For many, breaking the bonds of marriage by way of divorce may seem like some sort of a shortcoming, a missed opportunity, or even failure. To be perfectly honest, divorce is anything but
In this day and age divorce is far more common than you might imagine and it certainly does not mean that either party involved is a failure in any way.
Immediately following a divorce or declaration of intent to divorce there are a whirlwind of feelings that tend to set in. In some cases sadness is the most prevalent feeling, in others it is anger, and in still others, it is a feeling that you have failed at your marriage.
Though failure might seem like an obvious feeling to experience, it is one that is completely unfounded.
When it comes to dating immediately following a divorce, waiting until you have started your journey toward complete healing is always the best policy. In the case of divorce it is common and perfectly healthy to have a plethora of emotions either one at a time or all at once and dealing with your emotions and feelings of inadequacy if the first step toward full self-healing.
Instead of focusing on the fact that the marriage is dissolving, it is far healthier to focus on your own feelings of self-worth, to encourage yourself, and to focus on the great attributes that you have.
It is crucial that you take the time to start to heal on your own in order to be able to give the best version of yourself to those that you are dating as well as to yourself.
Though the need or feeling that you need companionship may be strong, you are not doing anyone, including yourself, any favours by rushing into a new relationship when you are still reeling and hurting from the last one.
Instead, try to focus on yourself for a period of a few months or even a year or so depending on how much time you need to feel like yourself again. The right person will be waiting for you to heal in order to have the most meaningful post divorce relationship possible.
ABOUT CHARIS ROOKS
After her second divorce, Charis decided that it was time to do something not only for herself but also for other women going through similar struggles.
As a survivor of divorce, Charis knows all about the lies and confusion that come with divorce. Though divorce does eventually end, the emotional scars and stress that come with a difficult divorce do not.
Charis is passionate about speaking the truth to women who are caught in the endless cycle of struggle after divorce and she encourages them to share their stories to help provide not only counseling for themselves but also support for others.
Charis does not limit her time to Draw for Women but also reaches out in other ways.
She is an accomplished and published author, having penned God Rarest Diamonds: A Proverbs Life after Divorce Devotional for women and Coming Soon- The 30 Day Life after Divorce Prayer Challenge for Women, which provides encouragement, support, and spiritual enlightenment to those who are struggling, helping readers bring peace to their life journeys. In addition to Draw for Women and writing,
Charis has a personal life that is as full as her professional life.
Charis is married to a wonderful man and is the mother of two talented and beautiful daughters.
Charis earned her Bachelor’s Degree in Business Technical Management with a concentration in Small Business and Entrepreneurship- Magna Cum Laude in Spring of 2016 and is currently pursuing her MBA.
When she is not working or studying, Charis loves to read, write, and travel. Charis is a dedicated individual who wants nothing more than to share her ideas, experiences, and knowledge to help other women who are struggling with divorce to become comfortable with themselves and with the state of their lives again.
Twitter: Charis Rooks @draw4women