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The importance of pet nups during divorce proceedings
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Importance of ‘Pet Nups’ Highlighted by Former Couple Ant McPartlin and Lisa Armstrong

Published on
Natasha Abel
Natasha Abel
Family Law Solicitor
Brindley Twist Tafft & James Solicitors

Former spouses Ant McPartlin and Lisa Armstrong have recently been back in the headlines – almost three years after their divorce – this time as they prepare for a fresh battle over custody of their pet dog.

While who might get to keep the pets in the event of a break-up may not be a priority discussion among happy couples, leading solicitor Brindley Twist Tafft & James (BTTJ) warns it can often be a contributory factor in bitter disputes among those who later break up.

Most importantly, any mutual decision should be formalised with an official legal document, or ‘pet nup’.

Most of us have probably made light-hearted comments at one time or another about keeping our pets in the event of a break-up. But without a formalised document such jokes can escalate into full-blown battles between former couples who have gone their separate ways.

We see pets as family and it is so easy for them to become yet another subject of dispute alongside the children, property, pensions and finances.

Once a couple has split up it is in the best interests of both parties to try to reach agreement between themselves over the welfare of a pet.

If no agreement is reached the couple may approach a solicitor who will suggest mediation or, as a last resort, court proceedings.

A pet nup is a detailed agreement between two partners which specifies who the pet lives with, who pays for the upkeep – food, vet bills, insurance and other costs, who decides on medical treatment and what will happen to the animal if the relationship breaks down.

We would always urge that an agreement is formally drawn up and legal advice is sought by both parties before signing the document. Then, if the relationship did break down, it avoids future conflict as to the welfare of the animal.

Some people are happy for their pets to live with one party during the week while the other takes care of them during holidays. Others are happy to look after the pet for half a week each.

As well as couples, pet nups are open to families and even friends who share pets. Although not yet formally recognised, law courts are still very likely to uphold pet nups if it can be proven that:

  • Both parties entered into the agreement freely
  • Neither party was under undue pressure or subject to misrepresentation
  • Both parties sought legal advice
  • Both parties intend that the agreement is final in governing future welfare of the pet
  • Both parties understand the implications of the pet nup
  • There is sufficient evidence within the document to prove that the pet nup is fair and in the interests of the pet.

About Natasha

Natasha Abel is a Family Law Solicitor at Brindley Twist Tafft & James Solicitors, where she deals with a whole range of family matters whether they are straight forward or very complex. She spends 40% of her working time on family matters and 60% of her working time on matrimonial matters.

As a member of Resolution, Natasha works in accordance with their Code of Practice to deal with matters in a constructive manner. Natasha works with her clients to provide support and explore all options including not only the court process, but other methods of dispute resolution to best suit their individual needs.

Natasha is also a member of the Law Society‘s Family Law Panel and has been accredited since 2011. Accreditations within the panel show that the individual is a specialist in their area of law.

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10 Steps to Divorce Financial Settlement
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10 Steps to Divorce Financial Settlement

Published on
Peter Marples
Peter Marples
Director
Fair Result

Agreeing a financial settlement is a huge milestone during the negotiation process of a divorce. It is advised that separating couples obtain a financial order that sets out this settlement, as whilst this is not mandatory, it will make this agreement legally binding.

Some lucky couples can decide on how to divide up their assets, agreeing their financial settlement without the need of going to court. However, to ensure both parties are protected, and the agreement is legally binding, a solicitor can draft a ‘consent order’ that both parties must sign.

This is then sent to the court with a completed Form A (notice of your intention to proceed with an application for a financial order), a Form D81 (statement about the parties’ financial situation to support your application for a consent order), and a £53 fee (administration fee).

However, a lot of couples fail to agree on a divorce financial settlement, which means that the court will have to decide for them.

In most cases, the process will follow the ten steps highlighted below, however, an agreement can be made at any point during this process. If that is the case, then this is agreed and signed in a legally binding court order to confirm all the details.

Providing notice of application – Form A

To kick start the financial settlement process, you will need to send a completed Form A (notice of your intention to proceed with an application for a financial order) to the courts.

This document will outline the kind of financial order you are looking for, at what stage you are at with the divorce or dissolution of a civil partnership proceeding, contact details of the separating couple or legal representatives, and information about the Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM).

First Directions Appointment date

Once you have provided your application, the court will then set a date for the First Directions Appointment (FDA). This is the first hearing in relation to your financial dispute arising from your divorce.

This is an opportunity for the judge to consider what information each party needs to provide to create the divorce financial settlement. Both parties are encouraged to reach an agreement if possible. If this cannot be agreed, a second hearing with the FDA will be arranged to allow for further negotiation.

Financial statement – Form E

Form E (Financial Statement) is an important document in the UK divorce process since it acts as the starting point for the financial settlement negotiations.

Both parties send the court a Form E at least five weeks before the FDA hearing. You must also send a copy to each other.

The purpose of this document is to ensure both parties disclose their financial circumstances, including income, assets, liabilities, and projected financial needs.

FDA documents

These documents are filed by both parties two weeks before the FDA:

  • A concise statement of issues.
  • A chronology of events.
  • A questionnaire which is supposed to address the statement of issues.
  • A Form G, whereby you tell the court whether the FDA meeting can be used for a Financial Dispute Resolution (FDR) appointment. Typically, the FDR meeting takes place after the FDA meeting.

Costs – Form H

At this stage, each party will send the court a completed Form H just before the FDA meeting, listing any costs they have incurred.

This document sets out all the costs of the financial remedy proceedings, including costs from before and after the application was issued.

FDA meeting at court

The judge will consider both you and your partner’s financial disclosures and establish whether further information is required from either of you.

Many judges are keen to see whether a resolution meeting (skip to the final hearing section) can take place at this stage. If not, a date is set for the FDR meeting.

File proposals

Both parties will answer questionnaires, prepare evidence, and submit proposals to the court for the divorce financial settlement.

Both sides also submit a second Form H, which lists updated costs.

FDR hearing

During this hearing, the judge will focus on encouraging both parties to agree on a financial settlement, through judge-led negotiations.

Most divorcing couples settle at this stage (or soon afterwards). If not, the judge will arrange a final hearing, where both parties will need to make new offers and provide evidence.

Further proposals

The negotiations continue between both parties, including revised proposals for the divorce financial settlement which are sent to the court and to the other party.

Final hearing

This is usually the third and final court hearing within the financial remedy process.

In the absence of any agreement and following the submission of updated costs on a Form H1, a new judge will decide on your financial position and impose a settlement on your behalf.

Summary

One of the most important parts of getting a divorce is reaching a financial settlement. Many couples can agree this without the need of going to court however, but a lot of separating partners find difficulty in achieving this.

Perhaps one person is not providing their financial information, or they are not making sensible proposals, in that case, court is advisable.

By following these simple steps and receiving professional advice, you will be on your way to a Fair Result and a happy, brighter future.

Do you require specialist expertise in securing financial settlement? Get in touch with our team today.

Read more articles by Fair Result.

About Peter Marples

Peter Marples – Director of Fair Result and qualified accountant, with the determination to change the way divorce is transacted. For further advice on financial settlements and navigating divorce, use the contact details below:

  • Email
  • Give the team a call – 07500933818 or 0333 577 7009
  • Complete an enquiry form

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How do I find the right family mediator for my divorce?
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How Do I Find the Right Family Mediator for my Divorce?

Published on
Nicki Mitchell
Nicki Mitchell
Partner
Jones Myers

If you opt to settle your divorce through mediation rather than a drawn out, expensive and contentious Court settlement, choosing the right mediator is vital.

Here are some guidelines to help ensure the best possible outcome for you, your ex, and – most importantly – any children involved in your relationship breakdown.

Who chooses the mediator?

The first step if for each of you separately to attend a confidential Mediation Information Assessment Meeting (MIAM) with a qualified mediator who should  be approved by the Family Mediation Council (FMC).

You can appoint your own mediator through the FMC register which lists mediators near where you live.

At the MIAM you both discuss with the mediator key issues that need resolving. If you have children, the mediator should explain to you how your children’s voice can be heard within the process.

The mediator will explain the mediation  process and consider with you alternative ways of resolving the issues between you.  At the end of the session, you and the Mediator will come to a decision together as to whether you think mediation is suitable for you.

Why should the mediator have to be approved by the FMC?

Anyone with no training or qualifications can claim to be a family mediator.

FMC approval gives you the confidence that the mediator entrusted with this crucial role has been trained – and is qualified, and fully insured.

What is the mediator’s role after the MIAM?

If mediation is the way forward, the mediator who conducted your MIAM will set up a joint meeting with the two of you

Your chosen mediator will help you both work out key issues such as children contact and support along with dividing assets, property, pensions, and debts.

It can be very helpful in disputes relating to financial issues for you to use an FMC accredited mediator who is also a family lawyer. Although they will remain impartial in the process, they will be able to give you very useful legal information in the mediation, providing explanations as to how the legal process works and the options available to you around your properties, debt, pension, and income.

Where there is a need for you to take your own legal advice, this will be flagged up by the mediator.

Giving couples control over their divorce, mediation can be completed in as few or as many meetings as you need.  These can take place over a few months or, in some cases, weeks.  Depending on the issues, some couples are able to come to agreed proposals in just one meeting.

Findings from the Family Mediation Council highlight that agreements are reached in over 70% of cases of couples undergoing mediation.

I have seen repeatedly how mediation helps separating couples to find an agreed way forward in a constructive, positive manner which avoids going to Court, prioritises children’s well-being – and supports the long-term interests of all those involved.

Read more articles by Jones Myers.

About Nicki Mitchell

Nicki is a partner at Jones Myers Family Law Solicitors. With extensive experience in family law, Nicki specialises in the financial aspects of relationship breakdown – and particularly complex cases involving family businesses, multiple properties, and complicated pension arrangements.

Skilled in mediation and collaborative family lawyer, Nicki is also a Child Inclusive Mediator which enables her to meet with children of separated parents and hear what they want for their future.

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Is There Any Way of 'Forcing' a Non-Residential Parent to See His/Her Children?
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Is There Any Way of ‘Forcing’ a Non-Residential Parent to See His/Her Children?

Published on
Megan Bennie
Megan Bennie
Family Law Solicitor
Furley Page

For many co-parents, one of the most challenging aspects of separated parenting is when one parent does not choose to spend as much time with their child as the other parent thinks they ought to.   In some cases, a parent may not see their child at all, whether through choice or circumstance.

The short answer to the question of whether a parent can be forced to spend time with their child, which I know will be disappointing for a lot of parents, is no.  If a parent will not spend time with their child, then they cannot be forced to do so.   The courts are not prepared to make orders forcing contact, and it is difficult to see if and how such an order could be enforced, or whether such an order would be beneficial or productive.

It is worth remembering that even if one parent chooses not to see their child, they will still have a responsibility to make child maintenance payments and an application can be made to the Child Maintenance Service if it cannot be agreed directly.

However, where there is already an arrangement in place, by virtue of agreement or a court order, if the arrangement falters, there are steps that can be taken.

There will inevitably be circumstances in which contact does not take place for a period.  For example, illness, holidays, or other life circumstances. Where the change to the contact arrangement is tackled in a way that is sensitive to a child’s needs and courteous to the other parent, this need not be a major issue.

However, in circumstances where the withdrawal from contact/the relationship is for a prolonged period or comes suddenly with no explanation, it can leave children feeling let down, confused and as if they are not a priority.

It can also be distressing for the parent trying to facilitate the contact to see their child upset, and they may feel their efforts are not appreciated, leading to further breakdown in the relationship between the parents.  In such circumstances it may be more appropriate to look at how contact is structured and assess whether a different arrangement might benefit the child and promote contact, allowing for greater consistency.

There are many process options available for these discussions. For example, this could be addressed directly with the other parent, at mediation, by instructing a solicitor or, if all else fails, by making an application to the court:

  • What level is contact set at? The court will bear in mind what is going to be achievable for parents and children.  A parent who struggles to maintain a relationship with very regular contact sessions might be able to achieve less frequent contact, but if that contact is better quality – or actually takes place rather than being cancelled – it could be better for the child involved.
  • By what means is contact taking place? The parent-child relationship may be better maintained by means other than direct face-to-face contact time. Telephone or video calls could bridge the gap, or a parent in difficult circumstances might be able to accommodate those where spending time together in person simply isn’t possible.

For children who might have faced disappointment in the past through repeated or last-minute cancellations, calls or letters might fit more easily into their existing routine and limit the disruption they face, while still maintaining a relationship with the parent they don’t live with.

The age and capability of a child, as well as the effect and perception of any previous issues with contact, are important factors to consider.  What suits one child and promotes positive contact in a particular set of circumstances may not be suitable for another child or another set of circumstances.

If all else fails, the threat that future contact could be reduced can be a ‘stick rather than carrot’ approach to ensuring contact does go ahead.  The court can threaten to or even actually reduce contact, sometimes quite significantly, if it is apparent such a change is in the best interests of the child in question.  However, it would be exceedingly rare to have an order for no contact at all: the court tends to leave a door open for a parent/child relationship to continue except in the most severe of circumstances.

If you have questions about any aspects of child arrangements, whatever your situation, please do feel free to get in touch so one of the team of family law experts at Furley Page can help.

Contact Megan Bennie, Associate Solicitor in Furley Page’s family law team on 01227 763939 or email MEB@furleypage.co.uk.

Read more articles by Furley Page.

About Megan Bennie

Megan Bennie is an Associate in the family law team Furley Page.

Megan joined the team in 2021, having gained valuable previous experience at specialist family law firms featured in the Legal 500 directory.

Megan advises on all aspects of relationship breakdown, whether divorce or separation, including in relation to civil partnerships, dealing with issues such as the appropriate division of finances.

Megan also assists couples seeking to formalise arrangements through pre and post nuptial agreements and cohabitation (or living together) agreements. She can also assist with legal issues arising when cohabitation comes to an end whether there is a cohabitation agreement in place or not.

Megan can provide legal advice on a wide range of areas relating to children including arrangements for contact and who a child lives with, where a child lives (including relocation to another jurisdiction) and in relation to special guardianship and adoption.

Megan is primarily based at the Chatham office but is also available for meetings at either the Canterbury or Whitstable office.

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No Fault divorce is a good start - but what more can be done to support children whose parents are separating?
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No Fault Divorce is a Good Start – But What More Can Be Done to Support Children Whose Parents are Separating?

Published on
Matt Buttery
Matt Buttery
CEO
Triple P UK & Ireland Ltd

Before 2021, couples seeking divorce risked getting caught up in a blame game, unable to separate unless one party was deemed to be at fault. Now, through ‘no- fault’ divorce, the first major reform to divorce since 1970, couples are able to separate more amicably, without finger pointing and conflict.

The implications of this for families, and in particular children, are significant. In a 2018 YouGov poll, 79% of respondents agreed that conflict arising from divorce negatively affects children’s mental health. By allowing parents to admit the marriage has simply run its course, children feel less torn between the two, without the pressure of taking sides with the parent who has been ‘wronged’.

But the legal system is still not perfect for families, and support for the children of separating parents continues to fall short.

With half of all children coming from separated households, and the effects of divorce on children well cited, it is crucial that we ensure the system works in the best way possible to help children grow up happy and healthy.

Recently, the Government suggested that mediation becomes mandatory in all suitable low level family court cases, excluding, of course, those including allegations or a history of domestic violence. This, alongside the current MoJ consultation, will help the legal system improve to better protect children from witnessing their parents work out family disputes in court. But there is still more that can be done to diffuse proceedings and reduce the conflict involved.

One of the biggest changes we all need to address is in language. Language matters – 99% of family professionals said small changes in language used in the divorce proceedings could make a big difference to a child’s experience.

This is because lots of the vocabulary used currently furthers the animosity between parents by pitting them against each other. Words such as ‘battles’, ‘versus’, ‘fight’, ‘opponent’, ‘dispute’ and impersonal references to ‘the child’ are not conducive to nurturing collaborative solutions.

Making the language softer, by using first names for example, shifts the discussions towards finding a joint solution that is best for the whole family. This is something the Family Solutions Group have been calling for, a campaign we are firmly supporting.

At Triple P, this is something we are conscious of too – our programme to support parents going through separation and/or divorce is purposefully named ‘Family Transitions’, helping the couple understand their divorce as a familial change, and not as a fracture.

Language and communication are of course important between family members as well. It is imperative for the way children process a separation, that parents are offered support. This is an upsetting time for the couple and it can be hard for them to know how to communicate what is happening with their family. Evidence-based parenting programmes that focus on family communication and co-parenting help parents develop the skills to resolve conflicts with former partners, as well as supporting their child(ren) and helping to build a new family identity.

By helping children understand as much as possible about what is happening, you help them process the situation and reassure them they are still important and loved. Not only this, a strong relationship between parents post-divorce will help them co-parent effectively after the separation.

Programmes such as Family Transitions work, and support better outcomes for families.  The challenge is how to make them accessible to the number of families that might benefit.  Current investment by the Department of Work and Pensions into the Reducing Parental Conflict programme has gone some way towards this. However, we need more scalable routes such as remote and self-directed online versions of these programmes – and at the end of the day they all cost money to access.

One thought is to widen the scope of the Family Mediation Voucher Scheme to allow these vouchers to be spent on parenting programmes. We believe in the importance of mediation, but also know the emotional readiness to engage is critical to its success. Expanding the scope of the voucher scheme to allow attendance at an evidence-based co-parenting programme alongside mediation, will help to support parents, allowing them to better engage with the separation process. By making these vouchers accessible prior to the filing of the C100 too, mediation and parenting programmes will be genuinely helpful, rather than becoming a tick-box on the way to court.

The family courts are moving in the right direction, with the no-fault divorce and the shift to mandatory mediation being the latest successes for parents and children. But there are still changes that need to be made. For any child, the separation of their parents can be tough. We need to ensure that the process affects them as little as possible by taking the ‘battle’ out of it, and ensuring parents are supported with proven tools so that everyone is given the best chance to understand and adapt to the new family situation.

About Matt Buttery

Matt is the CEO of Triple P UK & Ireland and holds responsibility for the dissemination of the Triple P – Positive Parenting Program® across the UK and Ireland. He is a passionate advocate of using evidence-based practice to help families and communities develop strong, healthy relationships and resilience.

Matt has held various senior roles in the voluntary, statutory and private sectors. He has influenced and implemented health and social care policy across government and held senior positions in charities. He is an Honorary Associate Professor in Family and Parenting Practice and Policy at the University of Warwick, Chair of the Island of Ireland Parenting Network, and is a spokesperson on children and family issues, appearing in national and local media.

Matt previously fostered for over 10 years, and is a former Trustee of the UK National Academy for Parenting Practitioners (NAPP).

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Family professionals show support for the Family Solutions Group call to end the use of ‘battle’ language and the term ‘custody’ following a family separation. Taking the ‘fight’ out of family separation is long overdue to protect children.
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Call to End the Combative Language of Family Separation, on First Anniversary of No Fault Divorce

Published on
Helen Adam
Helen Adam
Chair
Family Solutions Group
  • Family professionals show support for the Family Solutions Group call to end the use of ‘battle’ language and the term ‘custody’ following a family separation. Taking the ‘fight’ out of family separation is long overdue to protect children.
  • Supported by the President of the Family Division, the FSG urges legal professionals to stop using adversarial terms and legal jargon in family separation proceedings.
  • 99% of professionals said the language legal professionals use affects separating clients’ mindsets and their behaviour.
  • 99% of professionals said that small changes in language could make a difference to a child’s experience following their parents’ separation.
  • Professionals say that the biggest obstacles to changing family separation language are habit, and client expectations.

The Family Solutions Group, backed by Sir Andrew McFarlane, President of the Family Division, is calling for a radical change in outdated and combative language used by lawyers, courts, media and wider public in cases of family separation. The call comes on the anniversary of the No Fault Divorce, (Divorce, Dissolution and Separation Act 2020), the biggest shake up in divorce law for more than half a century, which came into force on 6 April 2022, ending the need for separating couples to apportion blame for the breakdown of their marriage, helping them instead to focus on practical decisions involving children or their finances.

Sir Andrew McFarlane, President of the Family Division, addressing a Family Solutions Group event said:

“It’s blindingly obvious that the language we have been using is not appropriate and only goes to stoke the minds of those in a combative mindset, rather than direct them in a different way.”

“…this is not a custody fight, it’s a coming together of parents to work together to reduce the impact on their children and help them resolve their issues about the arrangements for their children, in as low a temperature as possible.”

“And bit by bit the penny is dropping. The language is important. I want to do all I can to bring about a change in the way we use language in the court.”

The Family Solutions Group, set up by Sir Stephen Cobb in 2020, say that battle-stoked language and words like ‘custody’, ‘dispute’ and ‘versus’ can heighten conflict between parents, and can have a long-term negative impact on children caught in the middle. They argue that a simple change in the language of family separation away from adversity and battles, towards safety, wellbeing, and child welfare could improve outcomes for parents and their children.

The Family Solutions Group’s call for change is informed by recent polls of over 400 professionals to find out which words are most harmful and helpful, plus a survey completed by 228 professionals.

  • The Family Solutions Group survey found that a majority (99%) of professionals said that the language legal professionals use affects separating clients’ mindsets and their behaviour, and that small changes in language could affect a child’s experience following their parents’ separation.
  • Professionals were asked whether a move away from legal jargon to plain English in client correspondence and case paperwork could improve outcomes and reduce conflict: 86% strongly agreed and 14% said it might have a positive impact.
  • 98% said that using clients’ first names, rather than words like ‘Applicant’, could also make a difference.
  • Professionals cited the biggest barriers to changing family separation language were: habit 50%, client expectations 22%, vested interests 10% and 5% apathy.
  • Over 400 professionals working with separating families, including mediators, barristers, solicitors, judges, family legal advisors, Cafcass, parent coordinators, relationship therapists, contact centres and clinical psychologists attended three workshops in January, February and March and contributed to polls about language.
  • The words custody, dispute, contact, versus, rights, battle and opponent were thought to be the most harmful and damaging, and their continued use sets the tone for acrimonious parental separation and child arrangements. Specifically, stopping using the word “versus” in court headings, like in the high-profile 1979 Kramer vs. Kramer film, could remove the “battle” element.

The phrase ‘custody’ dates back from another era and is loaded with inappropriate connotations of possession and property.  This was removed from the law by The Children Act 1989 and yet 30 years on it is still widely used across media, social media and by the public.

It’s shocking that harmful terms like ‘custody’ are still commonplace in our society and the media, despite every effort to remove them. The ‘fighting talk’ so often used in the context of family separation sets parents against each other, escalating family problems and putting children at risk.  A ‘custody battle’ suggests a tug of war between parents for the control of their child, with parents pulling against each other. Not only is this 30 years out of date, but it’s harmful to children, unhelpful for parents and ultimately damaging to society.”

In these days of increasing awareness of the impact of language upon minority groups, it is extraordinary that there is such a blind spot over the impact of language on families who separate.  The simple truth is that fuelling aggression and battles between parents increases the risk of harm to their children. Our language should reflect a problem-solving approach rather than stoke the fire of a battle.”

It’s clear from our workshops and survey that it’s time for a major culture shift in our language, as people understand the impact on children. There is now a groundswell of support among family law professionals to dial down their language, replacing adversarial and battle-laden terms with forwards-looking and solutions-focused language.  This is all about protecting child welfare which, under the Children Act, should be our paramount consideration.”

We are grateful to the President of the Family Division for highlighting this important issue and leading the call for change.

The Family Solutions Group is marshalling widespread support across all family legal sectors in calling for the end to the use of unnecessary hostile and combative language in family separation.

About Helen

Helen read law at Cambridge and qualified as a solicitor in 1990. Her legal career started with a leading private client practise in London, and she then moved to a High Street practise to broaden her experience. Following a career break she decided not to return to work as a solicitor, limited to representing one parent, and in 2007 retrained as a mediator. She is a founding Partner of Wells Family Mediation and works with clients online, and in person in Tunbridge Wells and Central London.

Helen is one of the foundation trainers for the Family Mediators’ Association and also a Professional Practise Consultant and a Child Consultant. She is an advocate of bringing the voice of the child into mediation and expects age-appropriate children to be offered the opportunity to be consulted.

She promotes an integrated approach to mediation and, as well as working with other professionals within mediation, encourages her clients to seek legal, financial, personal or parenting support outside of the mediation meetings.

Helen is also involved with family policy work. She was the mediator representative on the Private Law Working Group and in 2020, was invited to set up and chair the Family Solutions Group. It’s report “What About Me?“, focusing on the needs of the child following family separation, was published later that year. Helen continues to chair the Family Solutions Group and their paper “Language Matters” was published in September 2022.

Helen is a regular speaker on the need to reframe support for families following separation to be less adversarial and more child-focussed. She delivered the John Cornwell memorial lecture at the Family Mediators’ Association Conference in 2021, and the Bridget Lindley memorial lecture at the Family Justice Council Conference in 2022.

Helen was awarded ‘Family Mediator of the Year’ and ‘Child-Inclusive Mediator of the Year’ at the National Mediation Awards in 2022.

Helen’s clear and unshakeable professional goal is to support parents, where safe to do so, to handle their separation in a way which enables them to cooperate as parents for the years ahead, to the lasting benefit of their children.

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No-Fault Divorce - One Year On
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No-Fault Divorce – One Year On

Published on
Peter Burgess
Peter Burgess
Founding Partner & Mediator
Burgess Mee Family Law

Contrary to critics decrying no-fault divorce for hastening the demise of marriage, we do not expect the new laws to prompt a long-term rise in the divorce rate. While the number of divorces in April 2023 was double the April 2022 figure, this was likely a temporary spike driven by couples who had been waiting to take advantage of the new no-fault provisions.

The process to apply for a divorce has been streamlined, reducing the early administrative work about who will file, and the basis on which they will do so. It provides separating couples with more certainty and less stress from the outset of their divorce proceedings, encouraging an amicable rather than adversarial approach to achieving fair financial and child agreements.

We have seen an increase in couples using mediation to agree a financial settlement and arrangements relating to their children, rather than heading to the courts, and we expect this trend to continue.

The government is also considering a significant change to the role of mediation within the resolution of disputes to make it mandatory for court users to have attended mediation, suggesting a strengthening of the current use of Mediation Information and Assessment Meetings and more judicial powers to refer into DR processes.

For a reluctant or litigious respondent to the divorce, there is certainly far less opportunity to slow the process down, because it is no longer possible to defend a divorce by objecting to the particulars of a petition.

Meanwhile, the government has recently announced a Law Commission review into the law governing financial provision on divorce. While we await the details of any proposals for reform, any change would need to be the subject of careful consideration, as the current framework provides a discretion that protects from unfair outcomes.

Read more articles by Peter Burgess.

About Peter Burgess

Peter is one of the two founding partners at Burgess Mee Family Law.

Having trained at top family law firm Withers LLP, Peter founded Burgess Mee with in 2013, where he advises on the full spectrum of family law issues across the firm’s three offices. Peter is also an FMC accredited mediator.

Get in touch with Peter today:

  • Email
  • Call on – 0203 824 9952

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How to identify and help survivors of domestic abuse
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How to identify and help survivors of domestic abuse

Published on
Fiona Ryans
Fiona Ryans
Solicitor
Beecham Peacock Newcastle

A staggering one in five people have experienced domestic abuse since the age of 16 in the UK. That amounts to 10.4 million people across the nation. A further one in 20 were the victim of domestic violence between March 2021–March 2022.

These sobering statistics highlight how pressing an issue domestic abuse is in the UK.

Domestic abuse is defined as any threatening behaviour, violence or abuse from a current or ex-partner. This can be psychological, physical, sexual, financial or emotional.

Key findings

  • Domestic abuse has affected one in five adults in the UK since they turned 16.
  • Domestic abuse-related crimes rose by 7.7% between March 2021–2022, according to data from police in England and Wales.
  • In this period, the National Domestic Helpline delivered 50,791 support sessions through phone call or live chat.
  • The domestic abuse-related charging rate increased for the first time in four years, surging to 72.7% in the same timeframe, according to the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS).
  • 5 million domestic-abuse related crimes were reported in England and Wales between March 2021–March 2022.
  • The no-fault divorce law can help victims of domestic abuse to leave their marriages more easily.
  • Identifying the signs of domestic abuse, including injuries and a change in behaviour, will help you support victims.

Identifying signs of domestic abuse

In order to help a victim, you need to understand the signs of domestic abuse. They may be hard to spot – that’s often the aim of the abuser – but it’s possible to discover tell-tale signs.

First of all, physical abuse can leave marks on the victim’s body. Someone who is being physically abused may have regular bruises or physical injuries associated with being choked, punched, or knocked down — and they are likely to have a weak or inconsistent explanation for these injuries.

It’s important to note that they may also have injuries that aren’t visible – if they appear to be in pain with no noticeable symptoms, this could be in indication of domestic abuse.

Domestic abuse causes a lot of emotional distress. People who have experienced domestic violence may come to believe that they will always be under the abuser’s control, or be constantly on edge to the point where they can never truly relax. They may become withdrawn and communicate less often with you. If you begin to notice a change in your friend or loved one, it may be domestic abuse.

Helping people suffering from domestic abuse

1. Take the first step

Any of the above signs can indicate domestic abuse. If you’ve noticed someone hiding bruises with clothes or a reluctance to talk about where their injuries have come from, they may be a victim of domestic abuse. If this is the case, they are likely to find talking about it difficult.

That’s why it may be a good idea for you to take the first step. Start by explaining your concern, along with reassurance that you would be discreet with any information you share. Allow the conversation to develop at a comfortable pace rather than attempting to force the other person to open up.

Remember to pay attention without judging the person. If you pay close attention, your loved one may tell you exactly what they need. Just give the speaker a chance to finish their sentence.

2. Try to understand to their feelings

Domestic abuse can be complex – victims will often be confused about their situation. These feelings are often a combination of guilt, despair, love and fear.

Even if you can’t relate to their experiences, you should validate them. Let them know that these conflicts are normal. However, it’s also crucial to stress that using violence or emotional abuse is unacceptable and that living in constant fear is not normal.

If they haven’t been in other relationships, they may not realise the extent of the abuse. They may have become accustomed to the cycle. Regardless, it’s important that the person in question feels your support and validation – often these feelings can empower domestic abuse survivors to take action, in spite of their fear.

  1. Divorce and family law advice
    If the person you’re helping is married, you can inform them of any possibilities to dissolve the legal binding. Thanks to changes that came into effect in April 2022, they will not need a reason to file for divorce. Although domestic violence qualifies as a grounds for divorce, a no-fault divorce can remove a lot of the stress and emotional manipulation from the situation.

You may also want to help them get information on child custody. In cases involving domestic abuse, they will not have to attend a mediation meeting before going to court. It costs £232 to apply for the court order, but they may be entitled to help if they’re on benefits or a low income.

You might also want to point them in the right direction of legal matters. For many people, the associated costs are a barrier to pursuing and receiving the proper help and support from solicitors. However, subject to a means assessment, victims could be entitled to receive legal aid to help pay fees. And if the victim has received an injury as a result of crime or violence, for example, they may be entitled to receive compensation through the Criminal Injuries Compensation Scheme.

As much as you can try to help, you must let the victim decide if they’d like to prosecute. Depending on the nature of each case and the victim’s preferred outcome, there are various different routes to explore. If the case goes to court, the victim may be expected to give evidence against an abuser. Specialist legal teams can coach victims through this process, but please be aware this can be difficult, both mentally and emotionally. If a case goes to trial, the abuser could face a prison sentence, and could also be subject to a restraining order – which could help give peace of mind for safety.

4. Point them in the right direction

You can help by finding practical resources. Look up telephone numbers for shelters and social services or explore legal options and support groups – it can be helpful for a survivor of domestic abuse to know they aren’t alone.

There are multiple resources available to help women, including The Freephone National Domestic Abuse Helpline. It’s run by Refuge on 0808 2000 247 for free at any time, day or night. The staff will offer confidential, non-judgemental information and support. You can also contact Men’s Advice Line on 0808 8010 327. Specialist emotional and practical support is available from Galop on 0800 999 5428 for LGBTQIA+ survivors of domestic violence.

Formulate an escape plan

Finally, you can help them formulate an escape plan. Making a plan may help them visualise the steps that are necessary to break the system of abuse. In many cases, this preparation is as much mental as physical – often, domestic abuse survivors cannot even fathom the thought of leaving, for their own safety.

Don’t try to rescue someone. The decision to leave and seek support must be made by the victim of domestic abuse. The first step for you, however, is awareness. By regularly checking in with your family and friends and learning the signs of domestic abuse, you could help prevent further harm and even save a life.

Sources

ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/crimeandjustice/bulletins/domesticabuseinenglandandwalesoverview/november2022

gov.uk/government/news/new-divorce-laws-will-come-into-force-from-6-april-2022

gov.uk/looking-after-children-divorce/apply-for-court-order

gov.uk/legal-aid

beechampeacock.co.uk/family-law/domestic-violence/

nationaldahelpline.org.uk

mensadviceline.org.uk

Galop.org.uk

 

Click here for more articles by Fiona

About Fiona Ryans

Fiona Ryans is a solicitor at Beecham Peacock Newcastle, specialising in all areas of family law, including collaborative.

 

 

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Why Court Should be the Last Resort When Divorcing

Published on
Lisa-Marie
Lisa-Marie Leanders
Partner
Nelsons Solicitors

At the beginning of 2022, it was predicted that divorce rates could surge by more than 50% in the UK. The impact of pandemic lockdowns, pressures due to the cost of living increases and changes in legislation such as the no-fault divorce, could all be contributing factors to this.

A top judge has recently raised the issue that around one-fifth of divorces are wrongly ending up in court, which results in a lengthy legal process that could be harmful for those involved. Here, we discuss how the courts can be avoided when obtaining a divorce.

Going to court can be a grizzly affair that can leave both parties worse off than if they avoided it altogether. And contrary to what might seem typical, there are other, better ways to facilitate separation from a spouse than by ending up in the courtroom. Here are some top tips to avoiding the courts during divorce proceedings:

Explore the other options open to you

Family mediation has the aim of encouraging separating couples to sit down together, work out solutions to the financial and/or children-based issues that can arise as part of a divorce, and reach an amicable agreement that suits both parties.

Other processes that can be used to avoid court are collaborative law, where each party selects a specialist family solicitor and engages in a series of four-way meetings to try to reach an agreement. Another process is arbitration, which involves the couple agreeing to put their case to an arbitrator who is appointed to settle the matters in dispute, much like a judge.

There are a number of advantages to pursuing alternative dispute resolution methods and keeping matters out of court. Firstly, it can help all members of the family unit – including, most importantly, the children – move on to the next stage of their lives more quickly.  Secondly, it is not as adversarial as court processes can be, meaning it’s more likely that the parties will be able to maintain important family relationships after the divorce is concluded.

Communication is key

It is normal to feel intense emotions when going through a divorce, but it is important to try and keep these out of the proceedings. Clear communication throughout helps to ensure court can be avoided in order to reach an amicable and swift separation agreement.

Shortening the process also means there’s less time and opportunities for unpleasant feelings to develop and grow, making it easier to move on from the divorce and keep a level of civility which is particularly important for any dependents..

Be realistic

It’s important to understand that by avoiding court, it is the parties who achieve their own settlement. As such, this offers couples peace of mind that, from the very beginning of the process to the conclusion, they are in charge and retain an element of control over the outcome.

However, it is also important for the client to have realistic expectations of what they are entitled to during divorce proceedings, to ensure a swifter agreement is reached, without needing to take it to court. If you are unsure of what to expect, it can be a good idea to talk to a legal professional before the divorce proceedings or any financial negotiations start.

Ultimately, avoiding litigation can help to settle differences without the hostility that can be brought about by court proceedings, which is especially important if there are children involved, as well as providing a quicker process to help the couple move forward with their lives.

Click here for more articles by Lisa-Marie

About Lisa-Marie

Lisa-Marie is a Partner and Solicitor. She qualified as a Solicitor in 2003, was part of the Nelsons’ expert Family Law team from 2010 to 2016 and rejoined the team in December 2020.

Lisa-Marie specialises in family law and advises on divorce and financial settlements which involve complex issues and substantial assets. She also advises on pre and postnuptial agreements, separation agreements and cohabitation agreements along with private law Children Act disputes. Lisa-Marie is a qualified collaborative practitioner.

 

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Solicitors still key to successful separation, despite introduction of ‘no-fault’ divorce 

Published on
Megan Bennie
Megan Bennie
Family Law Solicitor
Furley Page

While it may be tempting to think that no-fault divorce makes lawyers unnecessary to the process, this is far from the case. Taking advice from a solicitor, even if it’s only a single appointment early in the process, can ensure any application starts off correctly and stays on the right track so that it is ultimately concluded in a way that is as efficient and stress free as possible. 

Following the introduction of ‘no-fault‘ divorce in April 2022, one or both spouses now simply need to confirm the marriage has broken down irretrievably. The language used has been simplified and the forms are now accessed through an online portal, which has made the application process for divorce (or dissolution where there is a civil partnership) a lot more straightforward. 

Nevertheless, for most separating couples the divorce application is only one part of the separation process, and sorting out finances and child arrangements can prove much more contentious and challenging.  

Financial matters, particularly the daunting prospect of safeguarding one’s long-term financial future after separation, can be a hugely emotive topic. Many people find that having a solicitor as a ‘buffer’ between themselves and their former partner can help them manage the separation and financial negotiation process a lot more easily. 

Furthermore, a solicitor can be very helpful in dealing with the many complex rules and guidelines that determine what a court would consider a fair financial settlement in that family’s particular circumstances.

As the online divorce process does not formalise the financial settlement, a separate court order (known as a consent order) will still be required, which needs to be properly drafted by a solicitor and approved by the court, even in cases where there is agreement between both parties. A solicitor will also ensure that all aspects of the settlement have been considered, including tax implications and pensions. 

One of the primary concerns our clients have is making suitable, fair arrangements for the care of their children, both in terms of how they will deal with the relationship breakdown and what living arrangements will be put in place thereafter. 

A solicitor can negotiate on their client’s behalf in relation to child arrangements and support them through the court process if this becomes necessary, although for most family’s mediation led by an independent, specially trained third party will be the most suitable route for resolving matters concerning children.  

The best outcomes are achieved through cooperation as, for the most part, separating couples want the same thing: a fair division of their finances to be completed swiftly so they can move forward with their lives. Instructing solicitors who are committed to resolving disputes in a swift, constructive and, if possible, amicable way can make a huge difference to outcomes, costs and stress levels. 

Click here for more articles by Megan

About Megan

Megan Bennie is an Associate in the family law team Furley Page.

Megan joined the team in 2021, having gained valuable previous experience at specialist family law firms featured in the Legal 500 directory.

Megan advises on all aspects of relationship breakdown, whether divorce or separation, including in relation to civil partnerships, dealing with issues such as the appropriate division of finances.

Megan also assists couples seeking to formalise arrangements through pre and post nuptial agreements and cohabitation (or living together) agreements. She can also assist with legal issues arising when cohabitation comes to an end whether there is a cohabitation agreement in place or not.

Megan can provide legal advice on a wide range of areas relating to children including arrangements for contact and who a child lives with, where a child lives (including relocation to another jurisdiction) and in relation to special guardianship and adoption.

Megan is primarily based at the Chatham office but is also available for meetings at either the Canterbury or Whitstable office.

 

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UK couples turning to 'pet-nups' to help resolve disagreements over pets when relationships break down 
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UK couples turning to ‘pet-nups’ to help resolve disagreements over pets when relationships breakdown 

Published on
Megan Bennie
Megan Bennie
Family Law Solicitor
Furley Page

With around 60% of UK households owning a pet, it’s no surprise that who gets custody of any animals can be a key area of negotiation when relationships break down. 

For many people a pet is not just an animal, it’s a fully-fledged member of the family, so it’s no wonder that pets can be a particularly emotive topic for clients when relationships end. Unfortunately, a pet’s treatment by the law hasn’t kept up with the way they are generally viewed by their owners. 

In the UK, the law treats pets as possessions, meaning in a divorce case, a beloved pet would, in theory, be treated by a Court as no different from an armchair or television. 

In reality, the Courts rarely deal with cases regarding pets for a variety of reasons, notably the cost of bringing legal action. When the Court does deal with animal matters, its focus is generally on who is the legal owner or provides the majority of the animal’s care.  

For most people, cases are settled away from the Courtroom through direct discussions between the adults involved, with the needs of the pet and the wishes of any children in the family ideally being a consideration too.  

Some couples are also using ‘pet-nups’ to pre-empt or avoid difficult issues that could arise should a relationship break down. Although not legally binding, the pet-nup can be an essential tool in avoiding stressful and expensive disputes at a later date and keeping the matter out of the Courtroom, and could be taken into consideration if the matter were to end up in Court. 

Where issues can’t be resolved directly or there is no pre-existing agreement, a lawyer can help by negotiating on a client’s behalf to try to ensure they achieve what they want for their pet, whether that’s continued ownership, visitation, or just to know the pet will be well cared for. 

Mediation is another option, whereby an independent third party can help a former couple to work their way through the issues around pet ownership in much the same way they would with issues relating to children of finances. 

Click here for more articles by Furley Page

About Megan Bennie

Megan Bennie is a family law solicitor at Furley Page.  Megan joined the team in 2021, having gained valuable previous experience at specialist family law firms featured in the Legal 500 directory.

Megan advises on all aspects of relationship breakdown, whether divorce or separation, including in relation to civil partnerships, dealing with issues such as the appropriate division of finances and ongoing arrangements for children.

Megan also assists couples seeking to formalise arrangements through pre and post nuptial agreements and cohabitation (or living together) agreements.

Megan is primarily based at the Chatham office but is also available for meetings at either the Canterbury or Whitstable offices.

www.furleypage.co.uk

 

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What’s the role of a divorce mediator
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What’s the role of a divorce mediator?

Published on
Veronica Baxter
Veronica Davis
Legal Assistant
Greater Philadelphia area

Divorce mediators offer couples an alternative to the traditional divorce court system.

Usually, the divorce mediation process is considerably more amicable and less contentious than working through the courts.

With divorce mediation, both parties sit down with a divorce mediator and discuss important issues that usually make court proceedings painful, prolonged, and expensive—like child custody, property division, or child support.

Essentially, mediators help couples settle their divorce outside of court. After all the issues are resolved, the mediator will draft a divorce settlement that gets sent to the court.

This post will break down the benefits of divorce mediation. Let’s dig in.

What Are The Benefits of Divorce Mediation?

Divorce Mediation Helps You Better Navigate The Issues

Divorce mediation can help you settle critical unresolved issues that have impactful financial and familial consequences that can draw out court proceedings and wrack up expenses. A divorce mediator helps both you and your partner take these issues head-on so that when the time comes for the actual divorce, there are no hang-ups or unresolved conflicts that will prolong the experience.

Essentially, divorce mediators help walk divorcees-to-be through the issues before resorting to court. Their services come in handy if you and your partner share many assets or care for a child who has special needs.

Divorce Mediation Gives You More Control Over the Process

In divorce court, the judge has the final say over who gets child custody, who keeps the house, and who gets the car. It’s not to say that judges don’t care about the cases under their jurisdiction, but when their caseload is high, it’s hard for them to give each case the individual care and attention that people seeking divorce deserve.

Nobody knows your situation better than you and your soon-to-be-ex. If possible, you both should determine the fate of the kids and your assets. Divorce mediators help you and your partner settle on your terms.

Divorce Mediation Helps You Settle Faster

If you can resolve your issues before heading to court, you are saving yourself months of drawn-out, contentious court battles with your ex. The courts already move at the speed of molasses on a cold day. If your issues are ironed out before a judge is even appointed, you are drastically increasing the speed at which your case will settle.

Divorce Mediation Saves (Considerable) Money

Needing a divorce attorney to represent you in divorce court causes your expenses to grow exponentially. This is especially true if you have many issues to settle with your ex. By hiring a divorce mediator, you and your spouse agree to split the cost of the service, which is far less expensive than fronting the entire bill of a divorce attorney for several months.

Some mediators allow divorce mediation lawyers to be present to represent each member of the couple, but this is usually discouraged and adds to the expense of the whole process.

When Is Divorce Mediation Not the Best Choice?

Divorce mediation is a valuable service, but it isn’t always the best choice. Divorce mediation doesn’t work well for couples whose relationship dynamics are strongly unequal. You can’t effectively mediate when both parties are not on equal footing.

Divorce mediation is also more expensive than DIY divorce services. However, with DIY divorce services, you are entirely on your own.

Click here for more articles by Veronica Davis

About Veronica Baxter

Veronica Baxter is a legal assistant operating out of the greater Philadelphia area. She frequently works with the Schwartz Law Firm, leeaschwartz.com, a team of dedicated divorce and family law attorneys based in Philadelphia.

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