I have divorced twice and in that I have had two totally different experiences.
After my first divorce I remember going into my boss’s office with my supervisor and a couple other staff members to ask for a few days to recoup. In that meeting I was informed that what I shared in that room would stay in that room, so I opened completely up and told everything and I mean every little detail.
Well a couple days later when I returned I was bombarded with questions of what happened, am I ok, awkward stares, glances that resembled a look of pity, and of course gossip. I remember that day wishing that there was another way I could have gone to my supervisors unidentified to ask for time off to recoup.
I was now humiliated and my trust now for those in that room at my job was broken along with my life that was already feeling broken.
Can you imagine going through a divorce and now having such a humiliated feeling that you decide to leave your job?
Well that happened to me I had to leave because that feeling sickened me daily as if I was so powerless over my life I had to have a pity party thrown by people every day who really didn’t know me outside of work.
Don’t get me started on the gossip, it was so out of hand I became severely depressed. The best way I can describe how I felt after these two life changing events was like two unstable molecules ready to react at a moment’s notice.
My advice to you is use wisdom and discernment in what you share especially those who are not close to you.
Your job is your professional workplace and the best advice I can give you is this.
If you are uncomfortable with a stranger at work finding out intimate details about your divorce do not do as I did and sit with multiple people to share these details at work.
Do not underestimate the destructive havoc that gossip can impose on your life in the workplace setting.
After her second divorce, Charis decided that it was time to do something not only for herself but also for other women going through similar struggles.
As a survivor of divorce, Charis knows all about the lies and confusion that come with divorce. Though divorce does eventually end, the emotional scars and stress that come with a difficult divorce do not.
Charis is passionate about speaking the truth to women who are caught in the endless cycle of struggle after divorce and she encourages them to share their stories to help provide not only counseling for themselves but also support for others.
Charis does not limit her time to Draw for Women but also reaches out in other ways.
She is an accomplished and published author, having penned God Rarest Diamonds: A Proverbs Life after Divorce Devotional for women and Coming Soon- The 30 Day Life after Divorce Prayer Challenge for Women, which provides encouragement, support, and spiritual enlightenment to those who are struggling, helping readers bring peace to their life journeys. In addition to Draw for Women and writing,
Charis has a personal life that is as full as her professional life.
Charis is married to a wonderful man and is the mother of two talented and beautiful daughters.
Charis earned her Bachelor’s Degree in Business Technical Management with a concentration in Small Business and Entrepreneurship- Magna Cum Laude in Spring of 2016 and is currently pursuing her MBA.
When she is not working or studying, Charis loves to read, write, and travel. Charis is a dedicated individual who wants nothing more than to share her ideas, experiences, and knowledge to help other women who are struggling with divorce to become comfortable with themselves and with the state of their lives again.
Twitter: Charis Rooks @draw4women