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How Long Does It Take to Get Divorced and Where Do I Start?
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How Long Does It Take to Get Divorced and Where Do I Start?

Published on
Chris Sweetman
Chris Sweetman
Director
Fair Results

When considering divorce the first question people often ask themselves is “how long will it take and where do I start?”

Whilst this will most likely be one of the most stressful periods of your life, with very sensible and practical considerations, you can begin a new, and much happier chapter in your life.

In today’s article, Chris Sweetman will be answering those questions and helping you understand how to initiate divorce proceedings.

No-Fault Divorce and the impact on the divorce process

Since April 2022, the whole idea of blame has been removed from divorce. Unreasonable behaviour, length of separation and adultery are all things in the past of acrimonious divorces.

Now, the process has been made much simpler so the separating parties can focus on the most important part of the divorce, including sorting out the finances and ensuring any children are still the number one focus between separating parents.

So now blame has gone, the new process allows for both parties to agree that the marriage has broken down and apply jointly for the divorce – you can still make a solo application if you want, but the new process allows for both.

Whether you apply jointly or individually, the time scales for the divorce process is the same – which takes a minimum of 26 weeks from the date of application to the final order being granted by the court service and your marriage being formally dissolved.

What is the process for divorce?

The process starts with an application, now done online, to the HMCTS Court Service portal. The court receives the application and then issues a notice to the parties for them to acknowledge the divorce process has been commenced.

Once the court is satisfied and both parties are aware the divorce has been applied for, the case must go into a 20-week holding period before a conditional order can be applied for. The thinking behind this is to give the couple one last chance to have a period to reflect on whether they do want to finally end the marriage. In all my years of being involved with the law, I have never come across a couple who in this holding period (in the new regime or previously between Nisi and Absolute) who decide they have fallen back in love again and decide to pull out of the divorce process – but the option is there at this stage.

This 20-week period should be used to effectively sort out financial arrangements and plans for the children. In simple cases, this timetable can often be kept to, but where family finances are a little more complicated and need further investigation, the timetable may slip until all matters are fully resolved.

From experience, the newly drafted divorce process should have been firmer when changing the law last year and say this 20-week period is fixed and all divorces must be concluded within the timetable. My thinking for this is that the flexibility on this period still allows lawyers to drag their feet which only has the impact of driving up costs for clients.

My preference would have been for family finances to have been resolved and then the divorce applied for. Focus the lawyers on resolving the finances quickly and efficiently and then proceed with the divorce.

Once the 20-week period has elapsed, the parties can apply for the conditional, order of divorce which is the beginning of the end road to divorce. The conditional order is granted by the court service and then another 6-week holding period is entered into before the Final order can be applied for dissolving the marriage.

Once the Final order is issued by the court and again this can be applied for online, the marriage is over, and parties are free to get on with the rest of their lives however they wish to.

Final thoughts

So now you know the process of a divorce and the steps you need to take.

You can certainly apply for a divorce yourself – it’s a relatively straightforward process online. But what you need to do, is take some expert advice about the implications of divorce on your children and the division of your marital finances. The divorce process is simple, sorting out life’s complications’ can be more difficult.

Ensure all issues surrounding the division of finances are sorted before the Final Order for divorce is granted, as once this is granted resolving the distribution of marital assets can be more complicated.

Do not forget to talk to an independent lawyer who can provide you with expert advice on all your rights, as they can provide you with guidance on the way the law looks to distribute financial assets and how the court would look to deal with disputed plans for the children.

Most importantly, work with your ex-partner to resolve all matters as amicably as possible – as it will save both parties time, money, and heartache.

Work with your ex-partners lawyers if they have them in a collaborative way to avoid stress and conflict. And be realistic about what you want to achieve in the whole divorce process.

Click here for more articles from Fair Results

About Chris Sweetman

Chris Sweetman is an independent family solicitor and director of Fair Result – An award-winning law office who pride themselves on using innovative ways to help clients through the stress and complications of a marriage break down.

Chris can be contacted on 07500933818 or via email chris@fair-result.co.uk.

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What are the Possible Consequences of Divorce?

Published on
Nigel C Winter - Partner in the Family Department of Rawlison Butler solicitors
Nigel C Winter – Partner in the Family Department of Rawlison Butler solicitors

In the first of a series of articles rb’s Family Law team look at the impact of divorce upon children, a family’s finances and in this article the individuals concerned.

One of the biggest problems of a relationship breakdown is who to talk to.

Frequently the parties rely upon friends or associates who have been through a relationship breakdown and this can often be one of the most misleading sources.

Research shows that groups of friends who have couples going through relationship breakdown are often affected by this.

Furthermore single sex groups often have a particular “spin” on the consequences or in some cases what they would like others to perceive as the “benefits” of their own separation.

The reality is far more complex. It is also clear that considerable thought should be given before taking this significant step, as the impact continues far longer than people often realise.

One thing that the research does show is that stable relationships are beneficial.

Whatever the short term benefits of leaving a relationship that isn’t perceived as working, the parties tend to experience social isolation and irregular contact with their children.

Although a separation may be seen as the panacea to all of the relationships problems, after the initial parting, loneliness and unhappiness can often follow. In the “sober light of morning” parties often indicate that they remain deeply attached to their partners even when the legal ties have been broken.

Notwithstanding the above, some people are better able to handle separation and divorce than others.

Those that emerge happier are those who come from high conflict or even violent relationships. Furthermore those that embrace the significant changes in their lives and work on maintaining old friendships or establishing new ones fair much better.

Although parties going through divorce may indicate that they are happier, that may be because of other factors such as their financial position.

That financial position will dictate the lifestyle that they have hereafter and research has found that people with greater personal resources, including a higher income or higher level of education cope so much better.

This makes sense when one considers that two parties to a marriage/relationship are shouldering the burden of family life together and upon breakdown those responsibilities can be doubled.

Furthermore modest resources which are divided between two people often leave lower income families with insufficient to meet even their most basic needs.

It therefore appears that divorce, like marriage or relationships does depend upon each individual family and their own particular circumstances.

However, when people receive informal advice they often don’t factor in the subtle differences in situations between the person giving the advice and the person receiving it. In blunt terms, a lady who has a choice of homes to live in after divorce is going to find life so much easier than one who is only entitled to 50% of the proceeds of sale from a “two up two down”.

Therefore, there is a very real danger that in a social setting an individual contemplating separation will receive all the wrong advice.

Despite what anyone tells you, when you separate you do not go back to leading the carefree easy life of a twenty-one year old! It is not an endless party because everyone else has moved on and social isolation often follows.

Day to day to activities of home, work and childcare are more difficult to carry out alone. Support networks change, sometimes because it is perceived that you will be requiring more from the network than you can possibly contribute yourself.

Furthermore divorced individuals often find they have less in common with their married friends and some have reported that they are even a threat to the stability of their married friends’ relationships.

In relationships where there are children there have been great changes in recent years. For example the proportion of single fathers raising their own children has tripled in a generation.

Whilst mothers were able to manage a work/life balance in a relationship they find it difficult after separation to be successful at home and work without even considering the prospect of a social life.

One fact that is startling and unforeseen is the degree of dependency upon ex-partners or ex-spouses. Many concede privately that they remain emotionally dependent upon the other even when a divorce or separation is concluded.

Research is showing that whilst a Court can divide up property and other responsibilities such as child care, it cannot decree an emotional clean break.

Few of these factors are easy to convey in a social setting. However it is better that they are properly considered before making a final decision, rather than having to reflect upon the consequences in solitude.

About Nigel

Nigel C Winter is a partner in the Family Department of Rawlison Butler Solicitors, based in the South East of England. He has been practicing family law for over two decades, is a collaborative lawyer and a regular contributor to a wide variety of publications on Divorce and Family Law.

He has been practicing family law for over 2 decades, is a Collaborative lawyer and a regular contributor to a wide variety of publications on divorce and family law.

 

Did you know? There are online videos at:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKsjD1sqe-U

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Divorce Story – Dealing with Separating from Partners with Borderline Personality Disorder

Published on
Women and Divorce
Wendi Schuller
Author of
The Global Guide to Divorce

Two men that broke up with women who have Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) share their experiences and advice.

One got a divorce and the other had great difficulty disentangling himself from his girlfriend.

Both of the women tried to stop the break ups which seemed to trigger their fear of abandonment.

Jeff who is a martial arts instructor, reached his limit of tolerance and consulted with a highly recommended Family Law Firm. He was asked if he wanted a solicitor who was nurturing and would hold his hand all through proceedings.

The other choice was an avenger who was no nonsense. He chose the second one and asked if she had dealings with anyone with BPD.

Jeff cautions others to ensure that a potential legal representative is experienced with BPD cases. His solicitor kept emotion out of divorce for both him and the wife’s solicitor. Although a bit like a robot, she was effective and controlled proceedings in a matter-of-fact tone.

They both agreed that litigation was the best type of divorce for this situation. He did not want to be in a room with his spouse and wanted a judge to preside over proceedings.

They had a rocky marriage from the start, however Jeff stuck it out to be a good step-dad to Tara’s son. They had bought an expensive car when married, and Tara insisted upon receiving that one during the division of personal property. Jeff got the ancient one.

The step-son called Jeff and demanded that he turn his car over to him so he could get to school. Jeff refused as he needed his car for work. His mum did not want to take over Jeff’s former task of doing the school runs. Although he realized that his wife was using her son as a pawn in their divorce, Jeff questions how close he and the boy really were.

Jeff advises to keep kids out of proceedings and tell them that they are not messengers. Have your solicitor put an end to the other parent using youngsters as a tool, to try and get more from the divorce.

Jeff’s solicitor made sure he had meticulous financial records to cut down on arguments and false claims by the other side. Tara tried to have Jeff pay her £1000/month for his business. The solicitor quickly said that if she made a claim, that would also entail taking on his debt. It was dropped.

Partners with Borderline Personality Disorder Looking back, Jeff wished he had paid more attention to husband number one, who stated he was terrified of Tara.

In another case, Jim dated a women with Borderline Personality Disorder who was clingy and shunned him when he supposedly did something wrong.

She wanted others to be on her side and keep Jim attached to her. Amy would stop by Jim’s hair salon and bring him unplanned lunches. This was disruptive to his clients when he was in the middle of treatments. When Jim was backing away, Amy would try to hook him in with an unusual amount of sex.

People with BPD have impulsive behaviour and Amy was having multiple affairs.  When Jim would attempt to end their relationship, Amy acted so sweet, that he gave her another chance. It finally became too much when Jim felt he was a prisoner and Amy was keeping friends and family away. Amy had met with a therapist, but decided not to continue.

We planned his exit strategy. I told him to read about BPD with the probability that Amy also was narcissistic. This new knowledge empowered him to set boundaries.

Jim told Amy he was definitely through and there would be no going back. He made it clear that his apartment and work place were off limits. He explained the situation to his landlord who then changed the locks. Jim told neighbours not to let Amy into their flats or give out any information to her.

His co-workers were on board and would not accept food, presents, notes or anything from Amy. They were not to let her linger either. If Jim was there, he told her calmly and without emotion, to leave or he would call the police. Jim blocked her number from his cell and let calls to the business phone go to message first.

Friends and family were apprised of the situation and did not reveal anything to Amy if she contacted them. It was a community effort to help set boundaries, but after several months she started to drift away. Jim said the big thing was holding firm to boundaries and having others to support him in this endeavour.

People with Borderline Personality Disorder can have successful marital and parental relationships, although in these two cases the women declined therapy.

Breaking free from with someone with BPD can be difficult, so enlist others for help. Document any harassment in case you need a restraining order. Talking with a life coach may be invaluable for helping you plan your departure and getting on with life.

ABOUT WENDI

Wendi Schuller is a nurse, hypnotherapist and is certified in Neuro-linguistic Programing (NLP).

Her most recent book is The Global Guide to Divorce and she has over 200 published articles.

She is a guest on radio programs in the US and UK. Her website is globalguidetodivorce.com.

 

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New Arbitration Scheme for Children’s Issues

Children and Divorce – The Pros and Cons of the New Arbitration Scheme for Children’s Issues

Published on
Antony Ball, Head of hlw Keeble Hawson Doncaster Family Team.
Antony Ball,
Head of hlw Keeble Hawson Doncaster
Family Team.

A new form of arbitration scheme to keep family disputes out of court has been introduced by the Institute of Family Law Arbitrators (IFLA) from 1st August.

The Family Law Arbitration Children Scheme extends the Family Arbitration Scheme, which has been in place since 2012 to offer a way of resolving the financial and property issues that can arise quicker, privately and more cost-effectively.

With a less formal and daunting setting than a court, an independent arbitrator is appointed to make a decision.  They remain in place throughout proceedings and ex-partners decide together how, where and when the process unfolds. Among choices are whether sessions are held face-to-face or in writing only – and the areas arbitration is required on.

It makes sense that this less confrontational option to a courtroom battle has now been extended to issues concerning children – usually the most emotive area of any breakup.

Although the new process is not suitable in every case, it can be applied to resolving most issues about the welfare of children and parental responsibility. These include where they live, how much time they should spend with each parent and relocation within England and Wales.

As in other family arbitration, the arbitrator bases their decision on relevant facts and evidence – taking into account the views of both parties. The decision is final and binding on both parents.

The development has been welcomed for offering couples the benefits of the broader arbitration process – resolving disputes about parental responsibility more informally, rapidly and cost-effectively than in court.

And it certainly could be speedier and more convenient than litigation. Written evidence alone can be entered if both parties agree; financial and children’s matters – which are often inextricably linked – can be dealt with together; ex-spouses can select the arbitrator together; and hearings held at times to suit both.

These are all important ingredients to minimising conflict and resolving disputes amicably – which can only be in the best interests of the children.

However, while children’s arbitration can be cheaper and less stressful than prolonged court battles, whether it is more cost-effective in the long-run remains to be seen.

For example, a court fee is likely to cost less than appointing an arbitrator. Also, if a report is needed to establish the children’s wishes, the couple would have to instruct and pay for an independent social worker under the arbitration scheme.

In most court proceedings, the Children and Family Court Advisory and Support Service (Cafcass), which looks after the interests of children in family proceedings, would prepare this without cost.

Remember, there is no ‘one-size-fits-all’ best solution and couples should always seek professional advice on which route is best for their particular circumstances.

About Antony Ball

Qualifying as a solicitor in 2000, Antony joined hlw Keeble Hawson in 2010 to lead the Doncaster family team. He is a member of Resolution, an organisation of family lawyers, and the Law Society Children Panel – and always seeks to establish the best approach for the particular needs of each client.

With a strong commitment to establishing a non-confrontational approach to settling family disputes, some 20% of his workload now involves collaborative methods.

He can be contacted at on 01302 380225 or antonyball@hlwkeeblehawson.co.uk

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family mediation case study

Family Mediation – A Case Study

Published on
Paul Sandford
Paul Sandford
Mediator and
Tribunal Judge

A dispute between a couple who divorced five years ago but where there have been ongoing difficulties between them

Frankie and Johnny were married for five years during which time they had two children, John and Jane who are now aged 10 and 12.

Initially they were very happy but five years ago a combination of economic and social factors, coupled with Frankie’s strong but incorrect suspicions that her husband was being unfaithful resulted in a very acrimonious divorce.

Although at that time their solicitors gave them balanced, sensible advice they fought bitterly over a range of financial issues.

They also argued extensively about how often they should each be able to spend time with John and Jane. Outwardly at least they resolved these issues. However, this was partly because they were both emotionally drained and partly because they had run up very large legal bills and just wanted to get things over and done with.

Although Frankie and Johnny were in principle prepared to work within the framework that their divorce settlement provided, they had not managed to resolve any of their personal differences and to date there has been a lot of ill disguised resentment on both sides.

This is particularly true of Johnny who had reluctantly agreed to sign the family home over to Frankie and now has to live in unsatisfactory and quite costly rented accommodation.

Because the children live with Frankie and only stay with him at weekends, he feels that his ex-wife is calling all the shots and that he is little more than what he terms “a meal provider”.

Frankie is not prepared to be at all flexible, interprets the settlement provisions about Johnny’s contact with the children very literally and repeatedly makes hurtful remarks to him.

Johnny retaliates by badmouthing Frankie in front of John and Jane even though it upsets them and is invariably late in making maintenance payments.

Each and every time they meet, Frankie and Johnny row, often in public or in front of the children. Frankie’s mother, Daphne, who has never liked Johnny and whom he considers to be an interfering busybody becomes involved and repeatedly criticises him in front of the children.

Recently, two or three mutual friends in whom Frankie and Johnny have both confided decided that enough was enough and strongly suggested that they go to family mediation.

family mediation case study
Family Mediation – A Case Study

Ostensibly, the purpose of the mediation is for them to revisit the question of how often Johnny sees John and Jane and to consider John’s stated wish that he has more say in his children’s upbringing, particularly their education.

Subsequently, in the process of initially speaking to Frankie and Johnny individually to see whether mediation is appropriate, it becomes apparent to the mediator, Angela, that although at first glance the original divorce settlement appears to have been quite sensible, in reality there are lots of unresolved issues. She initially suggests four sessions but because a lot of progress is made matters are resolved in three.

During their first session, Frankie and Johnny barely speak to one another.

However, once they have grasped that their mediator is not there to impose a settlement on them, they both privately concede that the other is “not all bad”. They both realise that for the first time they have the opportunity to speak to one another with facilitation from an objective, independent third party who is not a lawyer or a counsellor and is prepared to listen and to help them try to reach a settlement that they will both be comfortable with.

In subsequent sessions they are more focused. Johnny concedes that Frankie is a good mother and that it is in John and Jane’s best interests to live with her.

However, he asks her to acknowledge that he is doing his best in difficult circumstances, that he bitterly resents her suggestions of past infidelity on his part, and that his wish to play a more active role in the children’s day-to-day lives is genuine.  He also politely but very strongly suggests that Daphne stops interfering, something that in truth Frankie agrees with.

Having listened to Johnny, Frankie takes a step back. She acknowledges Johnny’s views and agrees that she will try to rein Daphne in.

The net effect is that although Frankie and Johnny do not resolve their personal differences, they agree that they have to put John and Jane first and that they have to try and be more civil with one another. Frankie agrees to be a little more flexible about access arrangements and to keep in touch with Johnny in order to discuss things such as the children’s schooling with him.

In turn Johnny agrees that unless there are any genuine difficulties he will make any required financial payments on time. Both agree that they will keep financial and other issues under review.

Frankie and Johnny liaise with their solicitors and decide not to request the court to make a consent order amending the order made at the time of their divorce. Instead with their solicitors’ help they record their revised agreement in correspondence.

The obvious benefit resulting from Frankie and Johnny going to mediation and entering into a written agreement is that John and Jane are much happier and feel much more secure.

Their parents have effectively saved themselves a good deal of anguish and upset and feel better able to get on with their lives. They have established some lines of communication and because they have to some extent accepted their own failings they are better placed to be civil to one another Their acrimonious feelings about one another do not melt away but they have at the very least agreed to disagree about such matters and they are able to put their animosities to one side.

Paul Sandford is an accredited civil mediator,  family mediator and Tribunal Judge

He mediates for a leading UK charity, has been appointed a governor/mediator at a London Secondary School and has the benefit of having worked as a solicitor for around 25 years.  He has also worked as a trainer and university lecturer and has considerable experience of working with people who are disabled or who do not have English as a first language.

As well as being Regents University accredited, Paul recently completed ADRg civil/commercial and family training and is working towards becoming an accredited family mediator.

He has particular  knowledge and experience of housing, property/commercial, medical and public law issues and employment, workplace, family and educational disputes. He is a member of two mediation panels: Clerksroom, which has excellent conference call facilities, and the Business Mediation Group. In his spare time Paul enjoys cooking, football, test cricket and listening to the blues, and fundraises for his school.

[All names changed]

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divorce online dispute resolution
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UK to Get Online Dispute Resolution in Spring

Published on
Terrence_Trainor_-_Fletcher_Day
Terrence Trainor – Head of Family Law at Fletcher Day.

This spring is set to see the launch of the UK’s first online dispute resolution (ODR) service.

The service is being launched by Relate, one of the UK’s largest support providers for those experiencing relationship issues.

The system will be aimed at couples who are going through divorce or separation, and will aim to offer them a new way of resolving their disputes.

As well as offering the convenience and efficiency of an online service, Relate’s new ODR system aims to be less confrontational and adversarial than traditional methods of resolving a dispute during a divorce.

Modria, a specialist in ODR systems based in the USA, has developed the platform. Modria previously built a similar system for use in the Netherlands, the Rechtwijzer, which was the first dispute resolution platform of its kind anywhere in Europe.

The Rechtwijzer provides couples with easy access to legal advice and support along with tools for “self-help” in negotiating a settlement.

The platform ultimately leads couples to a valid, legally-binding agreement with minimal need for professional intervention. The system has currently been in operation for around a year, and has been praised for its considerable success in relieving pressure on the legal system while offering couples an accessible and practical alternative dispute resolution method.

online dispute resolution
Online dispute resolution – less confrontational

The system that Modria has created for Relate will be similar in many ways to the Dutch system but, unlike the Rechtwijzer, has not benefited from any government funding. Rather, Relate has raised the money necessary to develop the system through a number of different channels, and continue to seek additional funding in order to improve the system in the future with additional features and functionality. In particular, Relate hopes to make the system one that can be safely accessed and used by children.

The new ODR platform, which has also received input from prominent family law organisation Resolution, is described by Relate as a “single point of access for information and support for all families before, during, and after separation.” Joe Korner, Relate’s Director of Policy and Communications, also described the system as “a one-stop shop for people going through separation.”

In particular, Korner pointed to the fact that “there is nothing in the system which actually requires the involvement of mediators or lawyers – it is a technology-facilitated negotiation process.” However, he also went on to point out that couples will also have access to legal advice and support, including trained mediators, either online or offline if they have trouble settling things entirely through the use of the automated system.

Currently, Resolution plans to initially carry out a “soft” roll-out of the system in the spring. This will then be followed by twelve months of continued development and improvement, after which it is hoped the software will be ready to be made “available to everyone.”

This article was contributed by Terrence Trainor, Head of Family Law at Fletcher Day.

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family arbitration

Is Family Arbitration a Flash in the Pan?

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Suzy Miller www.thedivorcemagazine.co.ukIt seems clear that Family Arbitration has something to offer in the divorce arena, but will it be adopted by the legal profession as another tool in the divorce tool-box – or be quietly left in a cupboard to be brought into the light only by a small band of hard-core enthusiasts?

It does have some limitations – currently, Arbitration cannot be used to decide children matters.

“Arbitration is certainly …a huge untapped resource at the moment… it can determine financial matters be it a discrete issue such as the level of maintenance or all issues as to financial/property settlement between spouses or unmarried couples…. It is not yet used for matters relating to the welfare of the children.” Olive McCarthy, Breeze & Wyles

Yet – according to Family Arbitrator, Sir Peter Singer – there are some who predict that as a logical development the Family Court judiciary will support this when English private children law principles are applied by experienced and trained family practitioners.

“They point to the fact that child issues are already arbitrated under Scotland’s version of the IFLA Scheme, and anticipate a parallel development south of the border.” Sir Peter Singer

Is Family Arbitration inherently part of an adversarial process?

From legal minds I have heard the viewpoint that Arbitration is inherently ’adversarial’, because it involves someone else making a decision on behalf of the couple.

But personally – as well as in my role as the Alternative Divorce Guide – I see an enormous difference between a couple in mediation mutually agreeing to instruct a highly qualified person to make a decision on a financial issue, which the couple are unable to resolve themselves – and then to continue on with the mediation process – rather than the alternative.

That alternative can often be that the couple give up on their mediation process and go to court, where the mediation agreements to date might be disregarded by the judge. High costs, more inconvenience and greater emotional trauma for the whole family will often ensue.

Because Arbitration keeps the couple ‘in control’ of the process, that in itself should encourage a greater level of communication and cooperation, compared to if they are throwing letters at each other via separate solicitors.

Christopher Pocock QC sees Arbitration as an empowering process for clients: “If you start the arbitration process and then agree, or agree part, that is fine – the arbitration is your process, so insofar as you agree something, it happens”.

Is Family Arbitration just for the rich?

But paying for your own ‘private judge’ – is that something that most ordinary people will be able to afford, or to access? Sir Peter Singer believes that Arbitration is accessible to most people navigating divorce:

“I would like to emphasise that arbitration is not just for the rich and famous: it offers many of the same advantages to Mr and Mrs Average as to those whose net worth is high. And amongst the 130 or so MCIArb qualified arbitrators there is a range of talent and experience and a spread of geographical availability which puts them within the range of most any couple otherwise headed for court.” Sir Peter Singer, Family Dispute Resolution Facilitator and Arbitrator (MCIArb)

“Arbitration is the way forward, the benefits are huge for clients particularly the costs. In the last year, some of the most eminent members of the profession agreed to fix the costs of achieving an award for £1,500 plus Vat – that’s £750 per person in straight forward cases. So strong is the belief and commitment to this scheme, Arbitrators were prepared to effectively “put their money where their mouth is” in making this offer.” Olive McCarthy, Breeze & Wyles

So is Family Arbitration being taken seriously?

Is Family Arbitration
Is Family Arbitration just for the rich?

Arbitration is being taken seriously by judges – perhaps because it has the potential to release some of the burden of litigants clogging up the courts.

The arbitration process for financial disputes in general and the IFLA Scheme in particular has received important endorsement from the President, who heads the Family Division, in a case he decided earlier this year: S v S.

He made it clear that in normal circumstances a court should be swift to confirm an arbitrator’s award in a court order, and to preserve the confidentiality of the process so that individuals and their financial arrangements will be kept free of press or public comment.

Further impressive support since that decision has come from the Financial Remedies Advisory Group’s report at the end of July which, amongst other things, recommended that the President should issue Guidance specifically directed to arbitration and produced a draft which is currently the subject of consultation.

The convenience factor

Perhaps it is the flexibility and convenience of Arbitration that will make it popular with busy professionals who just don’t have the time to battle out their divorce in the court room, let alone the desire for all that additional stress and misery.

“The Arbitration process is flexible in relation to timing. No need to wait for the court to appoint a judge when it suits the court diary. Family Arbitrators are likely to be able to arrange their diaries to suit the parties. So this means late sittings or even weekend sittings. So the couple are not faced with having to come back on an adjourned hearing in 2 or 3 months’ time because the judge is not willing to sit after 4-30.” Martin Loxley, Partner Irwin Mitchell LLP

Who needs to be convinced first – the public – or the legal profession?

Not only do the public need to understand the benefits of Family Arbitration, but so do family lawyers – as it is another tool in the divorce tool-box that can benefit their clients. It’s usefulness is too immense to be disregarded. According to Sir Mathew Thorpe, Arbitration could be one of the most significant developments in the field of dispute resolution…. Ever.

“The creation of the Institute of Family Law Arbitrators in 2012 provides couples with the opportunity to choose arbitration regulated by Arbitration Rules and affiliated to the Chartered Institute of Arbitrators. There has been no more significant development in the history of Family ADR.” Sir Mathew Thorpe

I feel that a process that can add to the empowerment of a couple navigating divorce, by becoming an additional resource to call on during the mediation process if and when required – rather than to take their power away and hand it all over to a judge – has got to be a process worth taking seriously.

“I am quite sure that Arbitration is the future. The court system is woefully underfunded and it is going to all but collapse under the weight of litigants in person.

Family Arbitration provides a flexible and cost-efficient means of resolving disputes.  There is no “one size fits all” approach; the nature and number of hearings is tailored to the particular case.

Family Arbitration can deal effectively with all cases, from those where absolutely everything is in dispute to those where only a few minor issues remain.

It is ideal for those cases where the parties wish to retain control over the timing and cost of the process but nevertheless need someone to decide the case – or parts of it – for them.  The procedure being tailored to each individual case, it is extremely time and cost efficient.” David Walden-Smith MCIArb, Barrister & Family Arbitrator

For more information regarding Family Arbitration, refer to the IFLA website: ifla.org.uk.

Suzy Miller creator of the Alternative Divorce Guide and the Living Together Agreement

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why work with a divorce lawyer
Divorces are extremely stressful and they can be further complicated when children are involved.
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Why Work with a Divorce Lawyer

Published on
C&W LeeMarston
Lee Marston, Partner at Clough & Willis.

 

The doing away with Legal Aid has courted much controversy in the media, across the legal community and for those people who have been affected by its demise.

This has been coupled with a government sponsored push to drive compulsory Mediation Information Assessment Meetings (MIAMs) for those who are involved in a family dispute such as a divorce or a child custody case.

On the face of it, this is a typical – and sweeping – government tick-box exercise:

 

 
~ Cut the Legal Aid Bill? TICK

~ Push people towards taking up mediation in order to de-clutter the crowded court system? TICK

~ The only losers are the lawyers, so no public sympathy there? TICK

Well, no…. the reality isn’t the above as life isn’t as simple as the cosseted few who sit in the Westminster Village think it is.

In terms of non criminal or immigration Legal Aid work,  the governments’ spend was small potatoes – especially as a significant sum was recovered by getting a charge on property or receiving back costs from cash recovered/ preserved by the assisted person.

In children cases this was not the norm; but, like in financial claims, the application for public funding was still subject to a merits and means test. That way, the deserving and vulnerable received help and could be represented.

Before an application can be made to court for a divorce or child custody case, clients are now required to attend a MIAM.

The aim of the meeting is to see if mediation could be used to resolve their difficulties, rather than going straight to court.

Despite MIAMs being compulsory, there has been a dramatic reduction in take up – mainly because clients have not seen a lawyer who can make them aware of their choices.

The government’s new approach and its focus on mediation assumes:

~ That every person in a relationship is equal in strength and knowledge

why work with a divorce lawyer
Why work with a divorce lawyer? Divorces are extremely stressful and they can be further complicated when children are involved.

~ That there will be no problem establishing true disclosure for an informed decision

~ That there will be no problems agreeing the value of properties or shares

~ That there will be a reasonable approach to the financial need of the financially weaker party

~ That everyone knows the likely reaction of an existing mortgagee to a proposed agreement

~ That the implications of everyone tied to an existing mortgage are the same

~ That a mediator is someone who can give sound information as to the likely realms of a settlement

I would question every one of the above as I am increasingly coming across what I feel are under settled potential agreements. The fact of the matter is that people require the strength and expertise of a specialist family lawyer on their team.

Solicitors ensure full and frank disclosure and provide expert advice on settlement. By having that knowledge and experience on side, clients can make an informed decision; especially as all advice is tailored by a cost/ benefit analysis. That is, at each stage, comparing likely court imposed settlement to an offer made and balancing that with what further legal costs might be incurred.

Mediation can, of course, work if everyone involved is open, honest and trustworthy and as long as one party is not able to pressurise or browbeat the other.

However, the onus is now on the stretched Judiciary to mediate and impose its views, but this isn’t feasible due to the time it has available and the increasing number of litigants in person (an individual, company or organisation that is not represented in court by a solicitor or barrister) it deals with. These factors can result is many adjournments and it’s hard to be sure if there has been appropriate disclosure from both sides.

To sum up, divorces are extremely stressful and they can be further complicated when children are involved.

I passionately believe that clients shouldn’t go it alone as having a real person on their side who can guide them through the process, challenge where necessary and advise on their own set of circumstances will give them the best chance of securing a fair and just agreement.

www.clough-willis.co.uk

Lee Marston, became a partner in 2001 and heads up the Family Law team at Clough & Willis.

He is a Resolution Accredited Specialist in the financial side of divorce and children disputes. He was a founding member of the Family Law Panel in 2005 and has practised solely in Family Law for over fifteen years. He is particularly known for his vigour in pursuing his clients’ rights, especially when dealing with financial and parental issues.

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How to Divorce – Is there a ‘Right’ Way?

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Jacky Lewis Mediation Matters London

How to Divorce?

I met a wife in mediation a couple of weeks ago who was clutching her twenty page list of chattels she ‘must have’ from the formal matrimonial home.

She admitted that it was not really about the chattels but more that ‘if I get them then the bastard won’t have them’.

How much had they spent thus far on their divorce? £75,000 each in legal fees.

How about the acrimonious couple whose middle child was seeing her third child-psychologist?

The couple couldn’t sit in the same room together and managed the handover of their children via a nanny at a local MacDonald’s. Neither parent considered their child’s psychological ills were in any way connected to their behaviour. Did their marriage start off like this? Didn’t they set out to love, nurture and protect their children from birth?

Luckily, mediators are much more central in the divorce frame than they were five years ago.

Clients should be encouraged to divorce collaboratively, even when this doesn’t mean embracing the whole Collaborative model.  Often six sessions with a good mediator, agreeing a healthy child-contact or residency plan and clarifying the money issues, with the solicitors in the background to support, then a mediated round table meeting with lawyers, clients and mediator, can get couples much further.  Many issues that might drag on for months and go to a final hearing can be settled in such a half-day mediation.

Here are 7 top tips for couples for a low-strife divorce:

  1. Don’t knee-jerk; take some time to look at the bigger picture; decide your options, see a mediator.
  2. Avoid taking advice from embittered divorcee friends.  Be extra wary of conversations that start: ‘you should take the bastard to the cleaners…’
  3. Get a recommendation to a solicitor who knows how to keep the divorce temperature low.
  4. Find out about Collaborative Divorce.
  5. Look after yourself in divorce; get some counselling; look at www.psychotherapy.org.uk
  6. Be aware of your children’s psychological wellbeing.  There are excellent resources for children of divorcing parents.  Try aKidSpace: www.akidspace.co.uk
  7. Keep communication channels open with your ex-spouse; be aware of your children playing one of you off against the other.
  8. Finally, remember; you will have to parent your children together for ever!

About Jacky Lewis

Jacky Lewis and associates at Mediation Matters London provide skilled, sensitive Alternative Dispute Resolution across the board and mediate all manner of conflict from separation and divorce to corporate matters and including workplace, employment and partner disputes.

We have been working with solicitors, barristers, accountants, insurance and pharmaceutical staff and in local government, political institutions, petrochemicals, retail and financial institutions, health and education authorities, art galleries since November 2000…..

www.mediationmatterslondon.co.uk

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07930 442630

 

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