A Divorce Story – When Fear Takes Over

Charis Rooks
Author and Speake

The first 3 days without my ex-husband in our home was terrifying for me.

I could not sleep because I was constantly checking windows, doors, kids, and then I would start the rotation all over again until daylight.

After those three days passed by I noticed I would lie down but I couldn’t really sleep the way my body wanted me to sleep.  I was mentally and physically exhausted and on top of that I was sleep deprived.

I remember my fear was there are only three of us, me and my two daughters and no male protector in our home anymore, in those moments I felt overwhelmingly vulnerable.

I have come to notice that with divorce we tend to believe fear more so than anything else, I can definitely testify to this. For you it may not be a fear of being alone however, fear is fear regardless of the reason or situation.

Maybe your fear came in the form of a financial burden after the divorce. How will the mortgage get paid or how will I put food on the table. Did your nights become sleepless? Or maybe how will I be able to do everything that we planned for our future now on my own? Or maybe you are saying to yourself that you were barely keeping to a schedule with both of you in the household, so how in the world can you maintain structure alone?

There are several reasons and fear of the unknown seems to be the common denominator. I remember when I finally began to say to myself, “I will not allow fear to operate my car on this journey called life.”  I received an overwhelming sense of peace. I will be honest it wasn’t a onetime thing.

I said it daily and sure enough I began to sleep more and more peacefully as time went on. I began to check the doors less and less until I would check the doors one time and the kids once and I was out like a light bulb.

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After her second divorce, Charis decided that it was time to do something not only for herself but also for other women going through similar struggles.

As a survivor of divorce, Charis knows all about the lies and confusion that come with divorce. Though divorce does eventually end, the emotional scars and stress that come with a difficult divorce do not.

Charis is passionate about speaking the truth to women who are caught in the endless cycle of struggle after divorce and she encourages them to share their stories to help provide not only counseling for themselves but also support for others.

Charis does not limit her time to Draw for Women but also reaches out in other ways.

She is an accomplished and published author, having penned God Rarest Diamonds: A Proverbs Life after Divorce Devotional for women and Coming Soon- The 30 Day Life after Divorce Prayer Challenge for Women, which provides encouragement, support, and spiritual enlightenment to those who are struggling, helping readers bring peace to their life journeys. In addition to Draw for Women and writing,

Charis has a personal life that is as full as her professional life.

Charis is married to a wonderful man and is the mother of two talented and beautiful daughters.

Charis earned her Bachelor’s Degree in Business Technical Management with a concentration in Small Business and Entrepreneurship- Magna Cum Laude in Spring of 2016 and is currently pursuing her MBA.

When she is not working or studying, Charis loves to read, write, and travel. Charis is a dedicated individual who wants nothing more than to share her ideas, experiences, and knowledge to help other women who are struggling with divorce to become comfortable with themselves and with the state of their lives again. 

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Twitter: Charis Rooks @draw4women

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