Director of Client Strategy
Family Legal Ltd (Mediate UK and C100Form.co.uk)
Losing contact with a grandchild can be painful. It can happen after a separation, a family fall-out or the death of a parent.
If you are searching for answers about grandparent’s rights in the UK, the starting point is this: in England and Wales, grandparents do not have an automatic legal right to see their grandchildren.
That can be difficult to hear. However, there are practical steps you can take, and in some circumstances grandparents can ask the Family Court to make an order about spending time with a grandchild.
Grandparents’ rights to see grandchildren: what does the law say?
Under the Children Act 1989, people with parental responsibility make important decisions about a child’s upbringing. Grandparents do not automatically have parental responsibility simply because they are grandparents.
When a dispute reaches court, the focus is on the individual child’s welfare and the circumstances of the relationship. The question is not simply what a grandparent or parent wants, but what arrangements are in the child’s best interests.
For many families, however, court does not need to be the first step. Communication and family mediation may provide an opportunity to rebuild contact without asking a judge to decide.
Can grandparents apply for a Child Arrangements Order?
Yes. A Child Arrangements Order can set out who a child lives with or spends time with.
However, unlike a parent who is entitled to apply, most grandparents first need permission from the court before making an application.
This means there can be two stages.
Stage one: asking the court for permission
This is sometimes called applying for “leave” of the court.
Under section 10(9) of the Children Act 1989, when considering whether to grant permission, the court considers factors including:
- the nature of the proposed application
- the applicant’s connection with the child
- any risk that the proposed application would disrupt the child’s life to such an extent that they would be harmed by it
There are circumstances in which a grandparent or other person may be entitled to apply without first obtaining permission, depending on the particular situation.
Stage two: the Child Arrangements Order application
If permission is required and granted, the court can then consider the application itself.
At this stage, the child’s welfare is the court’s focus. The court considers the individual circumstances before deciding whether an order should be made and what arrangements, if any, would be in the child’s best interests.
Permission to make an application does not mean that contact will automatically be ordered.
GOV.UK provides current information about applying for a court order concerning child arrangements and should be checked before starting an application.
Being refused contact with grandchildren: what can you do first?
Court will not be the right starting point for every family. There are several things you can consider before making an application.
1. Make a calm written approach
Consider writing a short and gentle letter, email or message to the child’s parent.
Try to avoid blame or reopening old arguments. Acknowledge that there may be difficult feelings and focus on the child.
Rather than immediately asking for extensive contact, you might suggest something small, such as a short visit, telephone call or video call.
2. Try family mediation
Family mediation is not limited to separating parents. It can also involve grandparents and other members of the extended family where appropriate.
Mediation gives family members a structured, private space to discuss what has happened, what the child needs and whether contact could restart in a way that everyone feels comfortable with.
The mediator remains impartial. They do not decide who is right or wrong and cannot force anyone to agree to contact.
Instead, they help everyone communicate and explore possible arrangements.
For example, families could discuss:
- how and when a grandparent sees the child
- telephone or video contact
- birthdays and special occasions
- school holidays
- rebuilding contact gradually after a long period apart
- communication between the parents and grandparents
- boundaries that everyone feels able to respect
Mediate UK provides grandparent mediation throughout England and Wales.
3. Attend a MIAM if you are considering court
A MIAM is a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting.
Before making many applications to the Family Court, including applications concerning child arrangements, an applicant will usually need to attend a MIAM unless an exemption applies.
The meeting takes place individually with a family mediator. The mediator explains mediation and other ways of resolving the disagreement and assesses whether mediation could be suitable.
A MIAM does not mean you have to mediate, and mediation itself remains voluntary.
4. Consider court if an agreement cannot be reached
If communication and mediation do not resolve the situation, a court application may be an option.
Before applying, check the latest GOV.UK information about the application process, MIAM requirements, court forms and fees.
Practical tip: keeping a simple, factual record of attempts to resolve the situation and any responses can be helpful. Avoid using it as a running account of arguments or accusations.
What should grandparents avoid doing?
When contact stops, frustration and upset are understandable. However, certain actions can increase conflict and make rebuilding the relationship more difficult.
Try to avoid:
- passing messages through the child
- asking the child to keep secrets
- posting about the disagreement on social media
- turning up at the child’s school, clubs or home without agreement
- criticising either parent in front of the child
- repeatedly contacting someone after they have asked for space
Keeping communication calm and focused on the child’s needs can give everyone a better chance of finding a way forward.
What about more difficult situations?
Grandparent’s rights after a parent dies
The death of a parent can change family relationships significantly.
If your son or daughter has died, maintaining a relationship with your grandchild may feel particularly important. Equally, the surviving parent and child may be dealing with grief and substantial changes to family life.
The general legal principles concerning grandparent contact continue to apply. Mediation may provide a sensitive setting in which to discuss whether and how the child’s relationship with the wider family can be maintained.
Estrangement between grandparents and parents
Sometimes the underlying problem is not the grandparent’s relationship with the child but their relationship with the child’s parent.
Where there has been a significant family fall-out, trying to resolve every historical disagreement before discussing the child can make progress difficult.
Mediation can help the adults focus specifically on future arrangements and boundaries.
Safeguarding concerns
If you believe a child is at immediate risk of harm, contact the police or the relevant local authority children’s services.
Where a child cannot remain in their parents’ care, different legal arrangements may need to be considered. These can include a Special Guardianship Order in appropriate circumstances.
This is a separate legal issue from an application simply seeking contact with a grandchild, so specialist legal advice may be appropriate.
How much does court cost and how long can it take?
Court fees can change. Check GOV.UK for the current fee for making a Child Arrangements Order application before applying.
People on a low income or with limited savings may qualify for help with court fees through the government’s Help with Fees scheme.
Legal costs are separate from the court fee if you choose to instruct a solicitor or barrister.
Court proceedings can also take time. Ministry of Justice statistics for January to March 2026 showed that private-law Children Act cases took an average of 35 weeks to reach a conclusion.
Mediation can often be arranged considerably sooner and gives family members the opportunity to work towards their own solution rather than having arrangements decided by a court.
Can grandparents get Legal Aid?
Legal Aid may be available for family mediation if you meet the eligibility requirements.
If you qualify, it can cover the cost of your MIAM and mediation. Different funding arrangements can apply depending on whether one or both participants qualify for Legal Aid.
Legal Aid for legal representation in private family court proceedings is much more limited and depends on the circumstances.
Mediate UK is a Legal Aid Agency contracted provider of family mediation. If you are unsure whether you might qualify, you can ask us about eligibility before booking.
Frequently asked questions
Do grandparents have legal rights to see their grandchildren in the UK?
Grandparents do not have an automatic legal right to see their grandchildren in England and Wales.
Most grandparents who want to make a Child Arrangements Order application must first ask the court for permission to apply. There are exceptions depending on the circumstances.
Can a parent stop grandparents seeing a grandchild?
In the absence of a court order, people with parental responsibility will generally make decisions about a child’s arrangements, including contact with other family members.
Where agreement cannot be reached, a grandparent may be able to ask the Family Court to consider the situation. The child’s welfare will be the court’s focus.
Do grandparents have to try mediation first?
If you intend to make a relevant Family Court application, you will usually need to attend a MIAM first unless an exemption applies.
Mediation itself is voluntary. Attending a MIAM does not mean that you or anyone else can be forced to mediate.
Can grandparents use family mediation?
Yes. Family mediation can involve grandparents and other members of the extended family where appropriate.
It can be particularly useful where everyone wants the child to maintain important family relationships but communication between the adults has broken down.
Can grandparents get Legal Aid for mediation?
Legal Aid for family mediation is means-tested. If you qualify, your MIAM and mediation may be funded.
Eligibility depends on your individual financial circumstances and other requirements.
Can Mediate UK help with grandparent contact?
If contact with your grandchildren has stopped, family mediation may provide a way to discuss the situation without immediately going to court.
Mediate UK provides grandparent mediation across England and Wales. Our mediators are registered with the Family Mediation Council and appointments are typically available within 48 hours.
We provide information about mediation and the family court process, but we do not provide legal advice. Where legal advice is needed, we can explain the options available to you.
Book a free 15-minute consultation to find out whether family mediation could help.
Call 0330 999 0959, email admin@mediateuk.co.uk, book through the Mediate UK website or speak to our AI chat assistant.
This article provides general information about family mediation and family law in England and Wales. It is not legal advice. The law in Scotland and Northern Ireland is different.
About Jess Knauf
Jess Knauf is Director of Client Strategy at Mediate UK and lead author at C100Form.co.uk. A Resolution member with over six years in family mediation, she specialises in C100 applications, MIAMs and child arrangements, and fact-checks all family law content across the site.
