what was not working in the relationship and each person’s capacity for change. Of course, the result may still be that you decide to separate, but talking things through a counsellor is also likely to reassure and make for better progress if you do decide to part. 

4. Be kind if you can

So often, perhaps when people come to me midway through, they seem to be in a terrible situation, which they are finding hard to understand. There might be brutality around disclosure or how the finances are being managed for the interim or how arrangements are being set around the children. It is all a bit destructive and aimless, which is a surprise as they’re decent people. So, what went wrong?  Well usually it is about how things started.  

Actions like deception and adultery matter (see my blog here on this very point) – perhaps not to the professionals who know the courts don’t care, but they really matter to the person being deceived and to their kids when they find out.  Brutal and sharp separations are like throwing a huge slab of concrete into a small pond – the splash and ripples are going to play havoc for a while and in unexpected ways.  Stepping out slowly and gently with empathy respect and understanding, can help everyone get through to the smart choices more quickly.

5. Start early

It follows that planning and starting early is usually a positive too, you can pace things more calmly. You don’t find yourself suddenly desperate that it all has to be sorted by the weekend. (That “I have just had it up to here” moment). It also means that you are less likely to be bounced into the “well I am leaving you” discussion at the worst of times in the heat of an argument.  These things are going to be tough and thinking about how to do it in the best way, in the calm, will pay dividends.

6. Get support

All of that is going to point towards you getting individual support.  So many  people say “I don’t need that fluffy stuff …” or “we are not getting back together”. But that is not what this is about. It is about understanding where your ex is and what they are going through. It is about helping you to think of this from their side to be able to move things on in the best way possible. It is tough.  It is practical. It is also short term and goal-oriented.

Find the right support and you will be challenged to do this well, but also supported to do so.  That’s why I recommend that you get professional support – not just support from your mates or family:

This is the other response to my recommendation of professional expertise is “well I am talking to my friends.” The problem with relying solely on friends and family is that:

  • They care too much and as such, are likely to operate like an echo chamber for you: they want to be supportive and are likely to tell you what they think you want to hear – which is not always what you need to hear
  • They may bring their own unresolved personal issues to the conversation and that is not helpful 
  • They don’t have the training to help you process everything in a constructive way 
  • Their advice is likely to be on the hoof, quick answers without the depth of consideration that is really needed
  • You may find yourself managing your choices to keep them satisfied.

Without meaning to cast aspersions on your inner circle, you are also sharing confidences with them which may well be shared with others. 

I could go on but in essence, therapists are likely to be the most valuable in monetary terms. Find the right one and use them.

7. Think and write

So you know you are going to need to get some advice and guidance (how else are you going to have the anchor of knowing your rights and obligations – how else would you recognise a good deal?). Lawyers charge by time and will read a well-organised briefing way quicker than they can ask questions and you answer them. Many firms will have an information gatherer on their website. If you want to get the most from your time with a lawyer and keep costs time, you would prepare:

  • A balance sheet of where you are now:
    •  who is in the family and who are the relatives and important other people in your lives
    • all the dates and details that are going to be needed such as when the relationship started, was formalised and ended
    • and yes those financial numbers all pinned down so far as known. 
    • In addition there will be descriptions of what is going on – what everyone is like; how are your children doing, pictures etc.  
  • An account of how you got here this is likely to take in your families of origin, education, careers, first homes, challenges and so on
  • And then the quick fire document for a first call: The super brief summary and a clear vision of what you want and what you think are the hurdles to getting there.

Indeed sometimes I think that this last piece of knowing what you are needing is the single most important piece of work that will be in your briefing for the next step.

8. Find the right professional

This can feel like a minefield. There are directories ranking legal professionals, but they may not be your best starting point.  What you are likely to want is that skilled professional whom you trust because they get you and their values resonate with yours, simple as that.  

When you are researching there will be lots of focus on who does what process and your head can spin with the terms likely to be coming at you:  negotiation/ collaborative/ co-operative/ one lawyer/ together/ amicable/ litigation/ mediation/ child inclusion/ hybrid/ integrative, but that shouldn’t be your worry: Your job is to be clear about your needs (those hurdles you identified at stage 7), not the process (which is what the professional brings to accommodate them). It is the professional’s job to show that they have heard you and to explain their recommendation.  If you are convinced, you have the start of your plan. If you are not then say so – if you are not heard, you may not be in the right room so think about moving on now.  

It is why you might do well to choose a professional who is serious about all the different ways of doing things – it will ensure you are presented with all the options. Many lawyers will only have one qualification, permitting them to negotiate your case  with the court as a fall back and the court is the last place most people want to end up.  If your lawyer doesn’t know, isn’t familiar with and doesn’t use collaborative, mediation or arbitration  then just have in mind that these ways that might suit you better will probably not be on the menu for discussion.

9. Be brave …ish

Sitting down to talk with your ex may be absolutely the last thing you want to do, and of course you shouldn’t compromise safety, but for most people, a professionally assisted conversation with a neutral person (likely to be in mediation – but potentially “one lawyer”) is likely to be the fast route to finding the best solution. Your ex is likely to have a view of what they think the outcome should be and they are going to hang onto it until you can show that you have heard them. It is much harder to do this if your discussion is via letters and emails being fired between lawyers from their respective trenches a seeming “safe” distance away from each other.

The right mediator will help you both to manage a safe and productive conversation even in difficult situations. There would be an assessment and  intake process (called “a MIAM”, standing for Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting) when you can gather an understanding of what mediation would be like and talk through whether it is for you. In fact, you are required in most situations to have this meeting even if you wanted ultimately to go to court and I would encourage you to enter this meeting with an open mind as there is a lot of flexibility in mediation and other processes which may mean they are better for you.

10. Think kids

So obvious you may say it didn’t need saying. Where you have children, they are likely to be the lens through which all of this is viewed, you will consider your children:

  • when you take steps to start
  • in how you manage the relationship with your ex (because you are usually going to be co-parenting long term so you will not want to lay waste to how you talk to each other)
  • in the choices you make (for example the geography of your homes and family-friendly career-choices)
  • in the timing of any new relationship
  • in how you work out care and decision making: your children are part of each of you, they need safe arrangements to have a relationship with each of you if possible – and ideally each of you supporting the other to be the best parent you can be.

There is a lot to consider and it is all too easy to delay. But whether this relationship is your future or not is for you to decide and in your heart you will know the answer to that (especially if you have been through tip 3).  

If this relationship is not working and can’t be made to work, it is unlikely to be the best example of “adult relationships” for your kids, but beyond this, please don’t become that person I see so regularly who says “now I know about it all, I should have done this a decade ago, it would have been better for everyone.”

Read more articles by James Pirrie.

Read more articles by Family Law in Partnership.

About James Pirrie

James Pirrie is a Director of Family Law in Partnership, a highly regarded law firm based in London, which specialises in de-escalating conflict in family law.  He is an Arbitrator, Family Solicitor and Mediator accredited in child-inclusive mediation.

James is driven to improve long term outcomes for families who are experiencing separation or divorce.  He is credited with introducing collaborative law to the UK and with changing how children’s needs are addressed during family breakdown through the Parenting after Parting initiative.

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Money Grief After Divorce - The Loss No One Talks About
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Money Grief After Divorce – The Loss No One Talks About

Published on
Karen Omand BASoc BAThan CT
Karen Omand BASoc BAThan CT
Co-Founder
Divorceworkshop

When we think about grief after divorce, most people imagine the loss of love, trust, or family structure. But there’s another kind of grief that runs deep—and is rarely named: money grief.

One of my clients once said,

“I’m not grieving the loss of my ex, my identity, or our failed dreams. I’m grieving not seeing my children every day—and losing my beautiful house.”

In the divorce world, we often talk about grieving relationships, family routines, or personal identity. But there’s a quieter grief many people carry: I miss my house. I miss the lifestyle I once had.

Divorce often means a dramatic financial shift. Economically, things get harder, income is typically cut in half. But beyond the numbers lies a deeper emotional reckoning: the loss of financial stability, the unraveling of future plans, and the vanishing of a lifestyle that once defined you.

This grief doesn’t always cry out. It doesn’t get lasagne or sympathy cards. It happens quietly,in private moments, in budget spreadsheets, in smaller food shops, or in walking past a house you used to call home. And yet, few people talk about it.

The Hidden Financial Costs of Divorce

When people think about the financial side of divorce, they often focus on child maintenance, spousal support, or dividing assets. But there’s a deeper financial cost that often goes unmentioned: the actual price of the divorce process itself.

From the legal fees to mediation costs, divorce can quickly become expensive. Many people don’t realise just how costly it can be to separate a shared life,with solicitors, mediators, court fees, and the emotional toll all taking a significant chunk of resources.

The financial strain can feel overwhelming, especially when people are trying to rebuild their lives on a smaller budget. Yet these hidden costs are rarely addressed during the divorce process, leaving many feeling financially depleted long after the legal proceedings have ended.

This often leads to more hidden grief, as people mourn not just the life they built with their spouse, but the financial security that’s now out of reach.

Money Grief Is Real – But Disenfranchised

I talk about disenfranchised grief a lot in the divorce world. The term, coined by thanatologist Dr Kenneth Doka, describes grief that isn’t acknowledged by society, grief that isn’t openly validated or supported. He defines it as:

“Grief that persons experience when they incur a loss that is not or cannot be openly acknowledged, socially sanctioned, or publicly mourned.”

No one throws a “sorry you lost your pension” support circle. Like I stated above, you don’t get shepherd’s pie when you have to sell your home or move into a smaller flat. And if you do talk about money grief, you might be met with raised eyebrows or comments like, “Well you wanted out” or “Why didn’t you fight harder to keep it?”

But money grief after divorce is real, and painful. You may lose your financial stability, your dream home, the future you planned for, or the lifestyle that once shaped your identity. These are profound losses. But because they don’t fit the traditional mould of grief, they’re often minimised or dismissed.

That’s what makes this kind of grief disenfranchised: it’s invisible to others, even though it weighs heavily on you.

The Shame and Stigma of Financial Loss

This kind of grief is often hidden beneath a layer of shame.

I remember my aunt once warning someone whose marriage was on the rocks, “Well, look at Karen’s life, you don’t want that.” The implication was clear: losing financial status after divorce isn’t just painful, it’s something to be feared, even judged.

There’s a deep embarrassment many people feel when going through divorce, especially when it comes to money. In our culture, success is often measured by financial stability. Wealth is equated with worth. So when divorce disrupts that, the grief of financial loss can be wrapped in layers of shame.

You’re not just grieving the money, you’re questioning your identity, your value, and your place in the world.

Divorce already comes with financial hardship. Layer on shame and stigma, and many begin to feel like they’ve failed. That fear of judgement keeps people silent. Some don’t even recognise what they’re feeling as grief—they just know they feel hollow, anxious, and unsure of who they are now that the money picture has changed.

We Underestimate the Emotional Cost of Divorce

Yes, many people going through divorce expect lifestyle changes. But few understand just how emotionally destabilising those changes can be.

It’s not just about moving, it’s mourning the neighbourhood where your kids grew up, the memories held in the walls of your home, the dream of retiring early, or putting your child through university.

It’s realising that your identity may have been tied to being the provider, the planner, or the one who held it all together, and now you’re starting over. You may no longer be able to afford the things you once took for granted or pursue the future you had carefully built toward.

That kind of loss isn’t just about pounds and pence, it cuts deep into your sense of self, your stability, and your hopes.

The Invisible Cost of Gender Roles and Dependency

For many women, especially those who stepped out of the workforce to raise children or support a partner’s career, divorce can feel like falling into financial uncertainty.

Even if they receive spousal or child maintenance, the loss of long-term career potential and professional identity can bring intense feelings of grief, regret, and a sense of wasted time.

Studies show that women often face bigger financial setbacks after divorce compared to men. For example, one study found that women’s household incomes drop by 41% in the first year after a divorce, almost double the 21% drop men experience.

This difference is partly due to traditional gender roles, where women are often the primary caregivers. This can mean interruptions in their careers, leading to a wider pay gap. Plus, women are more likely to give up a portion of their partner’s pension in a divorce settlement, which only adds to their financial challenges.

Even with support, the emotional cost of financial insecurity is huge. Many women not only grieve the loss of their partner but also the loss of their financial independence and identity.

Comparison Silences the Grief

Divorce grief is deeply personal and can be incredibly complex. The support people receive during divorce can be just as subjective. You might hear well-meaning comments from friends, family, or even other divorced peers like:

  • “At least you got the house.”
  • “At least your ex pays child maintenance.”
  • “You seem to be doing okay.”

When faced with remarks like these, what are you supposed to say?

While these comments may come from a place of kindness, they can unintentionally make someone feel like they don’t have the space to grieve what they’ve truly lost. But here’s the truth: You can be grateful for what you have—and still grieve what you’ve lost.

If you were the one who left, you can acknowledge that the divorce was the right decision—and still mourn the cost it took on your life.

Naming the Loss Is the First Step to Healing

Money grief isn’t about greed, it’s about mourning the loss of stability, identity, and the future you once imagined. Recognising that truth is powerful.

Grief can show up in bank statements, in cancelled holidays, in the quiet ache of walking past your old home. But just because it’s invisible doesn’t mean it’s not real.

You deserve to name this loss. You deserve space to grieve it.

And most importantly, you deserve support, compassion, and the chance to rebuild a life that honours what you’ve been through and where you want to go next.

References

  • Doka, K. J. (2002). Disenfranchised Grief: New Directions, Challenges, and Strategies for Practice. Research Press.
  • Legal & General – The Divorce Gap: Women’s Household Income Drops Twice as Much as Men’s After Divorce

Read more articles by Karen Omand BASoc BAThan CT.

About Karen Omand BASoc BAThan CT

Karen Omand holds a rare university degree in Thanatology and a B.A. in Sociology. She is the co-author of the “Just Separated Divorce Workbook,” coming out this October, and co-founder of The Divorce Workshop. As a private counsellor and coach, Karen specialises in high-conflict cases, post-divorce abuse, grief, and divorce. Having navigated her own high-conflict divorce, she is also the mother of two lovely daughters.

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Pension Sharing Orders: What You Need to Know
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Pension Sharing Orders: What You Need to Know

Published on
Peter Marples
Peter Marples
Editor at The Divorce Magazine
Director at Fair Result

Sponsored post by Fair Result.

Why a Pension Matters in Divorce

Only 13% of divorcees consider pensions when dividing assets. Pensions are often the second biggest asset after the home – but often ignored at your peril to protect you in later life.

Pensions represent a critical part of financial security, particularly in later life. Yet, during the tumultuous process of divorce, they are frequently overlooked. This can lead to significant financial disadvantages for one or both parties. Understanding the importance of pensions and the mechanisms available for sharing them is essential for anyone going through a divorce or dissolution of a civil partnership.

What is a Pension Sharing Order?

A Pension Sharing Order (PSO) is a legal order that allows for the division of pension assets between divorcing spouses or civil partners. This order ensures a fair distribution of pension benefits, providing financial security to both parties. It is often described as equalisation of income in retirement, and this is what the courts try to achieve when looking at pension distribution even when only one party has a significant pension. A report is often required from a pension expert to forecast how dividing a pension between parties will result in the equalisation of income for the later years.

When a PSO is granted, a specified percentage of one party’s pension is transferred to the other party. This division is legally binding and can be enforced by the court, ensuring that the agreed-upon split is executed. The transferred pension benefits can either be directed into a new pension scheme for the receiving party or remain within the original scheme with the benefits reallocated.

Pension Sharing vs. Other Options

While a Pension Sharing Order is a common and often preferred method for dividing pension assets, there are other alternatives, such as offsetting and pension attachment orders.

Offsetting: This involves balancing the value of the pension against other assets. For example, one party may keep the pension while the other party receives a larger share of the property or other financial assets. This is effectively simply dividing the overall assets at the time of divorce to achieve equalisation at that point – with the courts often accepting house values and pension values rise at roughly the same rate.

Pension Attachment Orders: This method, also known as earmarking, directs a portion of the pension benefits to the ex-spouse when they are paid out. However, this does not transfer ownership and can be less flexible and reliable than a PSO. Often not a common approach taken by the courts.

PSOs are often favoured because they provide a clean break and clear division of pension assets, ensuring that both parties have financial independence post-divorce.

Who Can Apply & When

PSOs are available to individuals undergoing divorce or dissolution of a civil partnership. It is important to note that these orders are not automatic and must either be agreed upon by both parties or ordered by the court. The division of the pension will clearly be set out in the financial consent order and a pension sharing annex attached to the consent order will also be approved by the court. This must be sent to the pension company dealing with the distribution within 4 months of the consent order being approved by the court.

Eligibility conditions include:

  • The parties must be legally divorcing or dissolving a civil partnership.
  • Both parties must agree to the order, or it must be mandated by the court.

How the Process Works

The process of obtaining a PSO involves several steps and can be complex. Here is a simplified timeline:

Step 1: Obtain a pension valuation. This requires contacting the pension provider to evaluate the current worth of the pension. This is commonly referred to as obtaining the CETV value of the pension (Cash Equivalent Transfer Value)

Step 2: Legal paperwork and court involvement. Solicitors and sometimes actuaries and pension experts will be involved in drafting and submitting the necessary documents to the court.

Step 3: The court grants the Pension Sharing Order. Once the court approves the order, the pension provider is instructed to execute the division of assets.

What Happens After the Order is Made?

Once a PSO is granted, its implementation begins:

  • Percentage-based transfer: The agreed-upon percentage of the pension is either transferred to the receiving party’s new pension scheme or reallocated within the current scheme.
  • Internal transfer: In some cases, the benefits remain within the original scheme but are adjusted to reflect the new ownership division.

Common Pitfalls to Avoid in Pension Sharing Orders

Navigating the division of pensions can be fraught with challenges. Here are some common pitfalls to avoid:

  • Not valuing the pension correctly: Obtaining an accurate valuation is crucial for a fair division.
  • Agreeing to a split without legal or financial advice: Professional guidance ensures that your interests are protected.
  • Failing to account for future needs: Consider long-term financial security when dividing assets.
  • Also consider the scheme rules for each pension and find out what happens if you die before you receive the pension – can it be distributed as part of your estate or do the scheme rules not allow for this. Very common in some public sector pensions.

Fair Result’s Approach

At Fair Result, we support our clients through the process of obtaining a Pension Sharing Order with expert financial advice and clear communication.

  • Access to financial experts who can provide accurate pension valuations and strategic advice.
  • WhatsApp contact for convenient and timely communications.
  • Fixed-fee model ensuring financial clarity from day one.

Conclusion

In conclusion, pensions should be a part of every divorce conversation. Their importance to financial security in later life cannot be overstated. Ensuring a fair division through a Pension Sharing Order can provide peace of mind and stability for both parties involved.

Download our Divorce Guide or get in touch for a free consultation to explore how we can assist you in protecting your financial future.

Read more articles by Peter Marples.

About Peter Marples

Peter Marples – Director of Fair Result and qualified accountant, with the determination to change the way divorce is transacted. For further advice on financial settlements and navigating divorce, use the contact details below:

  • Email
  • Give the team a call – 07500933818 or 0333 577 7009
  • Complete an enquiry form

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5 Tips for Managing Your Child's Expenses Post Divorce
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5 Tips for Managing Your Child’s Expenses Post Divorce

Published on
Zarira Love
Zarira Love
Writer / Researcher
Custody X Change

Divorce leads to major changes in your finances. You might pay thousands for solicitor and court fees. With one income leaving your home, you’ll likely incur new expenses like child care if a parent will no longer be at home to care for the children.

While your ex should shoulder some of the burden for the cost of raising your child, it might fall mostly on you if you provide the child’s primary residence.

It’s a lot to take on, but if you’re proactive, you can manage.

Tip #1: Create a monthly budget

A budget can help you stay within your means and figure out where you need to cut corners.

As you prepare for divorce, make a categorised list of all your bills (e.g., housing, electricity) and expected expenses (e.g., food, petrol), along with how much you expect to spend in each category.

While bills are straightforward, it can be a bit tricky to estimate expenses. Look at receipts, bank statements and other proofs of payment to help you figure out your average expenses. Keep in mind, this amount might vary month to month. The goal is to figure out how much you spend on average so you don’t spend more than you make.

You could do separate accounting for your child’s expenses (a sound idea if the other parent is expected to pay a portion) or keep it all together. Example expenses you might incur because of your child include:

  • Schooling (e.g., uniforms, tutoring, supplies)
  • Transport
  • Communications (e.g., TV, internet, mobile phone)
  • Clothing and footwear
  • Extra-curriculars
  • Recreation (e.g., eating out, going to concerts)
  • Child care
  • Medicine
  • Personal care

Add up your bills and expenses to get your total monthly spending.

Next, add up your earnings from work and other sources, like spousal or child maintenance if you’re receiving payments.

Subtract total bills and expenses from your earnings. You could allocate a portion of your residuals to savings. Include this in your budget as well.

If you’re left with zero or less, find ways to adjust your budget to suit your income. Your child might have a piano lesson once a week rather than twice. You might unsubscribe from a streaming service.

Keep track of your monthly spending to make sure you’re sticking to your budget. If you’re looking for a template for your budget, there are budget worksheets available online or you can create a spreadsheet. There are also finance apps that help you stay on top of spending.

Tip #2: Make a plan for shared co-parenting expenses

Co-parents often argue about how to sort out costs related to the children.

A good way to lessen headaches is to make a list of co-parenting shared expenses. Discuss with your co-parent how you’ll split each expense or whether one parent will cover the full cost.

You might split everything equally or split in relation to each parent’s income. You could keep track of these expenses and invoice one another for reimbursement at the end of the month.

Tip #3: Prioritise needs over wants

In the aftermath of divorce, you’ll feel some guilt that makes you want to spoil your kids.

It’s tough not being able to get your child everything they want. However, if you spoil them, they’ll expect that treatment all the time, which may not be possible with your budget.

Budget for gifts, entertainment and recreation last so they don’t get in the way of paying bills and buying necessities.

Tip #4: Teach your children financial responsibility

Help your children learn the value of money so their expectations become a bit more realistic.

One way to teach your children financial literacy is to give them pocket money. Assign chores for them to do to earn their money so they gain understanding of the work you put in to provide for them.

When your child asks for something pricey, encourage them to save up a portion of their pocket money until they can afford it so they learn the importance and benefits of saving.

If your child is mature enough, you could allow them to have their own bank account and debit card.

Tip #5: Seek help when needed

Newly divorced parents often feel the need to prove they can go it alone. While learning self-reliance is essential to moving on, there’s nothing wrong with getting help to benefit your child.

Professionals like financial advisers assist your transition to post-divorce life by advising you on your spending and how to save more. Plus, government resources are available. Reach out to family and friends for support as well. They can be especially important when it comes to saving on child care costs.

Read more articles by Zarira Love.

Read more articles by Custody X Change.

About Zarira Love

Zarira Love has been researching and writing articles about child custody and parenting for nearly six years. She currently resides in New York City.

Zarira is a Writer / Researcher for Custody X Change.

About Custody X Change: This powerful tool helps divorced and single parents create parenting plans, track their custody schedules, manage expenses and more. Since 2005, we’ve helped over 60,000 parents ensure the best possible future for their children.

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How to Prepare for Financial Discussions During Divorce

Published on
Peter Marples
Peter Marples
Editor at The Divorce Magazine
Director at Fair Result

(Sponsored post by Fair Result.) Many people focus on the divorce process itself, but in reality, the financial settlement is often the most complex and costly part. It’s important to remember that financial discussions are separate from the divorce application, and many lawyers don’t include these costs in their initial quotes.

In an ideal world, couples should agree on finances before filing for divorce. Unfortunately, that’s not the reality. Instead, financial negotiations are the stage that:

  • Takes the most time
  • Causes the most disputes
  • Can become extremely expensive

Some lawyers justify high fees by claiming they can secure a better settlement. But is a marginally better deal worth years of delays, stress, and family tension? In my personal experience, the financial battle took over a decade to repair relationships within the family.

Common Mistakes in Financial Settlements

Divorcees understandably worry about their financial security and getting their fair share, but common mistakes often make the process harder:

  • Delaying financial negotiations until the final divorce order is in place
  • Unrealistic expectations of what they are entitled to
  • Focussing on minor assets instead of the bigger picture (e.g., arguing over furniture instead of pensions)
  • Assuming their lifestyle will remain the same post-divorce
  • Forgetting that one marital home must now fund two separate households

Understanding these issues early can minimise costs and help you move forward smoothly.

Take a Strategic Approach

The best way to approach financial discussions is strategically. The first question you should ask yourself is: What do I actually want?

Being clear and realistic from the start can prevent unnecessary delays. For example, many clients insist they want to keep the family home, only to realise months later that it carries too many memories, leading to wasted time and weakened negotiation power.

Additionally, be mindful of asset values—a dining table purchased for £10,000 five years ago may only be worth £500 today. A spouse may counter by offering to let you keep it in exchange for £5,000, which is an unfavourable deal.

Understand the Marital Pot

Before formally starting divorce proceedings, take stock of all assets and debts, including:

  • House(s) and property ownership details
  • Pensions and savings
  • Employment income
  • Bank accounts and investments
  • Loans, credit cards, and other debts

This doesn’t take long, but failing to do so can lead to confusion and unfair settlements. Surprisingly, many individuals don’t even know their spouse’s income or pension provisions.

Also, check property ownership—if you’re not on the mortgage, you may not be a legal owner. Consider placing a home rights order to protect yourself.

Ignore ‘Advice’ from Friends & the Internet

Friends and online sources may tell you what you want to hear—“You’ll get 80% of everything”—but that’s rarely the case. In most UK divorces, courts aim for a 50/50 split, regardless of who earned the money.

What matters is realism, not wishful thinking.

Don’t Let the Process Control the Outcome

Many assume that completing a Form E (a financial disclosure document) is the key to unlocking hidden assets. While it provides a snapshot of finances, it rarely reveals surprises that dramatically change settlements. Lawyers may encourage it to justify fees, but if you already know your finances, this step may add little value.

Focus on substance over form—you know better than anyone what matters in your settlement.

Be Realistic & Plan for the Future

Divorce almost always results in both parties being financially worse off—at least initially. Two separate households are more expensive than one. However, this is often temporary.

Most individuals find a new relationship shortly after divorce, either during or within a few years post-settlement. This may mean cohabiting again, reducing financial strain. Understanding that financial hardship is often short-term can help in making practical decisions.

Do You Need Professional Advice?

Yes—but choose wisely. Many cases drag on for years simply because no settlement offers have been exchanged. Others suffer from unrealistic expectations that lawyers fail to challenge.

Look for a professional who:

  • Offers fixed-fee services (not just an hourly rate)
  • Provides clear, pragmatic advice
  • Challenges unrealistic expectations
  • Helps you focus on the bigger picture, not minor disputes

If your lawyer isn’t giving you clarity, you might be paying for unnecessary delays.

Key Takeaways

  1. Start early—understand your finances before filing for divorce
  2. Think big—avoid costly fights over small assets
  3. Be realistic—divorce means financial adjustments for both sides
  4. Know what you want—and be prepared to adapt
  5. Get solid legal advice—but ensure it’s strategic, not drawn-out
  6. Plan for the future—life continues, and financial struggles won’t last forever

Finally, protect yourself for the future. Divorce is becoming more common, and many people go through it more than once.

Need expert, fixed-fee family law advice?

Contact www.fair-result.co.uk today for pragmatic, award-winning guidance.

Call: 07 500 933 818 or 0333 577 7009

Email: peter@fair-result.co.uk or chris@fair-result.co.uk

Read more articles by Peter Marples.

About Peter Marples

Peter Marples – Director of Fair Result and qualified accountant, with the determination to change the way divorce is transacted. For further advice on financial settlements and navigating divorce, use the contact details below:

  • Email
  • Give the team a call – 07500933818 or 0333 577 7009
  • Complete an enquiry form

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How to Get Through Divorce in 2025: Proven Step-by-Step Process
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How to Get Through Divorce in 2025: Proven Step-by-Step Process

Published on
Chris Sweetman
Chris Sweetman
Editor at The Divorce Magazine
Director at Fair Result

Sponsored post by Fair Result.

Divorce can feel overwhelming, but at Fair Result, we’ve created a proven, step-by-step process to help you navigate it with clarity and confidence. In 2025, with shifting legal landscapes and evolving financial complexities, our transparent, fixed-fee approach ensures that you can focus on your future without worrying about spiralling costs or hidden surprises.

1. Acknowledging the Emotional Impact

Divorce is one of life’s most emotional and challenging experiences. It’s essential to recognise and process these feelings, rather than suppress them. Many people find that seeking emotional support can make a world of difference during this time.

Tips for self-care during divorce:

  • Consider joining a support group to connect with others who understand your situation.
  • Seek counselling or therapy to work through your emotions in a healthy way.
  • Prioritise self-care through activities like exercise, mindfulness, or spending time with loved ones.

At Fair Result, we not only focus on the legal and financial aspects of your divorce but also recognise the importance of addressing your emotional wellbeing.

2. Understanding the Financial and Legal Landscape in 2025

The divorce process in England has evolved over the years. With changes such as the introduction of the no-fault divorce law under The Divorce, Dissolution, and Separation Act, the legal framework is now more streamlined. However, financial clarity remains crucial.

Key divorce trends in 2025:

  • Longer average timeframes: On average, the time to a conditional order in sole divorce cases is now around 36 weeks, with the full process from application to final order taking approximately 49 weeks. Joint divorce cases tend to be slightly quicker, with an average of 30 weeks to a conditional order and 43 weeks from application to final order.
  • Increase in divorces among older adults: The rise of “silver splitters” reflects changing attitudes toward relationships in later life.
  • Shifts in divorce applications: While January remains a peak month for divorce enquiries, overall divorce rates fluctuate based on factors such as economic pressures and societal trends.

At Fair Result, we emphasise the importance of financial preparedness. From property division to pensions, we help you navigate the complexities with transparency and clarity.

3. Fair Result’s Proven Step-by-Step Process

At Fair Result, we pride ourselves on offering a transparent, fixed-fee process designed to minimise stress and maximise efficiency. Here’s how our approach works:

a. Initial Consultation

We begin with a free consultation to understand your unique circumstances. During this meeting, we’ll identify your priorities and goals, laying the foundation for a tailored strategy that meets your needs.

b. Financial Assessment

Our team of legal and accountancy experts conducts a comprehensive review of your financial situation. With a commitment to transparency and fairness, our fixed-fee model ensures there are no unexpected surprises.

c. Tailored Strategy Development

Based on your goals, we develop a personalised plan that considers legal, financial, and emotional factors. This strategy ensures that you achieve a fair settlement while minimising unnecessary conflict.

d. Settlement Negotiations

We focus on  avoiding the need for lengthy court proceedings. Our team works tirelessly to negotiate a fair and efficient settlement.

e. Finalising Your Divorce

From managing paperwork to obtaining consent orders, we handle every legal requirement to finalise your divorce. Our goal is to ensure you’re fully equipped to move forward with confidence.

4. Client Success Stories

We’ve helped countless clients achieve fair outcomes and build brighter futures. Here’s just one example:

“After years of financial uncertainty during my separation, Fair Result gave me the clarity and support I needed. Their fixed-fee model meant no surprises, and their team made the process so much easier than I expected. Today, I’m not only financially secure but also confident about the future.”

These stories reflect our commitment to putting clients first, every step of the way.

5. Looking Ahead: Building Your Future Post-Divorce

Divorce is not the end—it’s the beginning of a new chapter. Planning for your future is key to moving forward with confidence.

Post-divorce planning tips:

  • Reassess your finances: Create a realistic budget that reflects your new circumstances.
  • Set personal goals: Whether it’s advancing your career, pursuing a passion, or focussing on your children, take steps toward achieving what matters most to you.
  • Seek support: Don’t hesitate to lean on professionals, friends, or family for guidance as you navigate your new life post-divorce.

At Fair Result, we’re here to ensure you leave the divorce process feeling prepared and empowered to embrace the next stage of your journey.

6. Trends and Insights for 2025

The festive season often prompts reflection, and many couples decide to take the next step in January, leading to a surge in divorce enquiries. Known as “Divorce Day,” the first working Monday of the year—6th January 2025—is anticipated to see a spike in divorce applications.

While divorce rates have fluctuated, certain trends stand out:

  • Coastal towns like Norwich and Hastings have the highest proportion of divorced individuals.
  • Most divorces occur between 3 and 8 years of marriage, with “silver splitters” on the rise.

These insights underscore the importance of working with experts who understand the unique challenges of today’s world. Find out more about divorce trends here.

Conclusion

Divorce doesn’t have to feel like an uphill battle. With Fair Result’s proven step-by-step process, you can navigate this challenging time with clarity, confidence, and support. Our fixed-fee, transparent approach allows you to focus on what truly matters: building a brighter future.

If you’re considering divorce in 2025, let us help you take the first step. Contact Fair Result for a free consultation today.

Read more articles by Chris Sweetman.

About Chris Sweetman

Chris Sweetman is an independent family solicitor and director of Fair Result – An award-winning law office who pride themselves on using innovative ways to help clients through the stress and complications of a marriage breakdown.

Chris can be contacted on 07500933818 or via email chris@fair-result.co.uk.

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