Sensuality is a luscious word, take your time as you say it: sen-su-al-ity, and luxuriate over each syllable. Just like when you’re eating something delicious, you slowly savour each morsel to make it last that bit longer.
Being sensual is feeling connected to the present. As you focus your attention on any one of your senses, you can allow yourself to become absorbed in the moment; listen to the sound of your breathing, open your eyes wider and notice the thousands of colours or feel the touch of whatever’s at the end of your fingertips. Even for 30 seconds you’ll notice it’s remarkably easy to draw your attention inwards.
I photograph women who are transitioning, transforming and loving themselves even more. Each has a different reason for choosing boudoir but there is a common thread; they’re doing something for themselves. Which is extremely empowering.
Here are my 5 Secrets of Sensuality, I invite you to choose one or all of them to play with, to have fun with, add your own, make up your way of experiencing them. What do you notice, how do you feel, what are you saying to yourself?
Sensuality Secret No.1 – Be engaged
Secret no.1 means committing yourself to the moment. I’ve learned that that level of engagement takes practice also it’s not necessary to be engrossed all the time, we do need a break. Washing up should still be a time to fantasise yourself sipping strawberry daquiris in your luxury Ibizan villa.
Here’s a suggestion for you, practice by choosing activities that you enjoy. It sounds simple, because it is. I’ve begun Crossfit training, it is the first exercise programme I’ve found where my mind stays with my body and what it’s doing, I leave feeling energised, supercharged. It’s incredible! I love it. When I’m shooting someone, I get completely absorbed, finish tired, yet feel awakened.
What do you do to fully engage?
Sensuality Secret No.2 – Be aware
Of what is around you and surround yourself with what pleases your eye. Nature is the obvious choice, however, I’d like to invite you to take a closer look at home.
As a photographer, I see ‘pictures’ everywhere, I have a way of seeing, unusual shapes, shadows, reflections and textures. I’m also always touching things: flowers, furniture, walls, displays, it connects me to my world.
Identify with what is around you. Home is an excellent place to start. I had a clear out recently which reintroduced me to many things I’d ‘forgotten’ I owned, it triggered pleasant memories. Souvenirs I’d bought, photographs stored in boxes of my younger children.
When was the last time you picked up a photograph or object in your home and studied it, allowed yourself to go to a pleasing memory? Take a simple trip around the home you have built for yourself and love what you have created.
Sensuality Secret No.3 – Be Playful
Did you do this as a child, spin around until you got so dizzy you’d let yourself collapse on the floor? I used to love doing it on the grass in the park, twirling around looking up at the sky as it got blurrier and blurrier with my arms outstretched.
I noticed a little girl about 6 years old in a restaurant where I was sharing a meal with my husband. The girl was spinning around and around, in her own world, silently playing. She was a picture of beauty.
Secret no.3 encourages you to let the playful you come out. What would you do? Skip, have a little rough and tumble, sing at the top of your lungs?
Sensuality Secret No.4 – Be uninhibited
Have you ever been to a workshop, class, or event where you’ve wanted to contribute to the discussion but shrunk instead? As a nation we are embarrassed aren’t we? It starts when we’re teenagers, and can sometimes continue into adulthood, and cause us problems when we want to express ourselves.
Choosing secret no.4, to be uninhibited is an invitation to stop censoring yourself. Give yourself the voice to speak up, throw your head back and laugh outrageously, let go on the dance floor and really feel the music pulsating through your body.
Sensuality Secret No.5 – Be sexy
Sexy is definitely not just for the bedroom. It’s a state of mind. The biggest sex organ is the brain, doesn’t that make sense? Being sexy is choosing how you think about your sexual, sensual self. Sexy is about confidence, pride, courage, laughter.
Sexy is in the way you move, the tone of your voice, and the thoughts in your head.
Sexy is whenever you choose.
Secret no.5 combines all my 5 Secrets of Sensuality, they’re simply states of mind, you can access them any time, by choosing how you think, it’ll change how you feel and connect you to your sensual self.
How will you interpret my 5 Secrets of Sensuality? What ways do you engage with your sensual self?
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